In his dream, Ren Yamamoto felt as if someone had struck his skull with an iron bar. An avalanche of memories, some his own, but many not, flooded his mind in a blinding torrent. For a moment, he thought he was being switched off, becoming a completely different person. But his will held firm; those memories that didn't belong to him eventually became like videos, sinking into his mind, as vague as an adult's childhood memories - you can strain to remember them, but you can't access them.
But everyone has a dream experience with the past. Ren was in that state now. In his dream, he was someone else, seemingly a girl.
She was sprawled on the floor of her room, eating potato chips, drinking soda, her eyes glued to the computer screen. A familiar anime was playing on the screen - Ao Haru Ride.
Ren had never watched it before, but in the girl's body, the title instantly came to mind. As strange as the dream was, he saw himself watching the romantic series through her eyes, sharing her emotions, her comfort, and her pure happiness.
Japan's anime, manga, and game productions were among the largest in the world; for children and teenagers, being an otaku was practically commonplace. Ren was no exception. And as bizarre as the dream was, it was comforting and welcoming. You could feel her happiness flowing through it.
The girl in his dream watched episode after episode of the anime; she had no school to attend, no job to worry about. Her parents had passed away long ago, but they left a huge inheritance in a trust fund - millions of yen in annual dividends that she could spend as she pleased. Her life was otaku paradise: cosplaying at conventions, collecting figures, binge-watching series, and investing all her money in hobbies.
The possibility of being penniless was practically nonexistent in her life, and Ren was enveloped by this prospect, feeling and enjoying the same important joy.
"So this is the pinnacle of the otaku lifestyle… She's truly living the dream."
At one point, the girl ordered Abe Kawa Mochi (sweet, soft rice cakes filled with melted sugar), dipped them in chili and cilantro, and ate them with utter delight.
Ren, having requested to "taste" the flavor through the dream, almost vomited. Even so, like me, happy, unperturbed. For her, a mix of sweet, salty, and spicy is the perfect combination.
Unfortunately, there was no cilantro at home today, so this rice cake delivery only deserves 90 out of 100. Meanwhile, Ren tried his best to forget the strange taste he ate after immersing himself in the feminine world. His attention was focused on the computer screen displaying the anime on the table in his field of vision.
The soft colors, the jovial atmosphere, the awkward yet tender romance… It captivated him, even though he didn't normally like shoujo anime. The two, who once had mutual feelings, meet again in high school three years later, amidst misunderstandings, youth, and celebrations. Before you know it, you've reached the sixth episode - the part where Futaba must decide whether to sacrifice her love to protect a friendship… or confess her feelings and risk losing her friend forever.
Unable to choose, she leaves the decision in Kou's hands.
She gets off the train at the last second, pretending to have forgotten something at school. The doors close between them. One step from him. One choice of distance.
Will he get off and accompany her to school to retrieve the object she forgot? Or will it be too much trouble for him? Will he go home alone, leaving Futaba to retrieve the object alone?
"If he follows me off the train… I will still love him."
"If he doesn't follow… I will give up."
Ren held his breath. Kou's choice, a second later, would determine whether Futaba would continue to nurture her unrequited love for him.
"Ah, I can't do this. If Kou doesn't leave, I'll be too stressed to sleep. I'll watch the rest tomorrow," the girl murmured. She closed the laptop without hesitation.
Ren's consciousness shuddered in horror.
"NO, DON'T STOP THERE. YOU MONSTER. AT LEAST FINISH THE EPISODE!"
The screen went black and Ren cursed unconsciously, the nausea of having an incredible work abruptly interrupted at a crucial moment growing inside him.
Then the dream also darkened.
Ren woke up startled in his own bed, drenched in sweat.
"What… was that?"
The dream had been too vivid. And the unimaginative memories - surprisingly real.
A sudden understanding struck him.
An isekai soul… a girl from another world. She tried to finance herself through me. But the merger partially failed.
No, it hadn't partially failed. His will had been extinguished, leaving only remnants of her memories sealed deep within his brain. Occasionally, he could see fragments of her life in that world in his dreams.
