"...I am a vulgar and filthy woman. Say it three times."
Cheongwol's heart clenched tight, squeezing painfully.
It wasn't just her heart—something deeper inside felt crushed.
...It had begun.
This absurd game, starting all over again.
Cheongwol parted her lips to speak, then swallowed hard instead.
Her mind froze over.
Her breath came in quick gasps, her throat burning.
How...
How could she utter such words?
Cheongwol had never known a man.
She had never allowed any man's touch... not until Han Seojin.
Even when her senior brothers obsessed over women, Cheongwol had let their stories flow in one ear and out the other.
She held no interest in men, no curiosity at all.
Her goal had been too clear for that.
She had honed herself for the glory of the Emei Sect, to repay her sect leader's grace.
A chaste demeanor, refined poise.
She disliked the title of Emei Sect's Thousand-Year Flower, but still strove to live up to it.
And yet... he wanted her to say those words.
With her own mouth, no less.
"...You won't do it?"
In the end, Cheongwol rebelled from the very first command.
"...Why would I be... vulgar and... that kind of woman?"
Until now, she hadn't realized it, but through this revulsion, Cheongwol came to understand she had taken pride in her pure body.
Han Seojin remained unhurried.
" You're the one who came to me. You knew it would be humiliating. And yet you still wanted it... doesn't that make you a vulgar and filthy woman?"
"Have you forgotten... what kind of sect the Emei Sect is? No man has ever... touched my body before you. Do you want me to show you the Virgin Palace Mark... to prove it?"
The Virgin Palace Mark embedded in her forearm, proof of her purity.
Would showing that make him revoke the command?
"..."
Han Seojin stiffened briefly at her words, then rolled his neck with a short sigh before continuing.
"...Doesn't being vulgar have nothing to do with that? The truth is, you chose this perverse act. That hasn't changed. You even nodded in agreement just now."
"I... I'm not vulgar. Or filthy."
"So... you won't say it?"
"...No."
Han Seojin still seemed composed, even then.
"In SM play... do you know what happens when the sub doesn't obey?"
"..."
"...You give them punishment."
"...What?"
Han Seojin's voice turned cold.
"Stick out your ass. I'm going to spank it."
"...!"
Cheongwol reflexively clutched her backside and stumbled backward.
-Thud.
But soon she hit the basement wall.
There was no room to escape.
Unpredictable words always came from his mouth.
A spanking? She wasn't some child.
No grown adult would allow another adult to do that.
Yet, for some inexplicable reason, Cheongwol's breathing quickened too.
Chilling sensations were already overtaking her.
She kept swallowing dryly, her heartbeat thundering in her ears.
"...No..."
Cheongwol said cautiously.
She hated both options.
"...I don't want that either. How could I let a man touch my body like..."
Han Seojin stood frozen for a moment, then turned his body.
He pointed to the basement door.
"...Then leave. I don't need a woman who won't obey."
Somehow, this made Cheongwol the desperate one.
"...Ugh! Just lower the intensity a little...!"
"I decide the intensity. Your only job is to obey."
"..."
She knew he wasn't wrong.
Cheongwol knew it too.
That's why she had come. To obey his commands.
She knew liberation awaited at the end, so she wanted it.
Besides, he kept giving her a choice. If she didn't want to, she could leave anytime.
This was exactly that moment.
Yet Cheongwol's feet stayed glued to the floor.
Complex emotions beyond the shame kept calling to her.
All the stimulation was just one step away, but Cheongwol couldn't move forward.
Han Seojin slowly approached her, the one clutching her ass and backing away.
She could hardly believe she felt tense around the Leather Room's owner.
Pinning her against the wall, Han Seojin stood right in front of her, looking down.
Cheongwol couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes, so she stared only at his throat.
"...It's just me here."
At that moment, he whispered soothingly.
"...Only I know your true self. No one else will."
"Th-that's why I'm not that kind of person...!"
"...Admit it here. You don't have to outside. Just here, to me alone."
