Shion stared at the giant obsidian doors in front of them.
Each slab was carved with glowing circuit-veins, pulsing like a heartbeat. The air hummed with static, mana, and… suspiciously free coffee smell.
Raon bounced on her heels.
"Okay, Shion. What's behind this door? Tell me it's not another Trial Subscription Worm. I already kicked its Premium Features into the trash."
Shion squinted at her tablet.
"Uh… okay. So—according to System Map version 3.1.9.4A… this is definitely the Boss Room."
"Yesss." Raon cracked her knuckles. "Time to kick something big."
"However," Shion added, "it says we can't enter until we—"
The doors vibrated.
A massive glowing textbox appeared:
ENTER WI-FI PASSWORD TO PROCEED.
Network: BossRoom_5G_Ultra
Security Level: Divine WPA3+++
Hint: 'My greatest weakness.'
Attempts remaining: 1
Raon frowned.
"Why does a boss need WiFi?"
Shion rubbed her temple.
"Maybe the boss streams its own theme song? I don't know. Abyss dungeons are built stupid."
Raon marched confidently to the textbox.
"Easy. Its greatest weakness is—"
Shion dove and grabbed her wrist.
"STOP! You can't just guess!"
Raon blinked. "But I want to guess."
"One wrong input and the system will lock us out and initiate Ultra-Security Mode."
Raon tilted her head. "Is that a good mode?"
"No. It spawns weapons that can actually kill you. Not just annoy you—kill you."
Raon gasped dramatically.
"…So like Legos on the floor?"
"Worse."
"Worse than Legos…?"
Raon shuddered. "Okay, okay, fine. Let's think."
Shion gazed up at the massive doors.
"My greatest weakness…"
She activated scan-mode.
Lines of encrypted metadata streamed by.
Error flags. Corrupted personality logs. Debug notes. Old patch versions.
Then she saw it.
A repeating line:
BUG REPORT 00452: Boss constantly distracted by watching 'Top 10 Dungeon Fails' videos at work.
Suggested fix: BLOCK video sites. Developer refused.
Shion covered her mouth.
"Oh my god."
Raon leaned in. "What? What did you see? Is it secretly weak to being kicked in the shins? Because I can kick shins."
"No." Shion coughed. "Raon… I think the boss's weakness is…"
She whispered:
"…Procrastination."
Raon snapped her fingers. "Of course! I knew it. I felt a kindred spirit."
"That's not something to be proud of—"
Raon typed confidently:
P R O C R A S T I N A T I O N
The textbox blinked.
One second.
Two seconds.
Three—
ACCESS GRANTED.
The giant doors slid open with a divine groan, releasing a wave of neon fog.
Raon fist-pumped.
"LET'S GO! Shion, you're a genius. I'll buy you snacks later!"
"You say that every time," Shion muttered.
"But this time I mean it!"
"You say that every time too."
Inside, the fog parted, revealing a massive circular arena filled with floating server stacks, glowing runes, and a throne made of keyboards.
Correction:
Broken keyboards.
A giant figure sat slumped over the throne.
It wore an oversized robe stitched together from old error messages, and its face was concealed behind a cracked monitor-mask.
But its aura… was strong.
Too strong.
Raon whispered, "Boss fight rules: I punch it, you tell me more things to punch."
"Noted," Shion whispered.
The throne flickered.
The boss twitched.
It slowly lifted its head, the cracked monitor glowing awake.
A distorted voice boomed:
"O H. S O M E O N E E L S E C A M E T O D O M Y W O R K F O R M E."
Then, louder:
"I A M T H E B O S S O F B O S S E S —
T H E P R O C R A S T I N A T I O N D E M O N, 'D E L A Y L O R D.'"
Raon clenched her fist.
"Shion. I love him."
"Raon NO."
Delaylord groaned and stretched, bones crackling like old hard drives.
"W E L C O M E, I N T R U D E R S. I W A S S U P P O S E D T O B E R E A D Y F O R Y O U B U T…"
He yawned.
"I P U T I T O F F."
Raon's eyes shone with admiration.
"My people."
Shion pinched her nose.
"Can you please not emotionally adopt the eldritch cyber-demon?"
Delaylord pointed lazily at them.
"T O B E P E R F E C T L Y H O N E S T…
Y O U R A R R I V A L W A S S C H E D U L E D F O R N E X T W E E K."
Raon: "I love him MORE."
Shion: "RAON PLEASE."
Delaylord rose from the throne with the slow, dragging momentum of someone standing up only because the meeting is mandatory.
The arena rumbled.
"B U T F I N E. I ' L L F I G H T N O W."
A gigantic loading bar appeared above his head:
LOADING BOSS MOTIVATION… 3%
He froze.
Nothing moved.
The loading bar stayed at 3%.
Shion blinked.
"…Is he lagging?"
Raon waved her hand. "Hey! Boss guy! You stuck?"
Delaylord didn't react.
Shion scanned data. "…No lag. He's… uh… thinking about whether to actually fight us."
Raon nodded sagely.
"So he's procrastinating AGAIN."
Shion sighed loudly.
"Why is everything in this abyss emotionally relatable to you?!"
Delaylord's screen-face flickered back to life.
"A L R I G H T. I H A V E D E C I D E D."
The arena lights flared.
"L E T ' S B E G I N T H E B A T T L E O F A T R O C I O U S D E L A Y."
Raon grinned.
Shion tightened her grip on her tablet.
Delaylord raised both arms—
And several floating orbs materialized, each labeled:
"DELAY TASK"
"PENDING RESPONSIBILITY"
"OVERDUE ASSIGNMENT"
"REPLY TO EMAIL"
Raon whispered, horrified:
"Shion… this boss is strong. That last one… truly monstrous."
Shion whispered back, "Don't look directly at the email orb."
The orbs began chasing them like hungry homing pigeons.
Raon screamed, "AAAAAAAH WHY IS THE EMAIL ONE FASTEST?!"
"Because it senses fear!"
"SHION HELP!"
"I AM HELPING—RUN FASTER!"
Delaylord laughed.
"E V A D E T H E T A S K S O F Y O U R L I F E O R P E R I S H."
Raon: "THIS IS BULLSHIT!"
Shion: "AGREED!"
They dodged, rolled, dove, and tripped through a storm of deadly life obligations.
Raon punched a floating Pending Responsibility so hard it shattered into pixels.
Shion deflected an Overdue Assignment with her tablet.
Then the arena floor opened—revealing a swirling dark pit filled with scrolls.
Delaylord boomed:
"B E H O L D
M Y U L T I M A T E A B I L I T Y —
T H E B A C K L O G."
Raon gasped.
"…HOW MANY ITEMS ARE IN THERE?!"
Shion scanned it.
"Calculating…
…
Shit. Raon. It doesn't have a number. It just says 'Too Many.'"
Delaylord spread his arms.
The Backlog exploded upward.
Thousands of glowing tasks erupted like a geyser.
Raon's pupils shrank.
"SHION."
"Yes?"
"If we survive this—"
"Yes?"
"—I'm going to finally fold my laundry."
Shion froze.
"…Raon. No. Don't make promises you don't intend to keep."
Delaylord howled:
"LET THE INFINITE DELAY COMMENCE!"
Raon cracked her knuckles.
Shion activated full battle analysis mode.
The boss theme started playing from somewhere overhead.
Raon yelled:
"ALRIGHT DELAY DADDY — PREPARE TO GET KICKED INTO NEXT WEEK!"
Shion screamed:
"STOP CALLING HIM DELAY DADDY!"
The Backlog rained down.
And the battle began.
---
END OF CHAPTER 109