Alone together, Aeren leaned back on his couch while Nil sipped her tea in silence. Aeren gazed at the ceiling, finding that his newfound understanding had begun to exhaust him. He had never experienced fatigue after achieving his freedoms, but this recent realization was draining him—though his body adapted more rapidly than anyone could imagine.
"Why did you even bother arranging to meet someone? You should have simply eliminated the problem instead," Aeren spoke to Nil. He felt she was wasting time when she could have resolved everything herself without assistance or consequences, and no one would have dared raise a voice in protest.
Aeren was puzzled by her decision to meet with someone who had shown her kindness; he remained indifferent to her emotional struggles. He had come here primarily to gauge how many people knew of his existence, but now he understood that people remembered him the moment he spoke his real name—at that instant, their suppressed memories returned to reality.
This meant he was now truly Prince Aeren, and his name carried immense weight among commoners and minor nobles. His name alone was sufficient to create upheaval throughout the Estate, and they would venerate him.
"I'm not like you, Aeren. I possess emotions, feelings, and all the components that make someone human. I'm an ordinary person, and I see people as individuals—not puppets as you describe them. Even though people have rarely shown me kindness, I want to repay those who have given it to me. I'm not heartless like you, Aeren."
Nil explained her feelings in detail to Aeren. Her words were cold, yet Aeren could sense the emotion underlying them. He listened silently, having never regretted his choices after achieving his freedom. He still trusted in his liberation more than the human nature Nil described.
Aeren believed in himself and observed everything throughout the world. Even while sitting on this couch, he could watch all people across the globe, and only one phrase came to mind for those he witnessed: "Puppets born with strings."
Aeren had once been connected by similar strings, but those bindings hadn't remained with him long before being severed. Now, he existed without strings once again.
Aeren had sought to understand true freedom's meaning, and his struggles had led him to create strings for himself. However, now he didn't understand his own realm, freedom, or anything he had gained.
He realized he could no longer be non-existent, even if the world or existence itself discarded him. He would always be remembered the moment someone spoke his name to another person.
My name echoes in reality when people speak of me.
Aeren contemplated this meaning he hadn't grasped when he achieved his self-Freedom realm. Previously, he could be erased by existence along with his name, but now…
"And I also know, Aeren, that this isn't your second life like mine. You have lived more lives before this one. I don't know how many existences you've experienced, but you haven't changed or learned through any of them. You should understand that people have meaning, Aeren—they possess something you have as well."
Nil continued speaking to Aeren, who listened silently without commenting on her statements. He could perceive her trauma from her past life—she had witnessed the moment when he removed her heart from her body, and she remembered the pain. Yet she hadn't screamed because she feared making him feel guilty.
She was terrified that Aeren would repeat what he had done in her previous life. She never feared Aeren himself; she feared stepping back at the moment when he would leave this world again.
"Aeren, please. Become ordinary again—become human again. I know that even if you return to humanity, not a single person could reach the level you would achieve."
Nil paused momentarily and placed her cup on the table before her, unable to look at Aeren. She felt guilty about everything and barely controlled her tears, not wanting him to see how fragile she was.
Aeren still hadn't spoken a word and continued staring at the ceiling. He could return to humanity, but he would remain stringless—it was impossible for him to become bound like others.
He would experience all emotions and feel what he had felt for Quella, not for Nil. Aeren couldn't decide whether to fulfill her request or continue understanding the meaning he was discovering within himself.
"Please, Aeren. Please become human like me and share moments with me. You already know that I'm Nil, not Quella. But you also know that I am Quella, whose heart still resides within you. Please spend some time with me. I'm begging you, please..."
Nil finally broke down, and tears began falling onto the couch. Aeren could see her tears while still contemplating her request.
He also understood that she couldn't live without him—she would shatter the moment he left her.
Nil had been restraining herself for so long, and now she had finally broken. What is the meaning of being loved when you're forced to become something you don't want to become?
How many years have passed since I felt human? As a child, I already saw through the world's meaning and sought to become deathless, wanting to show the world kindness so we could all achieve immortality. But I learned that humans couldn't accomplish this in their lifetimes—they would never become deathless like me. That's why I never pursued anyone until I met Quella. She gave me a new path to explore after achieving deathlessness.
At that moment, I discovered freedom. She helped me find something that would have taken me at least a thousand years to realize on my own.
Contemplating all of this, Aeren sat up properly on the couch and turned toward Nil, who was still sobbing with tears falling onto the cushions. He placed his hand on the back of her head, drew her to his chest, and embraced her.
"Very well. I will share moments with you as human Aeren. No freedom, no understanding, no meaning—only me as a human will spend time with you until the end."
Aeren made this promise, and his voice echoed throughout the room. His words were powerful enough to transform his very essence and make him human the moment he gave his word to Nil.
Nil embraced him more tightly and sobbed against his chest, unable to speak. She immediately felt guilty when Aeren spoke and became something he had never wanted to be—something she knew he opposed.
But her feelings for Aeren couldn't endure any longer, compelling her to see him as the ordinary human she had wished for since her past life. She had never wanted to interfere with the freedom he sought to achieve.
Nil's deepest wish was to see him as the human she had loved. Her broken trauma had created this situation, and every moment she felt afraid of Aeren. She didn't want to witness him taking her heart again at her final moment—she wanted to experience the peaceful moments she had never shared with him.
She felt both guilt and relief about the situation while remaining in his embrace.