"..."
Cheongwol squeezed her eyes shut.
"...Cheongwol."
A gentle voice.
Her heart fluttered again.
"...Last time I called you a vulgar whore, you liked it."
"Eek!"
-Thud!
Cheongwol couldn't withstand his pressure and finally shoved him away.
No.
That's not it.
Those tears back then... weren't from joy.
They were from... too much shame, too much humiliation...
But Han Seojin didn't give up.
He closed the distance again.
Stood before her once more.
"Say it."
He pressed her.
"It's not hard. Just one phrase. No, four words."
Was that why? Because of his pressure?
Her lips began to quiver between the resistance.
A subtle tingling stirred deep in her belly.
She knew she had to say it, but her mouth wouldn't open.
A single line that would end it all, yet it hovered like a blade over her pride, training, and beliefs.
"...Say it to me alone."
Cheongwol drew a trembling breath.
Those words weren't just a declaration of shame.
Once spoken, things could never go back to how they were.
Somehow, that declaration would change everything.
An act of breaking the mental boundary she cherished. Something she mustn't do.
Teetering on that precarious line, Cheongwol kept hesitating.
****
It hurts like hell!!
Hot pain surged from where Cheongwol had shoved my chest.
Is my bone broken? I almost screamed at first.
But I couldn't open my mouth.
The moment I rolled around groaning in pain, all the atmosphere and acting I'd built up would crumble.
A sadist stripped of dignity could never reclaim this position.
I understood my unique situation.
Hadn't Cheongwol said it herself? I was the only one who'd touched her body.
Hearing that, I realized what kind of beast I was handling.
I was raising a wild animal as a pet. Fail to feed it, and it'd devour me.
Lose my mysterious authority or sadist position here... and would Cheongwol let me live?
I was the only one who'd seen her shameful side, the only one who'd lightly touched her body.
...I probably wouldn't survive.
I could picture a future of being treated like a cockroach and dying screaming.
So I gritted my teeth and pressed her again.
"Say it. It's not hard. Just one phrase. No, four words."
"...Hng... Hnng..."
"...Say it to me alone."
That was a cushion word.
A cushion, and a way to elevate my position.
A crucial device, forcing her to speak to me.
I'd told her to stick out her ass if she couldn't, but of course I had no intention of actually spanking it.
How could I?
If I did, it wouldn't just be Cheongwol's problem—the Emei Sect Leader herself might hunt me down in fury.
This was pure induction.
To raise the intensity beyond last time, I had to build it slowly, step by step.
Warm-up was essential.
If I chugged two bottles of soju right after my previous record, I'd puke after one and ruin everything.
I needed to ease soft broth into Cheongwol's stomach first.
Only when she let herself go could we move to the next stage.
But inside, I was fuming.
I hadn't expected a block here.
If she couldn't even do this, why come at all?!
If you can't, then leave!! I don't want to either!!
But no matter how many hints I dropped, she ignored them like a spoiled seven-year-old, refusing to budge.
Not doing it but throwing a tantrum.
I had no idea how to handle this.
Damn it, seriously.
"..."
...If she can't, I'll have to lead her.
I set this game, so I have to take responsibility for this relationship.
"...You really can't say it?"
Cheongwol nodded immediately, as if truly unable.
When the sub struggles with the whip, you offer the carrot. That's basic.
I had to spit out something cringeworthy.
"...If you say it, you'll look so pretty."
"Eek...!"
Cheongwol shrank back.
Her nape and ears were already red.
Her reaction made sense. Who hates praise?
Plus, for a woman awkward around men, where would she hear such earnest compliments? Maybe casual greetings or passing remarks, but this was like a lover's words. Even I struggled.
"..."
"..."
But that was it.
Her lips remained firmly shut.
...Of course.
I hadn't expected it to work.
This only flies between lovers.
Our bond isn't tight enough for my praise to be her carrot.
Time to rethink.
What could serve as her carrot?
What had I used to prod her last time?
