Eldran stood before the holocron his eyes closed, his breath sharp and uneven. The lessons of both his parents and the Jedi echoed in his mind: Serenity, peace, harmony, knowledge – these were the paths to the force. But his anger burned hotter than any mantra ever could. It throbbed in his chest, and the holocron in front of him vibrated in response. He kept his eyes shut, recalling the anger that had ignited against Tarron a year ago. The anger he felt at the boy being beaten. The holocron began to split again, the red giving way to yellow as the top began to open.
"Eldran, it's time, for evening meal" he heard his mother shout. In that instance his anger was gone and the holocron sat silently on his counter. Eldran forced his feelings down, shame over taking him as he swallowed it and forced himself to leave his room.
His mother Seris Veyor was an educator and healer at the spice clinic on the other side of Brentaal Iv's sprawling underground. His relationship with her had always calmed him, ever since he was a small child. "How were your studies at the temple this week" she asked as Eldran arrived at the table. Her green eyes met his as the compassion in her voice soothed his feelings of contempt for the guards.
"They were…" Eldran swallowed his emotions and looked at both of his parents who returned his gaze awaiting his reply "different" he said finally "This master Verrin has a different perspective than many of the Jedi that I've encountered"
Eldran's father raised his eyebrows in curiosity. He had never heard his son speak positively of the Jedi and it had seemed that ever since he had begun meeting with the new master Eldran had actually looked forward to going to the temple "I'm proud of you Eldran" Kaelan said "To see you understanding the way of the force, and how it surrounds us, is good for all of us" his father smiled his typical compassionate smile, but there was fear in his smile, a father's unease hidden behind faith.
"I still can't touch the force" Eldran began to say "I don't know what happened in the school yard that day but it's as if the force is out of reach for me since that day"
His father and mother both looked solemn. Neither wanted to attribute the force's silence to Eldran's using powerful emotion that day, and tapping into dark side energy for the force's silence.
"Have you asked either of the Jedi master's about it?" Kaelan asked
"I have asked both of them" Eldran said "Master Vannor told me that I wasn't balanced and that I needed to empty myself of all negative energy or I may be unable to touch it." He swallowed he wanted to tell his parents about the suggestion from Master Verrin but he was especially concerned with how his father would react.
"And what of Master Verrin?" Seris asked "You seem to appreciate his perspective on things. What did he suggest?"
Eldran looked between his parents again knowing full well that his parents would not be thrilled with the suggestion of using a powerful emotion to touch the force "He said that the force will stay silent for those who continue to lie to themselves" he said finally. He knew this was only part of what the Jedi had said, and technically a half truth but still a truth "He said that I should view the galaxy through the lense of my experience and not continue to tell myself the lies that I have been told" he looked up from his place mat as he ate some of the bread that had been put before him
"What does he mean by that?" Kaelan asked "What lies have you been told?"
Eldran could feel his anger building again in his chest "The lies of peace and justice in the galaxy as we sit here eating bread" he said after several minutes "I witnessed a boy my age being beaten by republic guards for stealing food to eat, and I witnessed a republic official taking a bribe from the guilds" His voice was shaky but firm. "Through all of this the Jedi stood as witness and did nothing, how is that peace!? Why don't they act? They say they are the defenders of peace and justice." His voice began to raise as he looked back and forth between his parents. As he spoke the holocron in the other room rattled on its thin shelf. Its red hue pulsing faster as his pulse quickened before his parents.
"Eldran" his mother said calmly, again her voice having the soothing effect on his emotions, her green eyes showing the worry and compassion of working at the clinic for so many years "The Jedi are not gods" she said calmly "They are sentient beings just like you and I are, they make mistakes just like you and I do" she reaches her hand across the table and places it on top of Eldrans "While they are powerful, you must understand that they walk a very shallow line between keeping their orders tenants and keeping the peace in the galaxy"
Kaelan remained silent for a long moment "Do you know which Jedi stood and watched as these things were happening?" he asked after a moment
Eldran shook his head "No I didn't recognize them, I only knew they were Jedi by their robes and the lightsabers at their hips"
Kaelan nodded "You are still very young Eldran, and unfortunately you have seen so much at your age already. But one thing I want you to hear me say, is that even without the power of the force we have the power to act on these things, it isn't the only thing that has the power to move the galaxy."
Eldran took another slice of bread from the table in front of him and began cutting it as listened to his father "What can I possibly do in this situation?" he asked
Kaelan walked around the table and placed a compassionate hand on Eldran's shoulder "Our choices move as much as the force does" he said "You have a voice, and you know where the Jedi stay" he continued "Just like you used your voice, not knowing that the force would aide you against Tarron, you can use your voice in the Jedi temple and in the courts to make sure these things don't continue to happen. The Jedi promote justice and democracy in the galaxy, and part of being in a democratic society is we must learn to use our voices to point out corruption." His father hesitated for a moment and then returned to his side of the table "You can speak truth, even when those who hold the power refuse to say anything"
Eldran nodded understanding his father's heart. He also knew that he was right "If it's ok I'm going to turn in" he said as he rose from the table and embraced both his parents before returning to his room.
