"What is this? This place? My head seriously hurts."
But I don't feel it.
It's strange that it feels nothing more than a long nap, yet I felt I did wake up whilst I slept.
"How long did I sleep? And..."
"Am I really awake... ? Why?"
The fluorescent lights are staining my eyes. I can't close them, nor can I open them.
"Eak!"
I hadn't noticed but I see a strange girl, shrieked by my presence.
So strange. Who is she? I tried to get a glimpse of her but she had fled before I could tell.
"who was that strange girl? ... She looked so ... Painful to glance at ..."
I really shouldn't be bothered by it. I'll just continue staring at the ring on the ceiling. That's probably what I could think of.
Just then. Gasps "Kira?? Y-you're awake! It's real! G-god!" says a middle aged looking lady.
"She's awake! Good grief!" followed along by a young lady, who seems to be dressed in a blue-ish green apron. It didn't look as staining to my eyes.
Then a doctor approached me and asked. "Hello? Can you hear me? What is your name?"
"My s-sparkle!" the lady whines as the nurse attempts to stop her from getting any closer to tug me.
"Ma'am you need to calm down for now" she pulls her aback.
The doctor continue to interrogate me. "Can you hear me? What is your name?"
I can't remember
"H-her hearing senses seems to be working and also she is observing so it should be a-"
"I know I know. So can you tell me your name?" he cuts off the nurse. "Please let me finish! Will you?"
Then out of nowhere my lips instinctively moved. "Kira" I spoke. Barely up a whisper.
"She seems to remember her name. She's good" he continues with a stoic tone. "we'll still need to examine her head to check for any exceptions. You can talk to her and try reminding her of things that she would definitely remember."
"KIRA THANK GOODNESS!" she launches to me.
The other lady smiles softly at us. "Kira get well soon alright! We'll help you with your problems so be ready to tell us."
The one hugging me sobs and sniffles. "I can't love you any less. Even if you forge-."
"Ahem ma'am you're not supposed to," the doctor interrupts her.
"Sorry docter I got carried away," she moves aback to find a certain nostalgia in my eyes then continues to hug me, even tighter than before.
But who are they. "uhh uh-mm," why are they so happy.
After what felt like an eternity of cuddling and hugging she finally let me go and I just rest on the bed with nothing but ... But what?
"Ouh Kira we missed you so so much. We always prayed for you every night and every day, after waking up and before sleeping, before and even after meals. God helped us at last. You we're finally awake. Please don't ever do that again." the lady sobs.
"the light is flickering a bit faster than before. It would've been painfully pleasant if I could sleep right now."
"Did you know June had been waiting for you to wake up ever since you fell. She wouldn't leave the room even if she had to go to the washroom. She says that she has something important to say to you. Probably something like "get well soon" or "I love you" heh"
"love?"
"Y-yes dear? Do you need anything? Tell me and I'll bring it to you! Oh wait let me call June! She would be excited to see you back again." She leaves the room to call for her.
"June? It echoes so much in my head... My head hurts..."
The lady brings up that strange girl. Yet again, I feel like the ring light is flickering a bit too much.
June almost afraid of me. Struggles to flee from the lady's hold.
"June what is this behaviour. Your long awaited sister is awake." she scolds her off but still tries to get away from the room.
What sweet scent. It's soothing. Rose or honeysuckle?
I saw something strange. Those fragrance. It has been here before. Even before I woke up, or fell asleep.
"J-june!"
My heart stopped for a moment. I smiled and cried. Why does it feel hopeful. But I'm standing at the ledge of a cliff. Trying to grab the clouds. I know I can't get hold of it. Yet still.
"..."
She stops moving. And breaks down into tears in seconds, then rushes to me instead of fleeing and sniffs and sobs all over my clothes.
I could not contain myself either. I return the hug. It's uncomfortably relaxing. Maybe if I was a little taller I could grab those clouds. Maybe then I could smell those flowers for as long as I could remember.
___
Somewhere in the forest, the Honeysuckle could bloom. The Rose could shed it's petals.
It would then be the Rose only recognised by what's beside it. What would the color of it be?
___
June fell asleep on my lap. I softly twist her hair strands around. It feels oddly normal. But she was a total stranger.
My dimlit eyes get caught on a sheet of paper in her fist.
I pulls it out and ...
["I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm sorry Imm soory in sorrv I'm sorrryy immn sovry..."]
The paper was damp but not old. I could tell it was freshly written. My head starts to hurt again.
"What is this? This word? Why does it read more than it's written? Am I going insane?"
"..."
"Why would I be at the roof right now? Who is she? Why is she holding me on?"
"DON'T DO THIS TO ME! I... I... WANT YOU TO LIVE!"
"Why. Just why. Could you stop? Please let me go. You don't understand me enough to hold me out."
"But... But I love you. E-evrrwone duss. Ev-reythngg will be alrraigt..."
"I feel so heavy. My back is... Empty. The stars are gazing back at me. My father. He's calling me."
"Plliease stayy"
"Please let me go... I'm tired... No... It's not that... I'm... I can't remember why it happened... But it's too late... Please... Please... Please... Please... PLEA-"
"Kira! Would you like some warm choco shake? It's your favourite drink right?" a sharp recent voice.
I forget what I was thinking about for a second.
"...S-sure"
"I'm scared. But why? I can't think straight at all. Who was she?"
She hands me the drink. "I hope you two had a good talk when I left to get you things? What did you two talk about? Something lovey dovey? She missed you so bad. She couldn't sleep properly too. She must've been so tired she fell asleep right on your lap. Silly little girl."
I take the choco shake.
"It's so bland. And brown. Feels like something really calming," My hands were shaking a bit too much so I didn't try lifting the cup.
"Do you need a hand? Let me help you take a sip"
The lady proceeds to help me sip the choco shake. Might've spilled a little on my clothes. Good thing it didn't fall on June.
"... Tastes like brown."
The cup is half empty now so it's lighter to hold up by myself.
"... Brown..."
The lady sighs at me, "By the way, did you know Ju-"
"RINNG RINNGG"
I flinched
It was her phone that rang. "urgh it's your dad! He didn't come to see you in the first place and now he's disturbing us with his calls."
"... Dad? ..."
I got lost in thoughts yet again. The hot choco slips off my hand and falls on the floor. Gladly, it didn't touch June.
Before I knew she takes the call and leaves the room.
"wait... Wait..." Barely audible. She couldn't hear me.
It was too noisy...
...
Yet again it was me and June alone.
...
June is still sleeping on my lap. She looked so pleasant, not more than an infants first sleep. What went wrong that she had to plead with dying sorry's?
I sweep her bangs out of the view. What did you do to yourself?... She slowly opened her eyes and met with mine until she was fully awake and observing around.
I pointed at the hot choco on the floor.
June unhesitantly understands what to do, cleans it off and served me another cup of hot choco but she dips a marshmello in it.
She really doesn't say anything and just smiles softly with desperately pleading eyes.
"... Looks like the same brown but I see a moon. Bright white. Sinking into the dirt. Floating and swimming for its life."
___
The voices calm down to an echo. No thoughts were left on my eyes. Just the dirty pure levitate to my foggy view.
___