...Right, her burdens and pressures as weapons.
I racked my brain and spoke to the rigid Cheongwol.
"...Think about it."
"...?"
Cheongwol glanced up at me.
Her eyes seemed even more glistening.
"...These are words you can only say here. Words you couldn't say anywhere else."
"..."
"When the Central Plains calls you the Emei Sect's Thousand-Year Flower... you whisper here that you're not. That you're a filthy, vulgar woman. Nothing special compared to others. That you take joy in humiliating acts from a mere Leather Room owner."
"...I didn't... like it... I told you..."
A reaction.
Did Cheongwol realize? She'd just held her breath.
"You're letting go of all expectations. Admitting a side even your sect leader doesn't know... only to me. Doesn't that feel freeing...? I won't tell a soul. Say it to me. Show me alone. That you're not so different from an ordinary person."
"...Hoo..."
"Everyone has sexual desires. It's not weird. Everyone needs release. Those who claim otherwise are just wearing masks."
I suppressed my trembling hand and gently ran my fingers through her hair like combing silk.
Cheongwol subtly turned her head, rejecting my touch.
"Even as an Emei Sect nun, that doesn't change. I'll accept your lewd side. I'll praise it."
Her upper body swayed faintly.
This one offer alone made her act dizzy.
I brought my mouth close to her ear.
And whispered.
"...Last chance. If you don't say it now... I'll spank your ass."
"..."
"...Or is this because you want the spanking?"
Up close, Cheongwol's body trembled ever so slightly.
I swallowed, tense as well.
Would she say it in the end?
Or not?
Had I gotten carried away? Pushed too far?
But I had to admit a shallow greed stirring in me too.
Beyond cushions, I wanted to see the lofty Emei Sect's Thousand-Year Flower whisper such lewd words.
I wanted to hear this beauty say them herself.
My sadist desires had begun writhing at some point.
"..."
Yet Cheongwol didn't open her mouth this time either.
Despite waiting ages, nothing.
I had to slowly accept it.
...It wasn't happening.
If there'd been a safeword, it would've come out already.
Fine.
Let's end here today.
Time to switch to polite speech and wrap up—
-Swish.
Then, a tentative hand grasped my sleeve.
Cheongwol clutched me, as if summoning courage.
As if I, tormenting her, was the only one she could rely on right now.
I froze, observing her movement.
For some reason, I couldn't move.
Cheongwol's lips trembled open, oh so slowly.
Her eyes remained shut.
Echoing my whisper to her ear, she breathed words barely audible to mine.
"...I..."
Her moist breath wetted my ear.
-Ooh...
Goosebumps prickled my arm at her voice.
"...I am..."
A long pause, as if the words stuck.
But then, gathering courage again, her mouth opened.
Words whispered by a woman raised ignorant of men.
"...A... cheap...! ...vulgar and..."
I turned my head slightly to watch her expression.
"...filthy..."
Cheongwol's eyes cracked open faintly.
Beneath eyes brimming with deep revulsion...
...A fleeting glimmer of pleasure.
"...woman."
She said, turning her head away.
"...There. Happy now."
Only then could I be certain.
I knew from that brief glimpse in her eyes.
It was crystal clear.
...Cheongwol was a masochist.
Or rather, she was someone who craved shame.
Someone who loved the depravity it brought.
"..."
That realization made my heart race wildly for some reason.
I released the pressure on her and turned away.
I'd planned the entire session for today, but my mind went blank.
What was I going to do next?
And why was I so shocked?
Why was my heart pounding like this?
They say your heart races when you find someone with the same kink. Was that it?
But with Cheongwol of all people?
Strangely, the fear I'd constantly felt seemed to fade a bit now.
I took a step to regain composure.
-Thud.
Cheongwol's hand caught my turning back.
"...Hm...?"
"...What?"
Cheongwol looked at me, struggling with self-loathing.
The Cheongwol who never leaned on anyone asked me.
"...The praise...?"
As if pleading not to leave her so pathetically alone.