Kevin was sitting in his dark room and it smelled like stale Doritos and pure desperation. His RGB keyboard was flashing red like a warning sign but Kevin didn't care because he was locked in. He was literally the Goon King of the Midwest.
On his screen was 'Conquering Demon Queen as an Academy Student' and the graphics were insane, the jiggle physics were set to 400% which Kevin had modded himself.
"Oh god," Kevin wheezed, his eyes bloodshot and dry because he hadn't blinked in forty minutes. "This is it. The Level 99 Gyatt."
He had been edging for three days straight. No sleep. Just Mountain Dew and determination. His right arm was throbbing, bigger than his left arm like that guy from Left 4 Dead. The friction was reaching critical mass. It was like rubbing two sticks together to start a fire but the sticks were made of meat and the fire was his libido.
"I can't... give... up..." he gritted his teeth.
On the screen, the Elf Princess did a backflip. It was too much.
Kevin's grip tightened. It was the Death Grip technique he learned on Reddit. He pulled back with the force of a thousand suns, preparing for the legendary release. He yanked. He yanked harder than he had ever yanked before.
SNAP.
It wasn't a wet sound. It was a dry, loud pop like a chicken bone breaking.
Kevin froze. The room went silent except for the sound of the Elf Princess giggling on the speakers.
Kevin looked down at his hand. He was holding something. It looked familiar. It looked very familiar.
"Huh?" Kevin said, his brain buffering. "Why is my... why is it in my hand?"
He looked at his crotch. There was nothing there. Just a smooth, angry red patch where his manhood used to be. He had literally pulled it off. He had gooned too close to the sun and ripped his own joystick right out of the console.
"Wait," Kevin whispered, holding his detached member like a broken microphone. "Is this bad?"
For exactly three seconds, nothing happened. It was like Wile E. Coyote running off a cliff before gravity realized he was there.
Then, the pressure hit.
WHOOSH.
A fountain of blood erupted from his crotch like the Bellagio water show but red. It hit the ceiling fan. Splatter splatter splatter. The room looked like a Quentin Tarantino movie instantly.
"Oh no," Kevin said, feeling very lightheaded. "My mom is gonna be so mad about the carpet."
His vision went blurry. The RGB lights spun. He tried to put it back on like a Lego piece but his hands were too slippery with his own life fluids.
He slumped forward, his face landing on the keyboard.
W-A-S-T-E-D.
Kevin died as he lived: horny, confused, and holding his own destiny in his hand.
[SYSTEM MESSAGE: CONDITIONS MET.]
[YOU HAVE DIED!]
[CAUSE OF DEATH: EXTREME PENILE AVULSION.]
[UNLOCKING HIDDEN CLASS...]
.
.
.
[A/N: Obviously, this is a smut novel. No cap. Tons and tons of smut. Every chapter dripping with it. So, turn your damn brains off. This is a power-fantasy smut novel, by a degenerate, for degenerates. Just enjoy it. Stroke your little brother responsibly.]