This morning was quiet.
Way too quiet.
No screaming goblins, no "Customer Discount Brawls" outside the entrance, no adventurers begging for a two-for-one potion deal.
Just me, the hum of the fluorescent lights and the slow drip of my coffee machine (the normal one, not the legendary one I can't afford yet).
That's when the door's bell jingled.
I glanced up.
It was him.
The Floor 1 Boss. The big guy I'd rarely seen, but a voice that sounded like it had eaten gravel for breakfast. The one who'd tried to intimidate me back when I opened the store failed miserably, and then left with tea.
He didn't belong here.
Like, sure, adventurers, goblins, mushroom folk, whatever.
They wandered in.
But frequent visits from Boss monsters? In my shop?
No, that was new.
He stepped inside, the floor creaking under his armored boots.
He ducked slightly.
His gaze swept over the fridges, the shelves, the noodle wall.
"Convenience man." His voice was low, heavy.
"Grunt" I said, because continueing to call him "Boss" felt weird.
He stopped in front of the ramen shelf and picked up a pack like it was some kind of sacred relic. He turned it over in his massive gauntlet.
"This place..." he muttered. "It is
.. important."
I blinked. "Important? To who? The dungeon? Adventurers? Hungry goblins?"
He froze. His shoulders stiffened. "I have said too much."
"Wait, what does that even mean?!" I leaned forward. "Important how?"
He shook his head and dropped the ramen back on the shelf like it had burned him.
The packet landed upside down.
He didn't fix it.
That's how shaken he was.
His eyes turned toward me one last time. "Forget my words. Forget them, shopkeeper."
Then the bell jingled again as he practically fled the store, armored boots clanging down the corridor.
Before I could process what just happened, the air shimmered.
And then, right in the middle of aisle three, between the instant coffee and the tissues, the Dungeon appeared.
Not like a monster.
Not like a person.
Just a… presence.
Shifting shadows, a flicker of a humanoid outline, like reality had decided to buffer at 144p.
"Ah. He visited" the Dungeon said in its usual calm, detached voice.
"Visited?!" I snapped. "He basically told me this store is... important. That I have some kind of purpose. And then he bailed! What does that even mean?!"
"..."
The Dungeon was silent for a beat.
Then it tilted its head (or maybe the shadows tilted, hard to tell).
"Have you considered stocking more flavors of potato chips?"
I groaned. "Are you serious right now?"
"Yes. Salt-and-vinegar is underrepresented in your selection."
I smacked my forehead against the counter.
The bell exploded open as the door slammed wide.
"COUPON GANG REPORTING FOR DUTY!"
Grip, Snip, and Clink charged in like they were a SWAT team busting into a drug den. Except instead of tactical gear, they wore... outfits.
Ridiculous outfits.
Grip had on what looked like a sailor uniform. Snip was dressed in a wizard robe three sizes too big, with a staff that was clearly a mop. Clink... was in a bunny suit. Pink ears, fluffy tail, everything.
I just stared.
Slowly.
"...Why."
Grip slammed a fist to his chest. "For morale!"
Snip raised the mop-staff. "For intimidation!"
Clink wiggled his bunny tail. "For the love of coupons!"
I glanced at the Dungeon.
"This is your fault somehow, isn't it?"
"I deny any involvement in their existence." the Dungeon said smoothly. "Although... they are entertaining."
The Coupon Gang immediately started setting up a "COUPON JUSTICE DESK" in front of the register, scattering flyers everywhere. Each flyer read:
BUY TWO NOODLES, GET ONE FREE! (Exclusions: Everything.)
I leaned against the counter, watching chaos bloom in my own store.
"So let me get this straight" I muttered.
"Floor 1 Boss shows up, drops a cryptic hint about how this store is important, then bolts like I caught him stealing candy. You, the literal Dungeon, show up, avoid the subject and redirect me to potato chips. Now I have goblins running a fake coupon stand while dressed like rejects from a fantasy costume party."
The Dungeon was silent again. Then
"...Yes."
I sighed.
Long.
Loud.
Painful.
This was my life now.
Points: 1365
Gold: 0
Reputation: Store now officially recognized by Floor 1 Boss (?)