Taking a deep breath, Cassian tried to calm himself. He reached for the door handle. His heart still hammered from the confrontation. Had Leoric come to finish it? To drag him back and demand real answers?
His mother stood behind the door.
Her eyes softened when she saw him. "I wanted to check on you. Can I come in?" A small smile tugged at her lips.
Cassian stepped aside wordlessly. She entered, and he closed the door behind her.
The room wasn't large, but it was bigger than his cramped space in his past life. A bed with white sheets sat in the corner. It looked far more inviting than the thin mattress he'd slept on before. Light blue curtains blocked most of the moonlight, casting soft shadows across the walls. Everything was neat.
His mother made herself comfortable on the bed, patting the space beside her. Cassian sat stiffly, maintaining a careful distance.
"I heard you and your father arguing." Her voice sounded gentle but careful. "Is everything alright?"
How much did she hear? His stomach knotted. Did she suspect him too?
"We disagreed on a few things," Cassian said, forcing his voice to stay level. "But we're fine now." He managed a smile that didn't reach his eyes.
She nodded slowly, like she wanted to believe him but couldn't quite manage it. "He wants to keep you safe, you know. He's trying his best." Her hand rested on his knee. The touch was warm, maternal, everything his real mother had stopped being after his father left.
Cassian fought the urge to pull away. I don't want to upset her. Not when she's looking at me like that.
"I guess," he muttered, looking away.
Silence stretched between them. Not the suffocating kind, but it was awkward. Both hesitant to say their thoughts. She sighed softly, her gaze drifting to the curtained window.
A question clawed its way up Cassian's throat. One he hadn't dared ask before but needed answers to.
"Do you think I'm a monster?"
The words came out quieter than he'd intended. He sounded vulnerable. Pathetic.
Horror flashed across her face. She turned to him sharply, and Cassian immediately backtracked. "Never mind. It was a stupid question…"
"You are not a monster, Cassian." Her voice was firm. "Don't ever believe that."
He blinked, caught off guard by the conviction in her tone.
"People fear what they don't understand," she continued, her hand tightening slightly on his knee. "Very little is known about Arcane weavers. And the few who lived..." She paused, choosing her words carefully. "They weren't good people."
How comforting.
"But I believe you're different." Her eyes met his, warm and unwavering. "You're my good boy. And I know you'll prove them all wrong."
Something twisted in Cassian's chest. A feeling he couldn't name, sharp and uncomfortable. It felt equally nice and wrong.
"Your father and I love you deeply," she said softly. "We'll stay by your side. No matter what happens. No matter what anyone says. You're our son, and nothing will change that."
Cassian's throat closed. He managed a jerky nod, unable to trust his voice.
She smiled, a hint of mischief breaking through the heavy moment. "You didn't say it back."
"Say what?" His voice came out hoarse.
"That you love me too."
The words stuck in his throat, refusing to be let out. I'm not your son. Your real son is dead. I'm just wearing his face, and you don't even know it.
"I..." He forced the words out. "Love you too." It felt wrong. Like stealing something precious that didn't belong to him.
But her smile lit up the room. It was filled with warmth that made his chest ache. "That's better." She stood, smoothing her skirts. "Now sleep well. You need your rest."
She walked toward the door, and Cassian found himself speaking before he could stop himself.
"And... thank you."
She paused, glancing back over her shoulder. "Anything for you, darling."
The door closed with a soft click.
Cassian let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding. He raked his hands through his hair. The white tamed strands felt foreign between his fingers. At least she's on my side.
The thought brought no comfort. She was on the side of a son who no longer existed. Leoric knew something was wrong. How long until she figures it out too? How long before that warm smile turned to a look of betrayal?
He fell back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. Exhaustion seeped into his limbs, but his mind wouldn't settle.
Could this be my new life? A life actually worth living?
He had a mother who loved him. Siblings who cared, even when he pushed them away. He didn't have to steal to eat. Didn't have to watch his real mother drown herself in bottles.
For the first time since being in this body, Cassian let himself relax. His muscles sank into the soft mattress. His eyelids grew heavy.
As sleep crept over him, Celeste's warning echoed faintly. Ten years. Ten years to complete her ridiculous task.
He pushed the thought away. It didn't matter.
I'm going to live. No matter what it takes.
***
His lungs burned. Cassian stopped running. His hands landed firmly on his knees as he gasped for air. Each breath stung like swallowing glass shards. Sweat soaked through his shirt, clinging to his soft skin that felt too unused to hard work.
This body is pathetically weak.
He'd barely run for five minutes before his legs gave out. Five minutes. In his old life, he'd outrun guards through half the city without breaking stride.
The morning air was crisp and clean, nothing like the smoke-choked streets he'd known. He straightened with effort, grimacing at the tremor in his thighs.
Breakfast had been worse than dinner. Leoric's gaze never left him the entire meal. Even Caspian was quiet, sensing the tension. After Leoric left, muttering something about the priests, Cassian escaped outside.
If he was stuck in this body, he'd make it stronger. He had to.
His legs buckled. Cassian collapsed onto the grass, chest heaving. The early morning sun peeked from behind clouds, painting everything in soft golden haze.
A shadow fell over him.
Caspian stared down with wide, confused eyes. "Mom is calling you."
Cassian groaned but forced himself upright. His legs screamed in protest. He followed the boy inside with wobbly steps.
"You're sweaty," Caspian leaned away dramatically.
"Great observation," Cassian muttered.
Inside, their mother was dressed for going out. So was Lucian. His older brother's eyes scanned Cassian like he'd grown a second head. "Did you... run?" His tone was incredulous.
The original Cassian clearly didn't exercise. That explained the twig-like build.
"Not for long," Cassian said, trying to sound casual. "Figured I should train now that I've awakened."
Something flickered across Lucian's face before he turned away with a huff. "Fine. Go wash up. You stink."
"You don't smell too pleasant yourself."
"Boys." Their mother's voice cut through the bickering, amused. She turned to Cassian. "Your brother and I are heading out. I need you to watch Caspian."
Cassian's stomach dropped. He exchanged glances with the six-year-old. Caspian looked utterly unbothered.
"Don't wreck the house," Lucian started, ticking off rules on his fingers. "Don't open the door to strangers. Don't let him..."
"I'm sure Cassian has it under control," their mother interrupted, smiling warmly.
Bold of you to assume that.
He watched them leave. The door closed with an air of finality.
Cassian turned slowly to face Caspian.
Great. I have to babysit.