The [1]rain's racket had weakened enough for it to be like a peaceful way to count time as rain dropped slowly from the roof close to the window. The calm after the tempest, the sun was rising at its own pace without care if people lacked sleep or not.
What time was it?
Generally, Sunless' internal clock was calibrated in such a way that he would wake up before sunrise. Not today, since the ray of light shone brightly to his face.
He wasn't in his bed.
Nothing new on that part.
In three weeks, he had almost forgotten the feeling of his pillow against his face. He had hope for clouds to get in the way between that shining thing called the sun and him, but to his utmost discomfort, the sky was ignoring his dislike of light.
He was about to to cover his face with the blanket until something came to cover his eyes. Placed on his face was a calloused hand, and yet he couldn't say that it felt unpleasant.
[Nephis]:"You took the wrong side of the bed last night."
Her voice was half asleep, a bit groggy but still with its cold indifference that couldn't be mistaken. Turning himself, if he had to look at something, he preferred to look at something… Well, not at something that blinded him early in the morning, that for sure.
Her hand then returned to her, giving him back his sight.
[Sunless]:"I thought…-yawn- that…"
Was last night a dream of something unassumed?
All that mushy and weird talk about being there for the other. Something as incontestable and factual as the sun following the moon?
It would be weird for him to ask about it if it really happened. It could be interpreted as if his words weren't sincere. Which it was; at least he dared to think so. To be fair, he had been lost since he had left the sew-… Since he arrived. From his feeling, to his goal…doubting about his whole being and what to do with it.
[Nephis]:"For once, I wanted to stay until you woke up."
That was also why they never elaborated on their evenings, because every morning, Nephis would leave the bed without him noticing. Maybe it was some way of requesting him not to ask any question about it.
To just follow the flow.
And that's why it had been their secret. One that not even them would talk about.
[Sunless]:"About last night…"
How to formulate it… That was the question worth a month's's worth of synthetic paste. To ask, to dare, and to speak about it.
Her face was as expressionless as it used to be but now, Sunless had started to learn how to read her. From the emotion left untouched in her eyes to the micro mouvement down her lips. And from what he was seeing right now, Nephis was…unreadable.
Yeah, no…he wasn't a master at understanding her yet.
As the girl sighed, movement was born.
The blanket was moved and the moment after, she was standing next to the bed, stretching her body.
[Nephis]:"I'll stay true to my words. Your request…consider it done."
His request.
His greed of asking for more.
To be insatiable and never satisfied with what his hands were holding.
To not face something by himself and to ask someone else to do the work for him. It felt wrong at his very core. And still not every battle could be won single-handedly. Vincent was right. It was not bad if it meant for him to be a step closer to his goal, as greedy as they could get.
[Sunless]:"Thanks Nephis… I don't know how I can repay you."
She was about to walk toward the bathroom only to be stopped mid-movement. Her breathing grew stronger, louder and longer. One single breath was enough for him to understand that he had messed up in some ways.
Holding her training attire under her left arm, her rotating head felt as if someone forced her to do so. Tense, annoyed and still, she kept her calm the best she could.
[Nephis]:"There's no repaying to do and even if there was, I would be the one in debt thanks to the last three weeks. So you'd better be forcing it into your head, there's no price tag between us. If you need help, I'll help and you'll do the same for me. And don't go thinking that you may not be living up to the expectation because if it were the case, I wouldn't have accepted your help to begin with."
He was about to say something, only for the girl to raise her finger in a violent motion.
She was clearly not open to a possible debate about his perspective of himself and what she saw in him to be so…open-armed with him. Ever since his first real talk with Jeanne, she has become decreasingly repulsed by his presence.
From giving tips for him to leave faster to playing with him and now that… She was weird.
A nice kind of weird, but still weird.
[Nephis]:"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to take a shower and Vincent is waiting for you. You can change in there, I'll take my time for once."
On that note, the bathroom's door that was always left open was then closed, leaving the boy alone with his thoughts.