The last anime episode she had watched had been interrupted halfway through, meaning his "access" to the story had also been interrupted. And that thought infuriated him.
"So that anime is called 'Ao Haru Ride'... Damn it!"
The girl had fallen asleep mid-episode, meaning he had been forced to abandon it.
But immediately, the desire to watch the series through the girl's memories was instantly shattered by reality. In the dream, being in the girl's perspective and feeling her emotions, the worries and problems of reality disappeared.
But when Ren woke up, the immense pressure of reality he had faced in the last month returned in full force.
Ren Yamamoto, 16 years old.
Height: 176 cm. Weight: 63 kg.
Second-year high school student at Yokohama Minami School.
Mother: deceased ten years ago.
Father: recently deceased.
A month prior, his father's small business had gone bankrupt due to the economic crisis. Crushed by debt and despair, he committed suicide, taking his lover with him.
Newspapers loved tragedies like this. But living in the midst of a different era. Ren was shocked, then devastated. But the pain soon gave way to cold, merciless reality.
The debts were enormous. Selling the apartment wouldn't even cover half of them. Ren refused to inherit the debt, so that legally he wouldn't owe anything, but he still owed more than two million yen on the mortgage, which also meant the house would be foreclosed on in a few months. He would lose his only place to live.
As for his relatives…
Those who used to visit him during the holidays were now creditors, furious that he refused to pay debts that technically weren't his. He had burned bridges simply to survive.
At sixteen, Ren was about to become homeless in less than six months.
He had 40,000 yen in savings. That 's all.
He planned to use the money to take his girlfriend - the class representative, Rina - to a winter festival. But when she learned that her family had gone bankrupt, she broke up with him immediately.
Ren understood why. But understanding didn't lessen the pain.
Survival was now his priority.
Should he drop out of school and work?
Or persevere and at least finish high school?
University would require loans to cover tuition, but loans existed anyway. Surviving the next year and a half, that was the real challenge.
"Anyway, I need to survive the next year and a half of high school. Dropping out now, without even graduating, with only my elementary school diploma, will be incredibly difficult here. Besides, after more than ten years of studying, half of my high school life is already over, and not even getting a diploma is very hard to accept." Ren is a person with relatively strong mental resilience; otherwise, he wouldn't have been able to recover in just one month from his father's death, his family's bankruptcy, the imminent eviction, and the end of his relationship with his girlfriend.
"Forty thousand yen doesn't even cover a month's rent in Yokohama…" he muttered bitterly.
He lay on his back, his eyes scanning his shelves full of manga, DVDs, and light novels. Then…
A spark.
"…I don't know how to draw. I don't know how to program games. I don't know how to do storyboards…"
He paused.
"But I know how to write."
His grades in Japanese had always been good. And the anime he saw in his dream - Ao Haru Ride - was far better than many of the amateur light novels he owned.
Yokohama had several local publishers that accepted work from new authors.
"What if… I adapted it into a light novel? Published it? Even if it didn't become a success, the publishing fee alone could cover the rent."
His heart raced. For the first time in weeks, he felt hope.
Sure, the industry was brutal. Graveyards for newcomers, as people said. But brutal because success paid incredibly well.
And Ren had something rare: a story that didn't exist in this world's market.
He didn't need it to be a bestseller. Just enough to survive.
Best of all: writing wouldn't interfere with his studies.
He could write during boring classes, maintain his grades, and avoid dropping out of school.
"Man… I might actually be a genius."
He sat down, looking at his desk and the blank notebook that awaited him.
Then a problem arose.
He had only seen half of the anime in his dream. The rest depended on whether the girl's fragmented memories resurfaced.
Would tonight's dream continue? Would he see the ending again?
"…Who cares?"
That was a question for future readers - if the novel ever got serialized.
Now, the real challenge was getting past the editor.
Ren took a deep breath.
"Alright. If I want to survive… I'll write. I'll become a light novel author."
A slight smile appeared on his lips.
This is the beginning of my story.
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