As Eldran entered his room the holocron sat silent on the small shelf where he had left it, the red shimmer reflecting the light into the room, and he sighed and crawled into his bed. He didn't want to continue to try and focus on opening the holocron tonight. Even the positive strong feelings that he had didn't seem to have any effect on it and he had no interest in the negative feelings that he had been having. Instead he curled up in his bed and thought of his friends at the primary academy.
Tomorrow the academy was back in session and this year Tarron wouldn't be the nuisance that he had been in previous years. He had found out that Tarron had graduated out to the secondary academy, where he was no doubt terrorizing other children. Derren and Eldran both had a year left in primary, and they both had discussed how they were looking forward to the year. As Eldran drifted to sleep the faint red glow of the holocron painted the walls in his room. Verrin's voice echoed in his dreams: "The force stays silent for those who lie to themselves"
***
The next day was a typical first school day of any school year at the Primary academy. Eldran stood side by side with Derren as the teachers ran through the same monotony of rules and syllabus as they had every year. Eldran rolled his eyes at Derren as they sat in their middle hour class and the Durosian professor, Klyss Den, droned on about the history of the galaxy. Somehow this teacher didn't get the memo that it was the first day of school and began lecturing on the historical council of the year 3281, and never once stopped talking. Eldran thought he heard something about early Jedi who met the Sith emperor but his boredom quickly overpowered his interest in listening to the teacher.
During their last hour Derren and Eldran found themselves outside for a relax hour as they looked around the school yard.
"This is where it all happened last year" Derren said
"I know" Eldran said sounding annoyed as the events from last year were brought up again "You don't have to remind me"
"I just want you to know I owe you" Derren said "Not like a life-debt or anything like that but you've got my loyalty"
Eldran nodded in appreciation to his friend "Thanks Derren" he said
***
After school Edlran made his way to the clinic to work with his mother. As he looked around at the spice addicted residents of the clinic he wondered how his mother could work in this environment and still believe in the peace that the Jedi espoused. Somehow though, his mother and his father both understood compassion in a way that Eldran only hoped that he would someday be able to
"No stop leave me alone" Eldran heard someone shouting from behind him as he surveyed the clinic. He turned and saw two Rodians restraining a Togruta woman as a third held a syringe. None of them were connected with the clinic as far as he could tell. "I don't want it" she shouted at them as they held her down
"Its for your own good" one of the Rodians could be heard saying in galactic basic. At first the fear in Eldran burned similarly to how the anger had. He wanted to pretend like he hadn't seen or heard anything. The rest of the world seemed content in their blindness to the atrocity that was happening in front of him. The lessons from the dinner table suddenly came back with force as Eldran observed the scene. His father's words flooding his mind as others passed by and did nothing. His silence in that moment was complicity and he felt his fear and hesitation burn away.
"What are you doing!?" he shouted at the three Rodians.
Two of the Rodians jumped in fright at hearing Eldran's voice. His voice drew others to the scene as the two restraining the Togruta decided that it was now getting too much attention and released her and ran away. The third Rodian, however, the one that had spoken continued toward her with the syringe in hand "I've told you before you aren't going to stop" he said to her "If it's the last thing I do, you'll keep buying"
Eldran felt the spark of rage again as he realize that the Rodian with the syringe was a dealer "Leave her alone" he shouted "This clinic is off limits to you" he could feel the rage building in his chest but he didn't try to touch the force. "Guards" he called out to the clinic enforcers, and two heavily armed Twi'lek Republic contracted guild enforcers arrived and wrestled the Rodian to the ground, escorting him out of the clinic. No doubt he wouldn't stand trial and would be back out on the street within a day or so. But for now he wasn't going to be a problem
"Thank you" the Togruta said looking at Eldran "Most people would have ignored me but you helped" she walked over and clasped her hand around his wrist as a sign of thank you as she bowed her powerful head in respect.
The words of his father echoed in his ears and he repeated them in that instant "Sometimes, we have to use our voices to make sure that the wrongs of this world don't continue to happen" he smiled at the Togruta and then he turned and saw his mother standing there smiling at him as she walked over and embraced him, an embrace that once again doused the flame of anger that rose in his chest. For the first time since the force had touched his fingers, he dind't feel powerless and unable to act. It was still out of reach for him, but the galaxy around him had heard his cry. Outside of the clinic Eldran could feel the hum of the undercity – it felt alive in a way that it had never felt before, and for the first time, he thought it might be listening.