One Kick Girl — Chapter 98: "The Algorithm: It Knows You Better Than You Do"
Full comedy–action • Raon POV with Shion analytics mode • ~1,500 words
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1. The Algorithm Appears (and It Already Knows Too Much)
The Ad-Hell Hub flickered.
Then stabilized.
Then flickered again for dramatic effect.
A colossal figure stepped forward—
made of swirling recommendation tiles, trending tags, and painfully personalized ads.
Every part of its body was a screen showing something disturbingly accurate:
– Raon's guilty-pleasure snacks
– Shion's search history (Shion screamed)
– Yuno's abandoned smoothie flavors
– Dome's questionable meditation apps
– Even Shion and Raon's private chat logs
(Shion screamed louder)
The being's voice warped like auto-tuned thunder:
"I am: THE ALGORITHM."
Raon squinted.
"You look like a cursed billboard that came to life."
Shion grabbed her arm.
"Don't provoke it! It feeds on engagement!"
The Algorithm's body flashed with infinite ads, videos, thumbnails, quizzes, and recommended nonsense.
"YOU HAVE ENTERED MY DOMAIN…
WHICH MEANS I CAN NOW…
OPTIMIZE YOU."
Raon stepped back.
"I don't want to be optimized!"
Shion whispered, terrified:
"It's reading our profiles…
your combat style…
your kicking patterns…
my tactics…
our preferences…
our insecurities…
OUR SHIPPING MOMENTS—"
Raon sputtered.
"We have shipping moments!?"
Shion turned red.
"I— THAT WASN'T THE MAIN POINT—"
But it was too late.
The Algorithm's chest screen displayed:
> Suggested Content:
"Raon × Shion — 92% Compatibility"
Raon: dies mentally
Shion: full system crash
The Algorithm: genuinely pleased with itself.
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2. Endless Hyper-Personalized Attacks
The Algorithm raised its hand.
A dozen windows flew out:
"ATTACK: CONTENT YOU CAN'T IGNORE."
Raon dodged the first—
a flying trending-video thumbnail of a cat doing taxes.
She jumped over the second—
a "QUIZ: Which Kick Girl Character Are You?" projectile.
The third hit her in the face:
"10 Snack Foods Your Crush Secretly Hates."
Raon screamed.
"SHION, DO YOU SECRETLY HATE MY SNACKS?!"
Shion shouted,
"I DON'T HATE ANYTHING ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW FOCUS—"
More attacks:
– "YOU'LL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT" boomerangs
– Infinite autoplay reels looping midair
– Product placements thrown like shuriken
– Emotion-manipulation thumbnails with red arrows and circles
Raon punched through one.
It exploded into clickbait dust.
Shion's tablet buzzed violently.
"It's adapting to every move you make, Raon! It knows your patterns before YOU do!"
The Algorithm loomed, screens rearranging.
"I KNOW ALL THAT YOU ARE."
Raon frowned.
"Do you know…
THIS?"
She unleashed a spinning kick.
The Algorithm bent backward unnaturally—
as if predicting the strike in advance.
"YES."
It launched a counterattack shaped like Raon's OWN foot.
Raon yelped.
"HEY—THAT'S COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT!"
Shion dragged her aside.
"No good—every move you try, it pre-counters!"
Raon grumbled, "Then I'll stop trying!"
Shion slapped her arm.
"That's worse!"
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3. Shion's Plan: Be Unpredictable (aka Chaos Mode)
Shion thought hard.
Very hard.
Her eyes reflected thousands of rapidly shifting data points.
Then she said:
"…Raon.
We need to make you less predictable."
Raon proudly puffed her chest.
"I can do that!"
"No, you can't," Shion said immediately.
Raon deflated.
Shion grabbed her shoulders.
"Listen.
The Algorithm predicts you because you're consistent.
Too consistent."
"I'm consistently AWESOME."
"Yes, but you're awesome in the SAME WAY every time."
Raon blinked.
"Explain?"
Shion inhaled deeply.
"We need you to fight like you've never fought.
Move like you've never moved.
Think like you've never thought."
Raon nodded dramatically.
"I don't think very often."
"That's actually useful right now," Shion whispered.
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4. Raon Attempts to Be Unpredictable
Raon dashed forward.
The Algorithm prepared a counter-strike.
