All of a sudden, the man hugged me so tightly that it may seem like either his or my life was in line.
'I think if this continues I will suffocate to death.'
Before I could ask the man to let me go I felt the feeling of something soaking my shirt around the shoulders. It wouldn't take a genius to realise that they were tears.
Seeing the man cry I froze for a moment, I was never really great at calming people during their bad times so I never tried to and I rarely cried so I never got to experience the feeling of being comforted. That resulted in me not knowing how to give comfort to people for the rest of my life. After thinking what others usually did to others I tried copying the actions so, I hugged the man and rubbed circles on his back trying to calm him down.
The doctor sat there not interfering but still curious for his unanswered questions.
As I hugged the man, memories again flew into my head.
_______________
Again,the boy that had jet black hair and a white lock of hair but with lesser white this time, was running happily around a hallway as the man hugging him walked behind him watching the little child run around with a smile tell the kid not to fall down.
"Dad! Come catch me." The kid who looked to be around 5 shouted.
_________________
"Dad?"
'why did I say that out aloud?!'
"I-I am sorry, I am sorry. " The man mumbled over and over.
I now recognised the man. He was the one who always came around midnight to just sit beside me when I was unconscious. The person who called me his son.
"It's not your fault." I answered. Even tho I don't know what happened I am pretty sure it's not something that they did.
"I am sorry, I wasn't able to be a good and caring father to you." The man apologized again.
"So, you're my father?"
...
'Oh! Shit. Oh my dear soul'
And that's how I knew that I ------ up.
Both men froze at my words. The man hugging me pulled away from the hug and looked at the doctor with questions written on his face, but the doctor was no better. The poor man looked like his soul just left his body.
"Do you not remember anything?" The doctor asked.
"I- I "
'What did you do you f--king m-r-n'
"If I may ask, how much do you remember?" The doctor asked.
'D-mn it'
____________
As night fell, stillness flowed through the air. The windows were closed and the curtains were drawn, but still a few rays of moonlight sliped through.
I opened my eyes, looking around I walked up to the door silently, putting my ear against it to make sure no one was around.
After making sure there was no one around, I lit up the room as I looked for something really important.
After a long search I found it.
A mirror.
It was a full sized mirror covered by a cloth and was kept in the corner of the room beside a dressing table.
'Why do I have a dressing table? Maybe rich people like dressing themselves alot.'
' Now for the moment of truth.'
I looked into the mirror and stared at it for a while, staring at the face looking back at me through the mirror. At that time I could only think of one thing.
'How beautiful! '
It was indeed the boy that was in those memories.
The boy had long jet black hair with a lock of white. A pretty beautiful face. Big eyes but not to big to look weird and cheeks plumped with baby fat.
The only way to describe the face was beautiful.
"Why am I beautiful and not handsome?"
I am pretty sure the little guy is still down there so I am indeed a guy but I looked like a girl.
"I can just hope that this beauty will grow up to be a handsome charming young manly man."
Now for the real question.
Is this temporary or permanent?