i woke up in the clinic.
the fluorescent lights hummed above me like a distant memory i didn't ask for.
somewhere nearby, i heard voices—doctors talking, footsteps moving, shadows shifting.
but none of it mattered.
none of it registered.
because the only thought screaming in my head was:
where is she?
where is my girlfriend?
i sat up suddenly, ignoring the sharp pain that raced through my body like electricity.
my head throbbed. my vision blurred. but i didn't care.
i didn't care if standing made the pain worse.
i didn't care if i collapsed again.
i just wanted to know if she was still here.
if she still cared.
if she stayed.
my eyes drifted to the window.
outside... i saw her.
my girlfriend.
standing beside someone.
a guy.
at first, i tried to calm myself.
i told myself maybe that was her brother. or her cousin. or someone she trusted.
but then—
my stomach twisted.
my heart dropped.
it was him.
the one who punched me.
the one who humiliated me.
the one who made me bleed in front of everyone.
and there she was. standing next to him.
smiling. talking.
as if nothing happened.
as if i didn't matter.
as if i was just a small piece of yesterday's trash, already forgotten.
i couldn't breathe.
my chest felt like it was being crushed from the inside out.
it didn't make sense.
why would she leave me for him?
was i that embarrassing to be with?
was i too lame to deserve her?
is it really so wrong to be someone like me in this generation?
are we—people like me—just walking jokes now?
is kindness now weakness?
is loyalty now boring?
am i... just the nerd she pitied?
my vision blurred, not from the wounds... but from the tears.
they started to fall slowly, then all at once.
i remembered her voice.
it echoed in my mind like a cruel joke from the past.
> "dai, it's always you. you know that. i'd never leave.
no matter what happens.
i promise."
a promise.
a lie.
because now she's standing beside the very person who broke me.
and that promise she swore?
it shattered like the rest of me.
i wasn't just crying anymore.
something else was rising.
something deeper. darker.
something twisted.
anger.
betrayal.
confusion.
why didn't she keep her word?
why did she look so comfortable with him?
and now... what do i even do?
when i see her again, what am i supposed to say?
do i pretend i saw nothing?
smile and act like everything's okay?
but if i do that...
won't i just break more?
or do i tell her the truth?
do i end it?
do i say we should break up?
but what if she agrees... like it means nothing to her?
what if she says yes... without even blinking?
what if she already replaced me?
i don't want this.
i don't want this.
i didn't ask for any of this.
and yet, here i am.
alone in this clinic.
bleeding from my face, and from my heart.