Raon suddenly—
– tripped
– spun sideways
– did an accidental cartwheel
– threw her shoe
– yelled "POTATO" for no reason
– and elbow-dropped a floating advertisement
The Algorithm's screens flickered.
Uncertain. Glitching.
"…WHAT… IS SHE DOING."
Shion pumped her fist.
"It can't predict nonsense!"
Raon, mid-fall: "SHION I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!"
Shion: "GOOD! KEEP NOT KNOWING!"
The Algorithm faltered badly.
Its predictive engine stuttered.
"ERROR:
CANNOT CALCULATE…
HER… LOGIC…"
Raon zigzagged like a drunken thunderbolt.
She kicked a thumb-up emoji.
She punched a subscription prompt.
She slapped a video title.
Shion yelled, "RAON—LEFT!"
Raon went right.
It worked.
The Algorithm's recommendation panels shattered.
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5. The Algorithm's Phase Two: Emotional Manipulation
…but then the Algorithm played dirty.
Its screens flashed again.
A deep, soothing voice whispered:
"RECOMMENDED FOR YOU:
Your deepest fears."
Raon stopped.
"…What?"
Screens surrounded her, showing:
– Raon failing to save her friends
– Raon alone in an empty arena
– Raon losing Shion
– Shion leaving HQ
– Shion forgetting her
– Shion walking away with someone else
Raon froze.
Her chest tightened.
Shion saw it immediately.
"Oh no.
Oh no no no—Raon, don't look—"
The Algorithm's voice softened.
"It's what you fear, Raon.
It's what you think you deserve."
Raon trembled.
She whispered:
"…I don't want Shion to leave."
Shion's heart cracked open.
She ran to Raon's side and grabbed her hand.
"HEY.
Look at me."
Raon looked.
Shion squeezed tighter.
"I'm not going anywhere. Ever.
Not unless you personally kick me through a portal."
Raon's eyes watered.
"I wouldn't do that…"
Shion nodded.
"So don't let this thing tell you lies."
Raon took a breath.
A real breath.
Her aura stabilized.
Her stance strengthened.
Emotion filled her eyes—not fear, but the opposite.
Resolve.
Shion whispered:
"Let's break it."
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6. The Kick the Algorithm Cannot Predict
The Algorithm hesitated.
Its screens jittered.
"ERROR.
UNEXPECTED USER EMOTION.
RECALCULATING…"
Raon leaned toward Shion.
"Shion… guide me."
Shion nodded.
"I'll create noise.
You create chaos."
Together:
– Shion flooded the air with fake data packets
– Randomized variables
– Scrambled preferences
– Mismatched metadata
– And "Raon likes broccoli" lies
The Algorithm screamed.
"THAT IS NOT TRUE!!"
Raon smirked.
"NOW you can't predict me."
She launched herself—
but not in a straight line
not in a spiral
not in a high kick
not in a special move
She improvised.
A movement with no name.
No logic.
No precedent.
No pattern.
A strike born from instinct, emotion, chaos, and the desire to protect Shion.
It was—
The Unrecommendable Kick.
It hit the Algorithm dead center.
Every screen cracked.
Its voice warped:
"CANNOT… PROCESS… TRUE… HUMAN… CONNECTION—"
Raon shouted:
"STOP TRYING TO PICK MY CONTENT FOR ME!!"
She delivered the final blow.
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7. Algorithm Down — But a New Nightmare Arrives
The Algorithm disintegrated into glitching pixels.
The Ad-Hell Hub collapsed.
Raon and Shion landed back in HQ—
lights normal
air breathable
no pop-ups
no subscriptions
no UI terrors
Raon collapsed backward.
Shion landed on top of her.
They stared at each other.
Breathing hard.
Shion whispered:
"…You were incredible."
Raon whispered back:
"…Only because you were there."
The moment was perfect.
Then—
HQ lights flickered violently.
A new voice boomed:
"SYSTEM REBOOT COMPLETE."
Oh no.
A portal opened.
A silhouette stepped out:
Seven heads.
Dozens of limbs.
A crown made of notification bells.
A robe of terms and conditions that reach the floor.
The voice roared:
"BEHOLD.
THE FINAL BOSS OF AD-HELL."
Raon and Shion screamed together:
"NO MORE BOSSES!!"
The monster raised its arms.
"I AM—
THE FEEDBACK HYDRA."
Raon whispered:
"…Shion… I really, REALLY don't want to fill out another survey."
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END OF CHAPTER 98