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Divine Headaches: Hades' Guide to Pantheon Level Drama

n_t_quill
7
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The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
Hades, Lord of the Underworld, has had enough of being the boogeyman of the Greek pantheon. After eons as the brooding, underappreciated ruler of the dead, he decides it’s time for a change—one that might improve his reputation and give him a break from his unchanging duties. So Hades does what any ancient, immortal god desperate for a rebrand would do—he becomes a licensed therapist. Welcome to the Underworld Wellness Centre, where divine beings are invited to unpack their trauma instead of unleashing it on humanity. What begins as a well-meaning attempt to improve his reputation (and perhaps prove he is the only functional adult in the Greek pantheon) quickly spirals into chaos. Because gods, it turns out, are terrible at self-reflection. His clients range from serial cheaters allergic to accountability, narcissists with control issues, and immortals nursing mommy and daddy issues older than civilization itself. And just when Hades thinks he understands dysfunction, deities from other mythologies start booking appointments—each one more volatile than the last. Between marriage crises, existential meltdowns, and one terrifying goddess who can’t decide whether she wants to devour him or seduce him, Hades finds that managing the dead was significantly easier than managing the living egos of the divine. The question is no longer whether Hades can fix them. It’s whether immortal natures are as unchangeable as the fates that bind them… and whether the Lord of the Dead can survive the emotional (and physical) carnage of his own clients.
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Chapter 1 - Message from the author||Disclaimer

Before you proceed: Hades may be many things : ruler of the Underworld, reluctant administrator of the dead, surprisingly patient listener ; and in this story, he is indeed a licensed and practicing therapist. The author (me), however, is not. 

While this novel includes therapy sessions, psychological terminology, and various mental health conditions, I am not a psychologist, psychiatrist, or medical professional. Research was conducted in good faith, but everything in these pages is filtered through a fictional lens, satire, and the occasional divine meltdown. That is to say, the mental health themes portrayed throughout the story and conditions depicted have been shaped by the storytelling and may not fully reflect how these conditions present in real life, outside of Hades' clinic. Please do not treat anything in this book as professional advice.

If you require real-world mental health support, consult a qualified professional. Preferably one who does not conduct sessions beside the River Styx.This novel also reimagines gods, myths, and belief systems from various cultures. These portrayals are fictional, comedic, and not intended to offend, diminish, or misrepresent any tradition or faith.Kindly take everything herein with a grain of salt ... or a pomegranate seed.

Thank you for reading,

NT Quill.