Kai was lying in bed with one hand inside his pants.
Yeah, it was itchy there since the morning.
Anyway, his focus was entirely on the phone in his hand because he reached the final stage of this ridiculous game called 'Milf Devouring.'
He knew exactly what people would think.
Who names a game like that? Kai thought the same thing until a wildly made thumbnail convinced him to try it out.
And let him tell you, this game was nuts.
Sure, the main goal was sleeping with older women.
But the actual effort it took to get them into bed?
Kai had not been this invested in a combat system since playing tough dark fantasy games.
You had to memorise attack patterns, dodge rolls, and manage your stamina just to get a date.
Fuck, the fighting part was even better than sex.
'Here I come.'
He finally reached the main boss room.
A vampire queen with big boobs was waiting for him on the other side of the big double doors.
The grip on his phone tightened.
Ding!
'What?'
[Single Mom Lisa is near you. 3km away.]
The notification popped up right before he was about to press resume.
It instantly redirected his phone browser to a random adult website full of pop-ups.
'No. I do not need Lisa.'
He hurried to close the tabs.
'Give me my vampire succubus and let me finish this.'
He finally got back to the game screen.
[You have died.]
'Ah shit.'
Kai threw the phone on the bed.
He was careful not to break it since it was his only one.
Kai was twenty-one and a fresh graduate, but he wasn't unemployed like you might guess.
He was a junior game designer.
Right now, he was supposed to be playing this game as a study session.
Everyone knows smut sells, and his small indie team planned on making one to pay the bills.
But now he was just pissed.
He had to try the whole boss run from the very beginning.
The save points in this game were terrible.
Ding!
Another notification?
Which single mother was texting him now?
[Vampire Succubus invites you for a trial.]
'Huh?'
Kai stared at the screen, dumbfounded.
Was this some kind of glitch?
He was supposed to defeat three tough subordinates before even reaching her chamber again.
But he didn't wait to stop and think about it.
He just clicked the link.
[Welcome to Milf Devouring.]
This time, the text wasn't on his phone screen.
It appeared right near his eyes and looked very clear and real, like a VR without the headset.
[You are a wanderer in the continent of Melodia.]
[The First objective is to unlock your ability.]
[Clearing the objective will level you up.]
[Try to sleep with everyone.]
'What kind of objective is that?'
Before Kai could toss the phone away, he was sucked into the screen like a vortex pulling him down.
His mind went totally numb, and he couldn't remember how long he floated in that dark space.
"Wake up, Kai. Wake the fuck up."
Someone was shaking him from the side, but he couldn't force his eyes open.
Then something wet and soft landed on his lips.
'Muah.'
[System Initialising.]
[Welcome Host.]
Kai opened his eyes, expecting a beautiful fairy guide, but instead, he saw a brown deer licking his face.
"Fuck off."
He shooed the animal away and wiped his mouth with his sleeve.
[First hidden event complete: First Kiss.]
'Was this a joke?' Kai groaned and sat up.
'My first kiss in this new world was a deer? The devs are trolling me.'
[Rewards: 2x Bonus for next kill.]
The deer just stared at him and started chewing on some grass.
Then it turned around and ran away.
Kai sat there for a minute and wiped his mouth again.
So Gross.
He stood up and brushed dirt off his jeans.
Looking around, giant green trees are over him, large enough to hide the sky completely.
'Wanderer class,' he thought.
'Worst class ever. Zero starting perks.'
He called up his status window mentally, hoping he remembered the controls right.
The status box appeared.
[Status Window]
Strength: 4
Stamina: 5
Endurance: 3
Durability: 2
Luck: 1
Mana: 0
Bond: 0
'Okay, these numbers suck.' He stared at the blue glowing box.
'Bond zero? That makes sense. I just got here.
But luck one? That feels like a personal attack.'
Then something moved in the bush nearby.
Kai froze hearing the sound.
A low growl echoed from the shadows.
'Please be a low-level slime.'
He stepped back slowly.
'Or a slow turtle. I can beat a turtle.'
A creature jumped out of the bushes. It wasn't a slime but looked like a wolf, and it stood on two legs like a man.
It wore ripped leather pants and was easily six feet tall, with thick fur and yellow eyes staring right at him.
Its dick was pulsing, and drool dripped from its jaws.
'Are you fucking kidding me?' Kai swallowed hard.
[Enemy spotted: Horny Direwolf.]
[Level: 3.]