One Kick Girl — Chapter 91: "Spinwheel Emperor: 2% Installed"
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1. The Calm Before the Wheel
Every HQ member agreed on one thing:
Nobody talks about the Buffer King incident.
A rule was put in place:
> If Raon asks why the Wi-Fi is fast, say "Thank you Committee."
Sena from accounting was assigned as official "statue witness" to pretend she saw nothing.
Raon sat at a table with Shion, eating noodles.
"I don't get it," she said between slurps. "If I beat the dude, shouldn't he be gone?"
Shion, eyes dead with trauma: "Raon… digital entities don't die. They respawn like bad mobile ads."
Raon tilted her head. "So we just beat them again, right?"
Yuno, from the next table: "That's what you said about the disco ball."
Raon pointed her chopsticks like a duel spear. "It HAD IT COMING."
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2. The First Spin
Elevator screen flickered.
Battery icon spun. Not loading.
Just spinning.
Shion blinked.
"…That's not normal."
Yuno dropped her smoothie. "I've seen this before."
Synthra Byte sprinted in: "WE'RE AT 2% DOWNLOAD AND IT'S THINKING ABOUT ITS LIFE!"
Across HQ, error graphics began forming: Spinning wheels of every variety—
Mac rainbow swirl
Windows blue donut
Android "Please Wait…" circle
Ancient dial-up hourglass
They floated like halos of slow death.
Raon stared, horrified.
"…they come in multiple flavors."
A voice, cold and smug, echoed through the speakers:
> "IMPERFECT IMPULSE DETECTED."
The cafeteria lights dimmed.
The wheels converged, forming a humanoid mass of rotating UI purgatory.
A crown of infinite loading icons.
Two arms made of spinning cursors.
Eyes like hourglasses dripping sand.
THE SPINWHEEL EMPEROR.
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3. The Emperor Declares War
His voice was velvet and doom:
> "Impatience is your weakness. You skip tutorials. You punch 'agree' without reading terms. You walk away when progress bars hit 99%."
Raon stepped forward. "I don't walk away. I hit things."
The Emperor pointed. Time slowed—like the world was stuck in a bad YouTube connection.
Shion whispered: "Everyone stay still—he's feeding on impatience."
Manager Kimchi stood up. "I'm perfectly calm—"
A single progress bar appeared above him.
Updating: 0%
He screamed.
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4. Dome Attempts Zen (Again, Why)
Maestro Dome slid out of the shadows like a monk who forgot his medication.
He bowed gracefully to the Emperor.
"Oh great wheel… we embrace patience. We accept—"
The Emperor raised a hand.
Dome froze mid-bow.
A single floating wheel hovered above him.
"Processing…"
Shion gasped. "He's buffering a person."
Raon clenched her jaw. "I didn't even know that was POSSIBLE."
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5. The Rules of Waiting
The Emperor's wheels hummed like industrial turbines.
> "I do not fight. I wait. The longer you resist… the slower I become."
He extended a hand at Synthra Byte.
Her cyber-arm locked at:
Loading — 33%
Synthra screamed. "I'M STUCK IN A THIRD OF A TASK!"
Yuno tried to run. A wheel consumed her shoe.
Installing Foot: 12%
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6. Raon's Natural Weakness
The Emperor drifted toward Raon.
> "You cannot defeat me. You have never once waited for a microwave to finish."
Her eye twitched violently.
"YOU LEAVE MY MICROWAVE HISTORY OUT OF THIS."
> "In line at a grocery store…
you pace." "At traffic lights…
you honk at the sky." "When software says 'Don't close the program'—
you close the program."
Raon screamed: "I ONLY CLOSE IT WHEN IT TAKES MORE THAN THREE SECONDS!"
The Emperor trembled with delight.
> "Your rage makes me STRONGER."
Every loading symbol in HQ grew brighter.
Raon stumbled.
Shion grabbed her shoulders.
"Listen to me. Do not attack him. Your impatience fuels him."
Raon shook like an animal.
"I CAN'T WAIT."
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7. The Forbidden Technique
Shion closed her eyes.
"…There is one thing he cannot withstand."
Raon blinked. "A nuclear kick?"
"No. A thing stronger than any martial art."
She whispered into Raon's ear:
"We wait… on purpose."
Raon's soul left her body.
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8. The Stand of Stillness
Raon stood still. Arms down. Eyes closed.
The Emperor balked.
> "You… obey patience?"
Shion stood beside her, equally motionless.
Yuno and Synthra followed. Even Dome remained frozen—though technically unwilling.
The Emperor faltered.
Every wheel slowed.
34% → 30%
2% → 1%
1% → error
Raon breathed through her teeth like a boiling kettle.
Seconds passed.
Actual, genuine seconds.
The Emperor shook violently.
> "WHAT IS THIS… CALM—"
Raon opened one eye.
"…I'm done."
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9. Kick of the Zen Apocalypse
She didn't sprint. She didn't scream.
She simply walked forward.
Step.
Step.
Step.
She aligned her heel.
One perfect arc.
A kick delivered with all the power of someone who waited… just long enough.
CRACK—
The Spinwheel Emperor shattered like glass at 99%.
A shower of frozen icons fell like snow.
Loading bars snapped to completion.
Synthra's cyber-arm dinged: 100% — Done.
Yuno's shoe reappeared.
Dome unfroze, screaming mid-bow and falling onto his face.
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10. Aftermath
HQ rebooted.
A quiet miracle.
Shion wiped sweat from her brow.
"You… actually waited."
Raon exhaled slowly.
"It was… the worst experience of my life."
Yuno nodded solemnly. "We should never speak of this."
Dome raised a trembling hand. "…I saw eternity. It was the Bluetooth settings menu."
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11. Post-Credit Glitch
Far below HQ, deep inside the primary data vault…
a fragment of the Buffer King and a shard of the Spinwheel Emperor began to merge.
A new voice hissed:
> "PHASE III: CAPTCHA GOD."
> SELECT ALL IMAGES WITH 'KICK GIRL.'
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END OF CHAPTER 91