"Jaehyun once thought nothing could be worse than paperwork.He was wrong. Babies exist."
The Arrival
They brought the baby in a golden pod.
Like, literally golden — lined with velvet, guarded by soldiers, and escorted by three healers.
Jaehyun blinked at it.
"…Why does he have more security than the Prime Minister?"
The soldier saluted. "Sir, this is Chae Bongyu, the second Green Awakener. Codename: Sprout-02."
"SPR—WHAT—No! Don't give him a codename! He's a baby, not a war machine!"
The pod hissed open with dramatic smoke.
Inside was a chubby infant, wide-eyed and curious… and glowing faintly green.
The baby giggled——and the grass under Jaehyun's feet instantly grew ten centimeters.
Jaehyun's jaw dropped. "You've got to be kidding me."
Two Days Later: Jaehyun's Farm of Misery
Jaehyun sat slumped under an umbrella, dark circles under his eyes.In front of him, baby Bongyu floated happily in a makeshift stroller powered by his own aura.Around them, crops were growing at ridiculous speed.
Yuri waved a clipboard. "Sir! The baby's growth rate is ten times yours!"
Jaehyun blinked slowly. "Cool. Fire me."
Woojin appeared, holding a camera. "The baby smiles, things bloom! We should put him on live broadcast!"
Jaehyun's head thunked against the table. "I hate everything."
The Bongyu Phenomenon
The news spread overnight.
"NEW GREEN PRODIGY BLOOMS LIFE IN SECONDS!""Choi Jaehyun's Baby Successor Heralds Second Agricultural Age!"
People chanted the baby's name in the streets.Merchandise appeared. Plushies. Posters.Someone even made a "Baby Bongyu Aura Diffuser."
Meanwhile, Jaehyun was sitting in the mud, dead-eyed, while Bongyu floated around him like a happy little sunbeam.
"Goo~" the baby cooed, pointing at Jaehyun's bok choy field.
"Don't look at me like that," Jaehyun muttered. "You're too young to judge me."
"Guu!" Bongyu waved his hands — and the entire bok choy patch doubled in size.
Yuri screamed. "Director! He just achieved exponential chlorophyll output!"
Jaehyun stared in silence.Then fell backward, face-first into the dirt.
Internal monologue:
'I trained for weeks to grow three leaves.This baby sneezes and makes a forest.Life is meaningless.'
Government Meeting #1300: "The Mentor Program"
"Choi Jaehyun," said the Minister, "you are officially appointed as Baby Bongyu's mentor."
Jaehyun's expression didn't change for a full thirty seconds.
Then: "I refuse."
"You can't refuse."
"I am refusing louder now."
"The council insists."
He buried his face in his hands. "You're telling me to train someone who already outperforms me by existing?"
The Minister smiled. "We call it 'inter-generational photosynthetic transfer.'"
"Stop giving stupidity fancy names!"
Training Begins (a.k.a. Jaehyun's Nervous Breakdown)
Day 1: Bongyu grew ten trees by laughing.Day 2: Bongyu made a sunflower taller than a building.Day 3: Bongyu called Jaehyun "Jae-papa."
Jaehyun froze.Then dramatically turned away. "Don't you dare call me that again."
"Papaaa~"
BOOM. A ring of glowing sprouts erupted around them.
Woojin shouted, "HE SAID DADA AND SUMMONED LIFE!"Jaehyun screamed, "STOP BEING SO POWERFUL WHEN YOU'RE CUTE!"
Jaehyun's Spiral Into Existential Crisis
That night, Jaehyun sat by the campfire, staring at his own hands.
"Why… why am I even here?" he muttered. "I'm just an outdated model. The knockoff Green Awakener."
Bongyu waddled up, holding a small flower. "Pwa~?"
Jaehyun sighed. "Don't give me pity flowers. I have pride."
The baby blinked once, then placed the flower in Jaehyun's lap anyway.
The flower bloomed instantly — bright, vivid green under the stars.
For a moment, Jaehyun went silent.
Then he whispered, "...fine. Maybe you're not the worst."
The baby sneezed, and five more flowers appeared.
Jaehyun deadpanned. "Okay, I take it back."
End Scene — "The Green Duo"
News headlines the next morning read:
"FATHER AND SON TEAM REDEFINE AGRICULTURE!""THE GREEN GENERATION HAS BEGUN!"
Jaehyun stared at the newspaper, expression hollow.Woojin grinned. "Hey, you're trending again!"Yuri added, "They're calling you Papa Chlorophyll!"
Jaehyun slowly set the paper down, face utterly expressionless.
"Yuri," he said softly."Yes, Director?""Burn it all."
Thus began the tragicomic tale of Choi Jaehyun: reluctant mentor, full-time babysitter, part-time national hero, and the only man in history to lose a popularity contest to a baby.