Bao Ji (Lia)
I didn't even have time to properly wake up when my maid rushed into my room, breathless, saying that some servants had heard shouting coming from the court.
Brilliant.
Still half-asleep, I rushed toward the court. But the moment I arrived in front of the doors, I stopped. All the officials were inside.
I took two steps back and leaned against the wall next to the entrance.
How am I supposed to go in?
I have no right to be there.
I can't just jump in like a monkey into water.
I could be punished for entering. I could be punished for trying to calm him.
God. What should I do?
Until now, I hadn't overthought it. I had just acted.
"You are questioning my decisions now?" the Emperor roared.
The moment I heard that, without thinking, I went inside.
The instant I stepped through the doors, the noise stopped completely.
Every eye turned toward me.
The silence was so heavy it felt like the air itself had tightened.
His Majesty was standing, while the Queen was seated beside the Emperor's seat. His hands were clenched tightly against the edge of the table, his knuckles white.
When I reached the kneeling official, I looked straight into His Majesty's eyes.
Without looking away, I said, "Your Majesty."
My tone was firm.
"Concubine Ji," the Emperor replied, releasing the table and straightening his back.
He tried to look away, as if that would help him avoid my gaze. He looked like a child about to be scolded.
My tongue itched to actually scold him—but there were too many officials present. And nothing guaranteed that I wouldn't be punished for this.
"Your Majesty?" I asked again.
He knew exactly what I wanted—an explanation for the shouting.
"Well…" he started. He sat down, then continued, "It is something important we are discussing."
"And?" I asked.
I could hear whispers behind my back, but I forced myself not to react. Not yet.
The Emperor looked at me, puzzled. "And…?"
I rolled my eyes and took a breath.
Looking straight into his eyes, I asked, "And that means you have to shout? Can't you speak calmly?"
What am I doing?
I am questioning a fucking emperor in front of officials.
I must be out of my mind.
"Well… I suppose I could be more patient," he said.
"That's good, then," I replied. "I hope His Majesty will stick to that."
I bowed. At the same time, I said, "I will take my leave now. I don't wish to disturb His Majesty."
But he stopped me.
"Wait."
Just let me go, for the love of God.
"You can stay. Come here," he said.
"What?" I stared at him, shocked.
"Your Majesty, this goes against protocol," one official said, and others immediately supported him.
Honestly, I agreed with them.
I had no place here. I wasn't the queen.
I looked at Her Highness, silently begging her to back me up—to send me away.
Instead, she gestured for me to come stand beside her.
What did I get myself into?
Without a word, I walked over and stood next to the Queen.
When I turned to face the officials, my legs almost gave out.
So many eyes.
Only then did it fully hit me what I had just done.
"So. Let us continue," His Majesty said.
I had just walked into a court full of officials and questioned the Emperor's behaviour.
What is wrong with me?
This is his territory.
I have no right to question a fucking emperor.
My anxiety exploded.
My heart started racing faster and faster. My breathing became shallow and frantic—like a fish out of water. The voices around me blurred until I couldn't understand a single word.
My hands began to shake. I did everything I could to hide it.
I forced myself to look calm.
But my emotions were rising too fast. I couldn't focus on anything.
I looked at the Queen at the exact same moment she looked at me.
"Are you okay?" she whispered.
I shook my head slightly.
I needed to get out.
As soon as possible.
Suddenly, the Emperor slammed his palm against the table.
I took a step forward instinctively and looked at him.
He noticed me immediately.
He gave me a side glance, cleared his throat, and visibly tried to rein himself in—to behave.
After thirty minutes, everything ended.
The officials looked relieved to see the Emperor calm and patient again—but unhappy about my presence.
I didn't want to be there either.
Because I was holding my emotions back so tightly, I hadn't heard a single word of what had been discussed. I was barely aware of my own heartbeat.
No—actually, even that felt distant.
After the officials left, only the Queen, the Emperor, and I remained.
I stepped forward until I stood a foot away from the table.
Then I dropped to my knees.
Bowing deeply, I said, "I apologise, Your Majesty. I should not have entered the court or spoken to you like that in front of the officials. I overstepped my boundaries. You may punish me."
I had overstepped.
Even if I calmed him down, I was still wrong.
I waited for the punishment.
The Emperor stood up and walked toward me.
He gently pulled me to my feet.
"Why should I punish you?" he said. "You helped me calm down and see things more clearly."
His hands were still on my arms.
I stared at him, shocked.
He…
He really isn't punishing me?
"But—" I started.
"It's okay," he cut in. "Don't worry."
I looked at the Queen, speechless.
No.
No.
No.
This can't be real.
This means that no matter the situation, I can calm him.
It means I have no boundaries.
What the hell—
I need to leave.
Now.
"Your Majesty," the Queen said, stepping forward, "I would like to take Lady Ji with me. There are things we need to discuss."
When did she get so close to me?
The Emperor barely acknowledged her. His eyes stayed on me.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yes. Yes, I'm fine," I replied quickly. "Just a little surprised."
More like completely fucking shaken.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," I answered shortly.
"I won't keep you from the Queen," he said, smiling. "You may go."
The Queen and I left immediately.
"You look as pale as a ghost," she said as we walked. "What's wrong?"
"Let's just get to your room first," I replied.
The moment we entered her chambers, she ordered all the servants out and closed the door.
I couldn't hold it anymore.
My knees hit the floor. My hands shook violently as I hyperventilated.
"What's wrong?" the Queen asked, kneeling in front of me.
"How did I calm him in court?" I gasped. "He didn't punish me for overstepping. How is that even possible?"
I shook my head, unable to process it.
She took my hands in hers.
"Try to calm down first," she said gently.
"Calm down?" I nearly shouted. "Calm down?! This is too much!"
I broke down.
"I can ground him. Calm him. He listens to me. If I tell him what to do, he does it—without question. How am I supposed to calm down?"
Tears streamed down my face.
"He's not a child. Not a friend. Not family. He's the Emperor. One wrong sentence from me and everything could be destroyed. Do you understand that?"
My chest tightened painfully. I rocked slightly, trying to breathe.
"What if I cause harm in court? No. No. This is too much."
Suddenly, arms wrapped tightly around me.
"I'm here," the Queen whispered. "You're not alone."
Her hug was firm and grounding.
The chaos inside me was overwhelming.
I hadn't taken over Bao Ji's body for this.
This is too much—even for me.
I can't do this, Bao Ji.
"I know you can," I heard Bao Ji say softly. "I'm here too."
She isn't gone.
She's still inside.
"Bao Ji," I whispered mentally. "You're back?"
No answer.
"Bao Ji?" I tried again.
Still nothing.
It made me sad—but knowing she was still there gave me comfort.
I gently pulled away from the queen and wiped my tears.
Then a horrifying thought struck me.
If Bao Ji is still inside somewhere… We didn't fully merge as I initially thought. She could come back at any time.
She could push me back into the twenty-first century.
The thought made my chest tighten again.
I tried not to dwell on it—but I couldn't stop.
I miss my world.
I miss Elena.
I miss my parents.
But knowing I'm the only one who can calm him…
It makes me want to stay.
But this body is Bao Ji's.
If she comes back—will the Emperor notice?
Oh God.
Everything is tangled beyond understanding.
"Concubine Ji?" the Queen said, offering me a cup of water. "Drink."
I took it and swallowed.
"How do you feel now?" she asked gently. "Have you calmed down?"
I stared at her, unable to answer.
I had calmed down—but my worries had doubled.
No. Tripled.
"I—" I started.
Suddenly, everything went black.