Well, his thoughts and his "duty" since she was right, Vincent was surely waiting for him. In here, they were not strict to the point where they would scream at you for being late. Well, Vincent might spill some remark here and there but it was simply because he was an asshole. Not making a remark would go against his nature.
But they won't be angry for it.
Sunless dared to think that it was due to the fact that they who knew that Nephis and him respected them and that if delay there was, it wasn't against them. Not only that but Sunless had heard quite a few times some hushing between all the grown up about wanting them to slow down a bit.
Nephis was pushing herself without truly resting her mind or her body and Sunless wasn't so different. Just that he was not only focused on rescuing his sister but also on turning himself not in some unbeatable beast but into something frustrating to go against.
He had learned cooking's basics but he wanted to go beyond that. He wanted to master all the doctrine and skills that Vincent was showing him. To hunt, to gather vegetable, to create and look after his tools.
To go from nothing into something.
And so, even without much will in the motion, Sunless was able to push himself out of the bed. Looking at it, he had thought about making the bed but ultimately, it was left to showering girl. After all, she was taking her time today so it wouldn't bother her too much, right?
Dressing himself up to what was yet to come, he rushed outside without looking back. Moving his arms was still unpleasant, but over the course of the last three weeks he had grown used to the feeling.
It could have been worse.
The bruises could have been a bit higher and it would have been a lot harder to deal with it. Well, at least his track suit was covering all his arms so hiding it wasn't truly a problem. Passing through the manor in complete silence, he was forced to walk in front of some doors.
One leading to a mute and gentle soul.
Another to a tired and caring woman.
And… One he wasn't ready to see for now.
He couldn't help himself but to think that each time he decided to ignore those doors, he kept choosing cowardice over relief. That if he were the one making the first move, it would maybe help everyone, him included, to move forward.
Because, since that happened, it would be a lie but to say the manor had grown silent. Missing the noise and laughter that was making it alive in the first place.
All because of…
Gods, he wished he could just curse them and put the blame on them.
After all, they were the one who made the call in here. So if someone were to be blamed, it wouldn't be him. But it felt contradictory for him to hate them as easily as he did while accepting them for their help.
It felt like using them to get what he wanted and to throw them away at the slightest conflict.
It felt bad… Wrong.
Leaving his thoughts for later, Sunless was already outside as his shoes were meeting mud once again. The sound of his own footstep was weirdly satisfying. It reminded him of the rain drops. Some sounds were pleasant to the ears while other were…well, they shouldn't exist in the first place.
[Vincent]:"Took ya long enough. Hard time wakin' up?"
Reaching their little meeting point set in the forest surrounding the manor, Sunless was "welcomed" by the cook. At this point, he had given up on forcing the man from holding up his accent while in his presence.
"What's bred in the bone comes out in the flesh" or something like that.
Well, if he had to learn from, he would still have to endure his mind-wreaking voice, so… The earlier he got used to it, the better.
The cook was seated in front of handmade fireplace. His hands were outstretched, seeking warmth from the flames.
[Sunless]:"You could put it that way… Nice fire by the way, did you have to time to hide our firewood from yesterday's rain?"
A little laugh came from the grumpy man. The type that comes from deep inside your throat, as if it were scratching it on its way out. Raspy, yeah…Raspy would be a good word to describe it.
[Vincent]:"Ain't ya actin' a bit too much like you're the boss of me? You little rat. Ah ah… But yeah, hid it inside some dead tree and covered it with moss. Not the driest. But hey, no need of perfect if good is enough."
It was left unsaid but Sunless knew that Vincent actually liked being with him. At first he had thought that it was simply because they were the minority in here with Master Theseus. However now, he was sure that there was a deeper layer to that.
And to his own surprise, Sunless was also happy to have him in his life.
Sincere, competent, patient, and laid-back enough to have a semblance of a viable sense of humor… The last part was sometimes proved untrue but it was maybe that part that made him liking him the most.
Vincent wasn't some Legacy that was out of touch with reality. Because Sunless was seeing it when silence was taking over them. That look he got while watching the fireplace. The same he himself had occasionally while leaving the shower.
As if a piece of himself had been torn apart from him and all he could do was to relive that memory again and again when not focused on something.
