Sooo... I was sitting in class during break period—not reading, just staring at my book, trying my best to mind my business as grandma said my ass hole of a mouth would get me in trouble someday.
I guess I inherited that from her cuz her audacity was pretty rough, but since it was her last request, I have to pay the respect.
But let's not talk about how hard it is.
The loud boys of our class walked in, laughing like worn-out engines.
"Bro that goal was as Super as Superman."
One of the boys bluffed
"Hmph" the sound sorta left my mouth involuntarily.
I squeezed my shorts, I guess I reacted to my hearing, but that was a bit too loud.
"Anything wrong, Mr Trubbing Tongue?
Yeah, of course, I already had a nickname; this had really become a habit I don't wanna show today, especially to a bunch of dumb Superman fans.
I took deep breaths and calmed myself, then said,
"Superman isn't as Super as you think he is."
Fuck!, My mouth just keeps on running and running, I don't know when I talk, but I guess they were buying the conversation.
They looked at each other and laughed.
Troy, leader of the laughing gas boys or so I call them, bent low to reach my gaze.
"That guy took all DC members in one shot, you know?"
Okay, things were getting interesting for me too, because I could talk about this all day!
I raised an eyebrow and looked at him, "That was after a DC content creator saw how much of a wasted potential he was and had to kill him, then revamp his ass."
Troy's group looked at each other like I was insane,
"Guys, can you hear him? Yo watch your tongue before the god comes down and strikes you to death."
I rolled my eyes, "Tell me, a god who knelt to a man, is that still a god?"
Troy waved his hands over my eyes, "Hello... We're talking about the strongest DC characters here."
I coughed abruptly like I just inhaled the strongest nuisances, "Superman? Strongest? You've gotta be kidding me, the bat of Gotham is!"
The laughing group of boys showed me how abundant their laughing gas was, to the extent that their feet stamped the floor.
"See, Mr Trubbing Tongue, I know you speak a lot, but I expected more from you. Bruce Wayne? Strongest? Ohh, don't even get me started, a punch from Superman and he's in a poster written: Gone Too Soon."
I scoffed, "he doesn't even need to take a punch."
The Troy guy raised an eyebrow and leaned closer to me, "So what? His gonna run to his dead parents with his paper jet, pissing in his pants? I guarantee you. Superman would walk and catch up to him."
I hissed, "Batman got peak foresight, tactics, martial arts, technology—"
"And let's counter all that with Superman's strength."
Ugly Troy cut me off speech. I bit my lips, nodding while looking around the class, at least that was true to some extent but...
"You know one problem I've got with Superman fans and himself? You guys have no shame, like, why would a Kryptonian run from his planet to come measure shoulders with a human? He should go raise his dick in Krypton if they wouldn't end his generations there and then."
Troy slammed his hand into my desk, almost biting blood out of his lips. He leaned closer to me, almost like he wanted to scream at my soul.
"So you're running from the bat to Kryptonians now?"
I pushed his face away while laughing softly, "The bats don't run, remember, your so-called god was at the verge of death in our hands before he resorted to his mother's name to save him?
Or should I remind you?
Check the second hour of the eleventh minute at the forty-two second of "Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice"
Should I also remind you when Superman was dragged with chains like a rag doll?"
I was so much on a high vibe that I didn't notice the air became steamy hot.
For a second, I looked at the faces around me; none seemed to be smiling. They looked more like ranging bulls than humans now.
I didn't think this would go any further, so I purred, "See another problem I have with you and your role model? You guys just can't keep your emotions in your pocket, you always keep on spraying it like insecticide, whereas you're the insects it's killing."
By this time, I had long forgotten about my grandma's last wish, but I pray she forgives me.
The thing is that, if debate were a profession, I would have been a multi-billionaire by now but with the grin on these guys' faces, I don't think they're gonna be paying my service with cash
"Okay guys, you'll need to calm down, be brave and face the true reality unlike your quack in disguise Super—"
My words died to the feeling of a sharp pain in the back of my neck. I couldn't move, couldn't cry, nor could I call for help.
The real pain was that this might be my last debate and the opposing team chose violence over submission.
I fell to the floor as my vision blurred and my hearing faded.
The last things I heard were the sound of my dripping blood and Grandma's voice....
Well, I didn't hear what she said, but I'm sure she was scolding me for the end my mouth had brought me to.
Pathetic Superman and fans.
Cold... silence....cold again and then deeper silence
Okay, something different now, the sound of a motorcycle, almost smooth as a melody.
I'm supposed to be dead, but I felt pain in my head, like, since when did corpses start having headaches and who damn knows if there's some kinda drug to cure it.
I subconsciously reached for my head, but the fuck, I'm moving!
Okay, how about opening my eyes?
It... it damn fucken worked.
Fuck what I wanna believe, but the reality here is that I'm sitting in Batman's bike, got his memories, wearing his suit and look, a bad guy is hanging upside-down just meters behind me in some backyard while car horns blew in the distance.
So like, I'm in DC, I'm Batman and suit, but damn, I could have come earlier to kick this guy's ass myself.
But wait, I think I get it... I was in a debate and the universe wants me to back it up with proof.
Haha... okay I will.
But truth be told, Superman is too much power packed in one flesh, and if I'm gonna do better than Bruce Wayne already did, I'll have to clear off his three mistakes.
First, have a complete A-Z backup plan before engaging in a direct contact fight, cuz that guy is crazy, he could die mid-fight and come back as the whole of the Avengers in one body that very instant.
Secondly, I'm not fighting a God the universe doesn't wanna eliminate without his emotional anchor held captive.
And lastly, I hope u can agree with me on this one, but for me, every big bat needs an ass—like a solid relationship that's not gonna have seasons for another girl to replace.
It's dangerous, though, but let's start by finding out if the Kryptonian has landed.