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Chapter 19 - the terrible night

kate POV:

The house is dark. Too dark. My eyes snap open and my heart slams against my ribs. I sit up so fast the sheets fall around me and I can barely catch my breath. Shadows fill the corners of the room, stretching and twisting. My hands tremble, my chest tightens, and every part of me wants to run, to hide, to disappear.

Then the memories hit me like a wave. I see him, my father, his face twisted with anger. I feel the darkness of those rooms, the screaming, the fear. I see my mother falling and I remember the helplessness in my own hands. My throat closes and panic claws at my chest.

No, no, no. Please. Someone help me. My voice is a whisper at first, then it cracks into a loud, raw scream. I curl into myself on the sofa, clutching my knees as tears stream down my cheeks.

Everything is alive again. The fear, the helplessness. The darkness that used to swallow me whole.

Kate, calm down, please.

I hear footsteps on the floor. Kevin. My heart jumps, part relief, part terror. I scream again, louder, until my voice hurts. "It's too dark! It's too much! Please! Someone! Help me!"

He kneels beside me without rushing or panicking. "I'm right here. I'm not leaving you."

"I can't! I can't do this!" My words break into sobs. "It's too much, Kevin! It's him! He's everywhere!"

His hands are warm on my shaking arms. "Shh. I know it's terrifying, but you're safe. You're not there anymore. You're here. I'm here."

I shake my head violently. The memories claw at my mind. My body rocks back and forth as I scream again, raw and desperate. "I don't want to remember! I don't want it!"

"You don't have to face it alone," he says softly, firmly. "I'm here. You don't need to fight it by yourself."

I clutch his arm and hide my face in his chest, trembling. "Please make it stop and make it go away"

His hand rubs gentle circles on my back. "It's already stopping, slowly. You're safe. You're alive. You're not there anymore."

The sobs start to lessen, little by little, turning into trembling hiccups. I curl against him, letting him anchor me. My body is spent from screaming, from the memories, from fear.

After a while, he helps me to the sofa and wraps a blanket around me. I curl up in it, still shaking, still hiccupping, but calmer. He sits beside me, close enough that his arm brushes mine. The warmth of him, steady and unshakable, soothes a part of me I thought would never feel safe.

"You can sleep now," he whispers. "I'm right here. I won't leave."

I sniffle, clinging to him. My body finally starts to relax. My eyelids grow heavy. My sobs have dried into soft hiccups. I bury my face into the blanket, breathing him in the calm, the safety. I don't say thank you. I can't. But he doesn't ask for it.

Slowly, slowly, I let go. My muscles relax. My chest rises and falls more evenly. Kevin's arm slides around me naturally, pulling me into a gentle, protective hug. I feel the tension melt, the terror fading into exhaustion.

I murmur something incomprehensible. He hums softly, steady and quiet. The sound blends with the house, the stillness, the dark.

I close my eyes. The memories are still there, lurking at the edges, but for now, they are distant. I am safe. He is here.

Eventually, my breathing evens out. Kevin's arm tightens slightly to keep me close, and then I feel him relax too. His own eyes close as the room stays quiet. The terrible night passes for now, and for the first time in a long time, I can finally sleep.

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