They were similar.
[Sunless]:"Vincent… What happened to you?"
The man was about to joke around until he saw the boy looking at him. Words weren't needed. Pain searching pain. Looking to resonate, to understand.
A moment of pure stillness until it wasn't.
His attention was needed toward the fire, or at least he acted as if.
The metal rod was pushing piece of ignited of wood, letting the crackling sound of controlled destruction telling a story that only Vincent himself could hear.
His arrogant act was dropped.
[Vincent]:" I'm from North America. From a time when laws were legends of the past. The strong lived, and the weak died. Didn't matter their age, their gender, nor their motives. I know starvation. I know the fear of bein' stuck in your hideout, hopin' you don't get found. I know what it feels like to have nothin' but your own blood for taste in your mouth. To be more at ease actin' like a damn beast, 'cause ya don't gotta think. And 'cause thinkin' makes ya doubt and doubt got ya killed."
A few second of silence then came.
Sunless knew that he had nothing to say, because he knew it too.
That saying anything wouldn't change his view on all that. Things happen, and sometimes, all you can do is to relent into your hopeless.
People were saying that North America was the Outskirt before the Outskirt.
Of course, at that time, everything would be comparable to today's Outskirt but North America was the worst in that period. The government had fallen and mafias had tried to reunite people but underground gangs came out the shadows and everyone wanted pieces of everything. So many people died that ancient illness from before the Dark Age came back. It was also why the plague is still known to this day.
There was so much chaos until the first generation of Awakened arrived and tried to keep it under control. It was only with the second generation, with Broken Blade's cohort, that things then started to truly calm down.
Cities were divided by sectors and each sector was a warzone. Fighting over crumbs instead of regrouping to create something greater. Which was even sadder since it had collapsed before it could ever be stabilized again.
It was also why people in the Outskirt aren't that lawless.
Yes there were drugs, murders and underground arenas. You can even find a black market specialized with trafficking people who were passing through their first Nightmare. Still asleep and being already seen as monster to put a leash on.
And yet, an unsaid sets of rules had been in place since the North America's fall.
That if crisis was to happen, or close from happening, people had to be united. Because it wouldn't matter who got the last piece of rat meat if everyone was about to die. In a sad way, North America had shown them the path to follow by being the worst example possible.
[Vincent]:"..."
Still no words coming from the man, lost in his thoughts. Sunless knew better than to "wake him up" so all he could do was seat himself on piece of log, preventing himself from bathing in the mud more than necessary.
That old scarred man had been patient with him, so Sunless wanted to show the same respect.
Until…
[Sunless]:"Who's there ?"
His spine was still recovering from that shiver he just got. Not the kind that came because of the cold, but more like the one coming from your body produced as an alarm.
That someone was watching him.
[Vincent]:""No need to hide yourself anymore. Ya can come out, Dana."
Sunless had turned himself in advance, without real explanation, he knew from where she was looking at him. To his left, around fifteen meters. Closer to Vincent than to him.
The footstep revealed themselves before she even got the chance to show her silhouette.
From behinds trees and bushs came out a woman.
The tallest one in the group, her red hair was still as long and wavy as they were before. Slender, lightly built. Despite her also wearing a tracksuit, Dana was still emanating that elegant aura of hers.
Her ruby-like eyes were looking at him, for once.
[Dana]:"So you do have a keen sense of perception. I was told that you were able to sense someone invisible but…"
Leaving her hiding spot, the tall woman was moving toward the cook, placing her hand on his shoulder in silence. And without a word, Vincent slowly moved one of his to place it over her hand.
[Vincent]:"Told ya, the kid was good."
[Dana]:" There's a difference between knowing and seeing things, Vinc'. "
[Vincent]:""I know, I know… Ya can take care of the explainin'. I ain't in the right mood fer teachin' anythin'."
At least he was self-aware enough to know when to step down.
Sunless wanted to feel bad for putting the man in that state but he couldn't. Or least he was seeing it like he was thankful of Vincent for sharing past, even if it's not the most detailed backstory he had heard in his life.
