WebNovels

Chapter 4 - The Weight of Realizations

As the semester unfolded, Abhiram began to notice things more clearly—details that once slipped past him in the haze of new beginnings. His classmates often spoke freely about fees, scholarships, and the strange balance of privilege that existed within the education system. At first, Abhiram ignored such conversations, choosing to drown himself in notes and lessons. But slowly, the truth crept in.

It wasn't just about marks. It wasn't just about effort.

He discovered that his high fees were tied to his community background, not merely his academic performance. Some of his classmates, who had even scored less than him, paid far less. Others had their entire education sponsored by trust funds or charitable organizations, their financial worries lifted.

The realization stung—not because he envied them, but because he knew the cost his family had borne. His parents had sold land to secure his seat, believing education would be the bridge to a better future. The sacrifice felt heavier now, knowing others had walked in more easily while he carried the burden of debt.

Yet, Abhiram refused to let bitterness consume him. Instead, he sharpened his focus. His notes expanded beyond PCM into Python programming, English, and Tamil literature. Page after page filled with his determined handwriting, as though each line was an act of resistance against the unfairness he had uncovered.

College life itself carried its own rhythm. In the mornings, Abhiram boarded the college bus, watching the city roll past—temples at dawn, vendors setting up their stalls, children rushing to school with heavy bags. But returning home was rarely smooth. Many times, the college bus service stopped halfway, leaving him stranded. He would quietly board an MTC bus, jostling with strangers, holding onto the rails while balancing his backpack. The rides were tiring, yet they gave him time to think—to sort his thoughts between the hum of the engine and the crowd's chatter.

Inside the classroom, Abhiram became a man of routine. He kept to himself, rarely speaking unless asked. His notebooks were his companions, his goals his silent comfort. For him, loneliness was not pain—it had slowly become habit. He had lived two years without real friendships, without genuine conversations, and in that silence he had built a shield.

One afternoon, however, the past walked right back into his life.

Indrakumar, his old schoolmate, slid into the seat next to him. He smiled, tried to strike up a conversation, perhaps out of habit or maybe out of a genuine wish to reconnect. To others, it might have looked like nothing more than a casual reunion of classmates. But to Abhiram, it was complicated.

Two years of silence stood between them. Two years where he had built a routine of being alone. Two years where he had trained himself not to expect companionship.

So when Indrakumar laughed and tried to chat, Abhiram's response was simple—he avoided him. Not out of hatred, not out of pride, but out of confusion. He didn't know whether to welcome him back as a friend or to keep the walls up. The loneliness, though heavy, had also become comfortable. Breaking it now felt risky—like opening an old wound that had only just begun to heal.

And so, he stayed quiet, letting the moment pass.

In his heart, he wondered: "Am I pushing people away? Or am I just protecting myself?"

The days continued, the notebooks filled, the bus rides lengthened. And while the world around him buzzed with chatter, Abhiram walked his path silently, waiting to see where destiny would take him next.

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