Hinata Softbun suddenly stepped forward with delicate lotus pace, her twin mountains bouncing like they were about to rebel against heaven's gravity.
As both reached the center of the seating formation, where one row was left empty for teacher to strut like peacock, Softbun beauty suddenly turned her jade neck, eyes flashing like innocent rabbit but secretly cunning fox. She gave Kai one mysterious nod, as if saying, "Come, follow this lady's dao path."
Kai froze for half breath, then slowly shifted his dog-like gaze toward protagonist Naruto Nosmoking. That brat's face was serious like he was cultivating forbidden constipation technique.
Kai also nodded, pretending like two experts exchanging secret move before martial duel. Then he quickly followed Hinata like shameless dog following butcher carrying meat bun.
'Phewwww… that was close escape. Not to mention, I am having premonition that Sakura-chan will absolutely love to see useless Hinata being chased by ugly-face Kai.'
Sure enough, Nosmoking secretly turned his head, eyes narrowing like squinting pervert monk.
Behind him, Sakura Flatfield was indeed smiling crazy smile, her lips curving like evil spirit who finally saw neighbor's wife take bath.
"Look, look, Hinata-chan is stepping out to resolve calamity!"
"She is doing so because of her boundless love for Naruto-kun. This is not simple action, this is Dao of Pure Love."
"Of course! Otherwise, why would heavenly beauty even waste half glance on that trash loser? Surely only to protect Naruto-kun's reputation."
"Such righteous devotion! Truly touching!"
"Indeed, Hinata-chan is gem among jade, lotus among weeds. Naruto-kun is blessed by heavens!"
The whispers already spread like wildfire in autumn grass, and Hinata Softbun, although outwardly keeping straight face like she was walking serious cultivation path, inwardly was bursting with smug joy.
'Yes, yes, continue! Praise me more! Tell heaven and earth of Hinata-chan's great sacrifice for her Naruto-kun!'
She lifted her little nose, cheeks slightly red, walking with proud gait like peacock who discovered spiritual herb.
Meanwhile, Kai nearly exploded with laughter but forced it down into his dantian. His lips trembled, his shoulders shaking.
'This is easier than eating free buns at temple fair… man, look at those cheeks. Swish-swish, clap-clap, shaking like two sacred drums of lust!'
Kai's dog-like eyes naturally fell toward the forbidden region. The blue skirt barely reached above meaty jade thighs, and every step caused it to sway like drunken immortal's fan, lifting just enough to tease upper thigh but never revealing the holy heaven cheeks themselves.
Kai swallowed mouthful of saliva.
'Truly, this is torment worse than nine hells. Dao of Gooning is being tested severely today.'
'Now, in what method shall I proceed?'
Kai's heart was full of waves. His brain was rotating like eight donkeys pulling a cart. The chance to apply the backside-touching skill was like a dragon hidden in the abyss—mysterious and elusive.
But fate, which the great sages once said, "when the donkey falls asleep, the cart still rolls downhill," gave him chance without action.
For immediately outside the class, world-shaking turmoil was happening. A great battle of life and death between two dogs of Class B.
Kai belonged to Class A. But classes here were as meaningless as clouds in sky. The heaven-sent administrators put numbers into jar and pulled them like fortune sticks. That was how Kai, the lowest turtle in pond, rank 999, found himself in Class A, while a dragon-like genius rank 2 was dumped into Class B like yesterday's cabbage leaf.
The fighters were two young men. One had hair like orange peel, the other wore spectacles like destiny's shackles.
The spectacles boy spat poisonous words like a scholar with diarrhea or in other words, oure rage baiting, and the orange one lost his calm, roaring like a bull seeing red underpants.
Around them, a circle of melon-eating disciples gathered to view the play.
Kai sighed like an ancient monk tired of humanity. "Ayya… morning also not spared, must fight already?"
But Hinata Softbun, like a proud lotus ignoring frog, did not regard him with one grain of rice. Her eyes were straight like arrow, glued on the disturbance.
With cold face and fiery inner heart, she stepped forward, her skirt swishing like the tails of twin fox spirits.
With that, Kai suddenly stretched forth his demonic finger and poked the arm of one eager melon-eating disciple.
"Ayya, who this person be?!" the boy cried in grand manner.
The boy flicked his sleeve with disdain, as though to brush away mosquito. But alas, fate was tricky like old dog!
His casual swat landed not on Kai's worthless arm, but instead slapped directly into the soft side of Hinata Softbun, who was not paying one dog fart of attention.
"Ah!"
With a cry like a sparrow, she tripped, body tilting like a falling willow. She collapsed forward, face kissing the floor, divine buns raised high towards the nine heavens.
In that instant, Kai's monkey heart and horse spirit both erupted. He wanted to jump, clap, dance, do handstand—anything! Because before him was the sight of white snow—panty of simplest design, worn only by pure maidens untouched by worldly dust.
But beneath, oh beneath! Those two celestial mountains of soft snow, tightly hugged by the cloth, as if screaming to be liberated. Kai's nose almost spouted blood like a dragon fountain.
"Ohhh, my Hinata-chan! Are you alright?!"
Like lightning he was there, grabbing her jade hand in one palm, while the other hand—without hesitation, without morality—descended in a casual pat upon the snowy peaks of destiny.
Whoosh!
As if heaven approved, as if Dao itself lent a hand, the white panty disappeared without resistance! One moment it existed, next moment—vanished into void realm, no one knows where.
Truly, the Dao of Extraction was mighty!
Kai's eyes, sharper than thunder eagle in storm, darted back in lightning speed.
His gaze landed directly upon forbidden garden, her tender pink flower, and above it, the delicate star of chrysanthemum, blushing like dawn clouds.
His mouth instantly watered like starving beast at spring banquet.
But! Kai Longdong was no fool. Before the other disciples' dog eyes could witness this heaven-shaking scene, he immediately hoisted her jade body up like gallant hero.
"Ah!"
Yet instead of gratitude, the ungrateful jade slapped his immortal hands away, anger flashing like sword light in her eyes—before shame replaced it like autumn frost.
"T-thank you… Kai Longdong…" she muttered, as if swallowing ten thousand bitter pills.
Her soft hand wiped furiously at the place he had touched, as though cleansing filth from holy jade skin, and she hurried forward, hips swaying like twin bells of temptation.
Kai Longdong, however, was not angered. No, his lips curved upwards into lecherous smile.
Because in his sea of consciousness—ding!
A sacred bell chimed, resonating through his Dao heart.
[Ding! Quest complete!]
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[A/N – Dear Readers, if you have not yet grasped, this humble story is written in the style of badly-translated cultivation novel. The words may stumble like newborn dragon, but still addictive like immortal nectar. Enjoy, laugh, and do not take too seriously. If you guys have suggestion, please bestow upon me, humble author shall gratefully receive.]