"Damn." York sounded surprised then as I polished off my own blood with a noise of pure satisfaction. Everyone was once again staring at me. Aster chuckled nervously, and I slammed the cup down on the table.
"That was fucking delicious." I grinned at Banks, who smiled right back.
"See?! What did I tell ya?" He stood up then, setting his empty cup down. He dragged his chair beside me and sat back down once we were side by side.
"Tell me kid," he started, "have you thought of a name yet? I'm tired of not having anything to call you."
I shrugged. "I literally have no idea how I'm supposed to pick a name for myself. And it has to start with the letter Z? What the fuck am I supposed to do with that?" I scoffed and Banks roared with laughter, leaning forward and smacking his knee. "It wasn't that funny." I furrowed my brow at him.
I jumped a little when Aster pulled up a chair too. He was holding a cup, and I raised a brow at him.
He shrugged, looking rather sheepish. "You two look very happy over here."
"Be happy with us." Banks grinned and smacked his hand on my knee.
"I hate being touched; did you know that?" I turned to look at Banks. His face fell a little. "I wasn't trying to make you uncomfortable. I'm trying to get used to it. But you all are very touchy." Jesus, was that blood I drank or truth serum? Those were thoughts that should've been kept to myself.
Aster chuckled a little as he downed his cup.
"Geez, someone wasn't hugged as a child." Banks sat back in his chair, crossing his arms. He looked annoyed.
"I wasn't." I said, trying to patch things up a little. But it just made him look at me like he didn't believe me. "No, I'm serious. It's funny this is coming up because I was just trying to remember if I had ever been hugged by my mother, and I don't think I have." I scratched the back of my head awkwardly. I think I made things weird. The truth was just spilling out.
"No one will hug me because of the way I look." Aster sighed heavily. My brow furrowed, and I felt tears stinging at my eyes. Holy shit was I crying? This blood was a trip; my emotions were all over the place. I felt light and fuzzy too, and kind of like my mind was on autopilot.
I stood up then and held my arms out. Aster looked up weirdly at me.
"Give me a hug, right fucking now."
"Y'all are creeps." I heard Nico muttering from where he still stood watching from the sidelines. I shot him a glare.
"I am very comfortable with myself, pretty boy. Are you?" His nose scrunched up at me, and he turned his face away with a scoff. I turned back to Aster. "Are you really going to leave me hanging?" I raised a brow at him.
He quickly stood up. I'm taller now, so he didn't tower over me quite as much, but he still had to crouch down a little to my level.
I wrapped my arms around him, and he did the same. It was a little stiff, it's not like we melted into each other or anything, but he looked happy when I pulled away.
"You are definitely strange." I heard Banks muttering from his seat. "York! Get me some more blood!"
"Seriously?! After you didn't get me any?"
"Come on York! Get us more!" I grinned at my mentor. He rolled his eyes but hopped up from where he'd been sitting on the edge of the table watching us and walked off towards where the blood is kept.
I crashed back into my seat, taking a deep breath and blinking a couple times. Everything was really intense in my eyes all of a sudden. Everything was very sharp, very clear.
Maybe I shouldn't have gotten intoxicated while I was still adjusting to my new senses.
"What did I miss?" I turned to the sound of Jaskier coming back into the room.
"I'm fucked up." I raised my hand, smiling at him.
"I am also." Aster raised his hand. Banks grunted and half raised his hand.
"I was gone for like six minutes." Jaskier complained, but he pulled up a chair too, and a small circle began to form.
Especially when Jaskier turned around to Nico and said, "Why are you just standing back there? At least sit down."
Nico hesitated for a second longer but finally grabbed a stone chair and dragged it next to Jaskier. Jaskier started teasing him immediately about being shy, and Banks jabbed me in the side with his elbow.
"Did you have a girlfriend or something when you were alive?" He asked when I look at him. I shook my head.
"I've had my share of encounters, but I've only ever loved one person in my entire life I think." I nodded firmly. Banks was very quiet for a moment.
"Who was that?"
"My sister. Her name was Jasmine, but I always called her Jazzy." I smiled a little, her face popping up in my mind. She had long brown hair with honey highlights and big green eyes that always looked at me with such emotion. She felt so much for being born in a household that didn't allow feelings.
"Were your parents abusive?" Banks asked. I could tell Nico and Jaskier were listening now.
I quickly shook my head. "No, nothing like that. They never hit me or locked me in a closet. They fed me all the meals, gave me trendy clothes to wear. But they also never told me they loved me, or that they were proud of me. They would remind me and my sister that we were burdens on their lives all the time. My mom would tell me at least once a week, "work hard, but not too hard, because it doesn't really matter in the end. You'll always be nothing, a zero. No one is special." And it's not like she was wrong; it just made it hard to love her, I guess." I shrugged, meeting eyes with Banks again.
"Holy shit that's perfect." I turned to raise a brow at York, who had just come back into the room with more cups and a few bags of blood.
"I'm sorry?" I had never thought of my childhood as "perfect."
"No, no." He shook his head and rushed forward to set everything down on the table. He jumped up on it too, crawling over so he could be in front of us all in our circle.
"Zero. For your name."
"Huh." I looked down at the ground, rolling it around in my head. I literally hadn't been able to think of anything so far, and it wasn't awful, to be honest.
"Yes, let's enforce that childhood trauma." Nico nodded and gave a sarcastic thumbs up at York, who just flipped him off in response.
I shrugged. "I mean, I don't hate it. What are my other options? Zach?" I shook my head. "No. Zero is it."
I nodded at Aster across from me.
"My new name is Zero."