I got a bonus at work.
I plan to spoil my wife.
I come home with flowers and her favorite chocolates.
I wake up the wife and give her the gifts.
She looks surprised.
I hug the wife.
I tell the wife that we are going out to eat. So, she goes upstairs to get ready.
She comes back down two minutes later.
I tell her to go back upstairs and change her clothes.
She asks me "why?"
I tell her that she can't wear pajamas to a restaurant.
She sighs and goes upstairs.
She comes back down 25 minutes later.
Wife is beautiful.
I hug wife.
Wife blushes.
I kiss wife.
I drive me and wife to fancy restaurant.
Wife eats chocolates I gave her in the passenger seat.
We arrive at restaurant.
We sit down and I look at menu.
I tell wife to order what she wants.
She tries to order chicken nuggets…
I remind wife we are not poor.
Wife ended up getting mac-and-cheese with cheesecake for dessert.
Wife is happy.
I am happy that wife is happy.
I see a man glance at wife.
I go excuse myself from wife.
I come back 15 minutes later.
I wipe the red off my sleeve so wife doesn't worry.
I smile at wife.
Wife looks suspicious of me.
I show wife the wine I ordered while I was gone.
Wife drinks the wine…
I end up having to carry the drunken wife to bed that night.