He had that smile...
A big, dumb, borderline psycho smile.
With a vodka bottle in his hand, no less.
Classy, huh?
I swear, I'm gonna strangle him before the night ends.
I thought he was finally done harassing me…
But nope! He's back at it again.
Complete idiot. Especially since, let's be honest—
I'm kind of a nightmare myself.
And as you've probably guessed, it's the same clown from earlier…
Noah Whatshisname.
---
Me – You jerk! Look at what you've done to me! I'm soaked, sticky, and I smell like a drunk raccoon!
Noah – Aww, does madam need a shower? Allow me to assist…
Before my brain could catch up, he had already picked me up like a potato sack.
Destination: the sea.
---
Me – PUT ME DOWN!!! NOAH WHATEVER-YOUR-NAME-IS, DROP ME RIGHT NOW! YOU'RE INSANE!
Pretty sure I cursed him with every creative insult my brain could produce.
He stopped. Feet in the water.
Me? Still hanging over his shoulder like a sack of regret.
Noah – Apologize.
Me – For what?!
Noah – For being rude.
Me – Get lost.
And then—bam.
Head dunked straight into the water.
Fabulous.
Cold, salty, disgusting.
And this lunatic was holding me down by the arms.
I tried to push up, but nope. Too strong. Freaking psycho.
When I finally resurfaced, I was coughing and spitting water like a half-drowned cat.
Me – ARE YOU CRAZY?! I COULD'VE DIED!
Noah – Apologize.
Okay. Vocabulary shift. Slightly more polite.
Me – Go jump off a cliff.
(Yes, I swear. It's bad. Don't be like me.)
And guess what?
Back under I go.
He's a sadist. Full-on, giggling psychopath.
I stayed calm. Held my breath.
And then... genius moment.
I played dead.
He yanked me out like a panicked lifeguard in a soap opera.
Noah – HEY! HEYYY! Wake up! No no no—don't do this to me! OH CRAP I KILLED HER! Please wake up! She was actually cute… I could've—argh, I'm such a moron!
I was dying inside.
Trying so hard not to laugh.
He leaned closer to check if I was breathing.
So I smacked his ear hard and burst out laughing.
Noah – ARE YOU INSANE?! You maniac!
I stopped, dead serious.
Me – Excuse me? Who's the maniac here? I don't play games, dude.
Noah – You scared the hell outta me.
Me – Good. Maybe next time you'll think twice before drowning me. You're already on my blacklist, and now this? Too much.
Noah – You're loud, annoying, crazy—shall I go on?
And then…
He shoved sand in my hair.
My clothes.
Everywhere.
And like the prince of chaos that he is, he threw me back into the sea…
And just walked away.
Me (screaming at the waves) – YOU JERK!!! TOTAL IDIOT!!!
Noah (from far away) – Yeah, yeah, you already said that. Peace!
Grrrrrr.
I was ready to bite someone.
---
I got out of the water, shivering.
Cold, wet, miserable.
Checked for my phone…
Gone.
Amazing.
Exactly what I needed.
Fine. I walked. Alone. Like a damp gremlin.
In the middle of a giant crowd, and with my glorious height of 4'10" (ahem), there was no way I'd find my friends.
So I took a shortcut.
Dark. Creepy. Usually empty.
But tonight?
I heard laughter.
A guy's voice.
Familiar.
Lucas.
Finally. A decent soul.
I ran toward the sound.
Then… I heard a girl's voice.
I picked up the pace.
And then—
Lucas. In boxers.
Her, in underwear.
Stuck together.
Tongues. Hands. EVERYWHERE.
I felt like throwing up.
Then I got furious.
Then something else hit me—a weird knot in my stomach.
My face must've looked like death itself.
Me – Lucas?!
He froze.
Looked me right in the eyes.
And he knew.
He grabbed his clothes in a rush and ran over.
Lucas – Yuri! It's not what it looks like!
But I was already walking away.
He caught up and turned me around.
Me – DON'T TOUCH ME WITH THE HANDS THAT WERE ALL OVER HER BODY!
Lucas – Please, Yuri, just listen!
Me – Listen to what? That you're sorry? That you drank too much? That it's all a misunderstanding? Save your breath. I don't care. It's your life.
Silence.
He lit a cigarette. Then another.
Then a third.
I lost it.
Snatched the cigarette from his mouth and stomped it out.
Me – Enough! I'm sick of your smoking BS!
Lucas – Are you serious?! Those things are expensive! You're pissing me off, Yuridia!
Oh boy.
He used my full name.
That's never a good sign.
Me – You know w
hat? You're all pissing me off tonight. I'm out of here!
I walked away. Alone.
Into the creepy alley.
And then…
Two arms.
A hand over my mouth.
I couldn't scream.