He was back. Again. The truth finally settled in.
"No," Axel whispered, his voice cracking like dry ice under pressure. "No, no, no…"
He jolted up so fast it felt like something tore in his leg. His breath hitched. Fast. Shallow. On the verge of spiraling, but he fought it. Gritted teeth. Clenched fists. Everything he had left went into forcing himself to stay grounded.
Not again. I can't do this again.
The panic clawed at his chest like a starving beast, dragging up all the noise he'd been keeping buried. His pulse roared. His skin felt too tight.
"[Aura of a God]," he muttered, barely audible.
A hum. Then silence.
The world dulled instantly. His eyes, once frantic, now hollowed out. Brain smoothed over like still water. The artificial indifference settled like a weighted blanket. Comforting yet suffocating.
He stood in front of the mirror. Stared deep into his own eyes. So unfamiliar, yet it was him.
Minimize contact, he told himself. Axel, get your shit together. Close connections… only lead to hurt.
And just like that, any trace of vulnerability vanished. His heart armored once more. He turned off his skill, his mouth curving into a passable smile.
Then, he walked out.
…
"Hey" He naturally slid into the seat next to Yanin.
"Yo." She squinted at him. "You… get into trouble pretty often."
"Hm?" He tilted his head innocently. "What do you mean?"
Yanin wordlessly shoved her phone in his face.
Ah. That.
The video showed Joseph and Elise attempting to hurt him. It showed Axel easily fighting back and dragging him away to a classroom. Then, there was a cut that showed Joseph running out the room, his face covered in bruises and bloody.
Don't these students have anything better to do? Instead of helping, they filmed instead. Shitty fuckers.
He clicked his tongue with annoyance.
"So," he asked, tone casual, "do you think I'll get in trouble for this?"
Yanin shrugged. "Technically self-defense. Depends if he wants to pursue charges."
"I doubt it. His pride is damaged enough. Dic–People like him would be too embarrassed to seek further." Axel added.
"..." Yanin stared at Axel weirdly.
"What?"
"Why did you correct yourself? Just call him a dick." Yanin muttered.
The main character shouldn't curse.
"I'm cleaning up my vocabulary." He explained.
"...Sure" Yanin did not believe him.
As Yanin kept observing, she noticed something VERY odd.
Axel was actually paying attention in class for once! His eyes focused onto Professor Livrein.
Moreover, he was taking notes that weren't mindless scribbles!
Never before seen.
What was even weirder was that look in his eyes. It carried nothing but respect and admiration.
What was up with him today?
Axel, sensing the heat of her gaze, turned slowly.
"Pay attention," he whispered, deadpan. Then he resumed taking notes like a model student.
Yanin was dumbfounded.
Axel, of all people, was telling her to pay attention!
The AUDACITY of this man.
With a dramatic huff, she looked back at the board.
But her eyes kept darting back. Something wasn't right with him. Axel was smiling. Smiling. For no reason.
Axel was never the smiley-type. He was full of cocky smirks with his know-it-all attitude, but she rarely saw him giving genuine smiles. And his smiles were for one person.
Professor Livrein.
…
While Yanin was having a personal crisis three inches to his left, Axel was perfectly normal.
In his head, he was thinking of Aeris.
The person who'd stepped in with no hesitation. Who offered him kindness when he expected cruelty. Who reminded him, just a little, that not everyone in the world was out to hurt him.
He respected her. A lot.
And that warm feeling in his chest? It made his expression soften without him even realizing.
So yeah. The smile was real. But, the reason behind it wasn't deep.
As class ended, Axel went out as usual, followed by Yanin.
"Axel" She called out. "You were acting really weird."
Axel turned his head to look at her.
"Weird? Me? You're overthinking it." He answered.
"Do you…have a crush on her?" Yanin guessed.
Axel paused.
Crush? Do I? Aeris was pretty, kind, caring. But he wouldn't label it as a crush. He just carried a lot of respect for her.
Instead of answering, Axel leaned in and flicked her forehead.
"Stop thinking weird thoughts. Pervert."
And just like that, he turned and took off. Leaving Yanin to rub her forehead and scowl at his retreating figure.
But even as she stood there alone, that flick still tingling slightly, she had one stubborn, nagging thought in her head:
Axel… never looked at me like that.
…
As Mana Control class went by, he realized that Professor Vale was looking at his direction…too often.
Axel calmed himself down. He was being too paranoid.
When class ended and he was packing up, Selene asked him out.
"Axel" She spoke sweetly. "Do you want to grab ice cream after school?"
"Ice cream?!" Landon interrupted. "Count me in too!"
Selene glared at him, but her expression quickly softened as she turned back to Axel.
"No, I'm busy." Axel answered. Selene's smile faltered, but she continued.
"When are you free?" She asked.
"I don't have an exact answer, but I'll text you when I'm free." He finished packing and left abruptly.
"...Is it just me or was Axel acting strange today?" Landon muttered.
Selene didn't reply, furrowing her eyebrows.
Axel rejected her.
That hurts.
Though, there was a reason why Axel declined. It just wasn't necessary.
From today on, all he would do was follow the plot and only the plot.
He couldn't afford risking OOC anymore.
He didn't want to be sent back to…that timeline again.