It was the effort that counted.
Dana was leaving Vincent alone, moving toward Sunless. On his side, Sunny was a little bit afraid of the possible reason behind Dana's presence. After, she was by far the busiest of the group. So for her to be here was meaningful as it can get.
She seemed to be searching for something while looking at him.
[Dana]:"What happened last night?"
[Sunless]:" Huh… Well… What? Couldn't you be vaguer than that with your question ?"
Something in him was pushing him to lie. To dodge the question by any means possible, even if he had to make them doubt about their own name. He would never tell a soul about what truly happened last night.
It wasn't about his thought and what he had said but more about respecting the bond he shared with Nephis. She had acted with him like that because it was him so sharing it wasn't even an option.
[Dana]:" You… Well, you're not wrong. I wanted to talk to you because last night, we felt some killing intent coming from your room. Not that it's something we weren't used to by now coming from Nephis but last night, it was far too strong. To be fair, Plume was about to burst into your room if not for my warning."
Sunless was glaring at Dana without really noticing it. Not that he was angry at her, just… The discussion had returned in him some bad thoughts.
The very same that surely caused that panic without them noticing it.
But still, Sunless wasn't willing to answer without having him take care of peculiar details that started to be difficult to ignore.
[Sunless]:"What warning?"
The woman seemed like she really wanted to not answer that question. Not that she wasn't willing, just that it was surely a difficult subject to explain.
A long breath entered and then left her lungs.
[Dana]:"That your aura is mess."
[Sunless]:"Wait what?"
[Dana]:"Thanks to my Aspect, I can see, feel and hear the aura surrounding me. How to… Hum… Imagine the world as entity on itself, my Aspect allow me to use its senses to know what and more importantly, who is in my surrounding. In what state they are, or in that case, their intent."
[Sunless]:"..."
[Dana]:"Yours is a mess. An aura is something that changes itself naturally, but you…it feels like you can just change it by yourself. No different from a baby pushing random buttons from the TV's remote control.. I swear that sometimes, just looking at you is enough to give me a literal headache."
[Sunless]:"Wow slow down a bit please, I don't understand. No, I think I understand what you just told me, but I don't understand why all that is happening"
The red-haired woman seemed frustrated, since she was tapping her finger at high speed against her own arm. Turning her head, it seemed like she coudln't do it any longer. Her gaze was now focused on a half-buried rock nearby, and it was only now that Sunless was able to see how much tension Dana's face was releasing just by doing so.
It was painful in a weird way.
Like… People being in pain just by looking at him. Was he that much of a weirdo ?
[Dana]:"We don't know either. You're like a lightbulb that goes from being switched off to blinding light without real warning. I had to ask some help to understand your case but… Your aura is too sensitive to your emotion. To a point where you already made yourself invisible to my Aspect. Which isn't even possible for a mundane kid like you."
That was too much for him to handle.
So without much to say, Sunless was already standing up and moving toward the mansion. It felt weird because now he felt self-conscious about what it would imply.
Five steps, that was all he was able to do before being grabbed by the forearm.
A scream of pure pain then rang through the silent woods.
Tears were rolling down his cheeks.
Sunless was capable of keeping his pain in check when it was Nephis holding him since he knew that would happen. Not now. He didn't have to turn his head to know what face the other two would make.
And still he did.
Surprise. Concern. Fear.
Vincent was out of his trance, looking at him as if he were trying to solve a puzzle he didn't know was there. As for Dana, she was still holding him, but without strength. Just to keep him in place. Her ruby-like eyes were full of pity and screamed at him of much she was so sorry for hurting him.
[Dana]:"... Can I ?"
It was too late for him to hide anything, so he stood motionless, looking elsewhere. The woman knew what it meant so she then moved his arms. Kneeling beside him to reduce the possible motion from his arm. She then silently and slowly rolled up his sleeve, only to retain without succes a gasp.
She couldn't say anything, turning her sight toward Vincent, asking a silent question.
But once again, without a word, the answer was well known.
He didn't know either that he had those bruises.
So all she could do was to look closely, only to notice a pattern. It seemed like it was forming a hand, as if he had been grabbed strongly multiple time.
The rain…the thunder… Nephis had been calm those last three weeks despite the weather being stormy every night.
It wasn't difficult to understand.
[Dana]:"You're a strong boy, Sunless… If I were to ask you to stop, you wouldn't accept, would you?"
He wasn't looking at her, and still, he gave her an answer.
[Sunless]:"No. I wouldn't."
[Dana]:"Figured as much…"
The boy was stuck without options to leave, he had already tried to and she had stopped him from doing so. He didn't move, waiting for the possible screaming, punishing or the famous "You could've asked for our help" type of senseless phrase.
But to his surprise..
[Dana]:"I was about to ask you if you wanted to train with me to better handle your "problem". Since you can hide yourself, we can train until you can regulate it yourself. I know its scary but I dare say that you would prefer try to understand it yourself than to simply leave it as it is. As for your injury… I won't tell you what you should or shouldn't do. But can I give you my opinion ?"
It hurt him.
To feel all that caring intent in her voice, as if he was fragile.
Talking to him as if he was just a child in front of her.
Not something to use or worse.
Something broken.
How could he be distant and cold with her when she could have just ordered him to do as she wanted him to do? The others would have never acted like this… Or maybe they would have?
Things started to get messy in his head.
A grimace of discomfort was forming but despite that, he gave her an answer. A simple nod of acceptation.
[Dana]:"I think that we have three option here… We can either resume what Vincent and I had prepared for today like nothing happened. We can also call Jeanne to treat your bruises but I don't think you'll want that. Or… I can ask Vincent to do a quick detour to take for us an ointment to ease the pain. It would make it bearable, but you still have to show it to Jeanne later on. What do you think ?"
Sunless was silent, he wasn't hiding the fact that he was lost by her actions. Looking right at her as if it would show him a piece of truth that he was missing. A reason for him to be distant. And angry… To not trust her.
But what he saw was just the same light he had found his Jeanne's eyes before.
Gentle, caring…wishing for him to take care of himself.
[Dana]:"If you're afraid of her reaction, I can go with you see Jeanne. She wouldn't say anything and we wouldn't impose on you and or on Nephis anything. Okay…?"
She was about to say something else but her attention was pulled on something else. She didn't say anything but her little smile was telling far more than it should.
[Dana]:"Seems like Nephis already asked for Jeanne to see you in your room. Do you want us to come with you or you'll be fine alone?"
'Nephis…she'
The hand that was holding him in place was slowly leaving his forearm. He was free to go without a word but couldn't. His world was full of darkness and sadness. He…
He wanted to feel something else.
To cause something else in people surrounding him other than fear and concern.
She stood silent and even now, she was looking at him. Despite being in pain just before by doing the same thing. So with a trembling hand, Sunless tried to reach for her chin.
Only to push it gently, forcing her to look toward the manor.
[Sunless]:"I'm sorry for causing you pain… But…can you please…hold my hand, Dana?"
He could see the little movement of lips curling up after his demand. Not the kind that would be mocking… But one that came from relief.
She gave a nod to Vincent, as if she were telling him to move for now. Standing up again, Dana was offering her hand for the child waiting beside her.
The child stood there, still hesitating while seeing his request being accepted. Was it alright for him to ask for those things? Was acting like that compatible with his wish? Deep inside him, the question remained… Did he deserve it?
He had already refused that kind of treatment from people that wanted to adopt him. Memory of her, brown-haired woman with her husband… He could swear that he saw her eyes changing colors at time.
Now that he thought about them… He could see that they were good.
Did they cry when he ran away the day before the adoption?
He couldn't know, but he had refused that kindness once…
He didn't want to repeat that error.
So his hand moved too, reaching her as a shy word came out of his lips.
[Sunless]:"thank you Dana…"
She never answered his words, moving silently toward the manor. Hand in hand.
[1] A bit longer than usual but... Once again, the chapter wrote itself. We're close to the end of Part:1 ! Music of the chapter: "Teardrop" - Massive Attack