*Birth of a Cheeky Prodigy*
"Daddy! Say 'Daddy'! C'mon, kiddo—*Daddy*!"
Qin Tian, the overenthusiastic patriarch of the Qin Clan, dangled a jade rattle over his newborn son's crib like a deranged carnival barker. Little Qin Feng blinked up at him with the unimpressed stare of a baby who'd clearly inherited his mother's sarcastic genes. Every time Qin Tian tried to force the word "Daddy," Qin Feng would burp loudly or giggle like a tiny angelic gremlin, sending his mother, Lady Ling, into peals of laughter that shook her hair ornaments.
"Pathetic," Qin Feng thought, mentally rolling his eyes (a skill he'd mastered in utero). While his "dad" played peek-a-boo, he was busy summoning his *System*—a snarky AI companion only he could hear.
**System Notification:**
*[Ding! Host has ignored parental bonding time for the 47th consecutive day. Achievement unlocked: *Emotionally Unavailable Prodigy* (+0反派点).]*
"Shut up and show me the mall," Qin Feng retorted mentally. The holographic *Villain Value Mall* popped up, displaying items like *Dragon-Slaying Pacifier* (5,000 points) and *Baby Bodhisattva Milk* (8,000 points). Tragically, his balance was a measly 3,000反派点—hardly enough for a decent power-up.
**System Suggestion:**
*[Recommend purchasing *Epiphany Halo* (30 days). Effects: +100x comprehension! Become so smart, you'll make Confucius cry!]*
Qin Feng hesitated. Three thousand points was his life savings! But the *Thirty-Three Heavens Creation Sutra* in his mind whispered promises of immortality—*"Master me, and you'll regenerate from a single eyelash!"* Perfect for a future troublemaker.
"Fine. Buy it."
*[Congratulations! You've traded toddler snacks for god-tier IQ!]* The world suddenly sharpened. Baby Qin Feng's brain began dissecting cosmic truths like a tiny philosopher on espresso.
---
*Three Years Later: Operation Outshine Baby Brother*
By age three, Qin Feng had perfected two skills:
1) Smiling like a cherub while mentally roasting everyone.
2) Exploiting his adorableness to scam cheek kisses from every maiden in the Qin Clan.
"Little Master Feng is *so* polite!" gushed a blushing maid after he pecked her cheek—a "thank you" for her earlier smooch.
**System Notification:**
*[+1反派点 for emotionally manipulating a servant. Classy.]*
"*I'm reciprocating kindness!*" Qin Feng argued. "*Also, I'm three. What's your excuse for being a judgmental AI?*"
Meanwhile, his baby brother Qin Hao—still in their mom's womb—was flexing his *Destined Protagonist* aura. Golden dragons and phoenixes materialized above Lady Ling's belly nightly, as if the universe itself were throwing him a rave.
"Show-off," Qin Feng grumbled. While he'd been stuck grinding basic cultivation levels (*"Hematopexy Realm 9? Lame!"*), Qin Hao was already inventing *celestial-tier* techniques. Even the Qin Clan's ancient founder crawled out of seclusion to name him "Qin Hao—He Who Dares to Poke the Heavens."
---
*Becoming the Flash (Ancient Edition)*
Desperate to outrun his brother's plot armor, Qin Feng splurged his last 4,000反派点 on *Phantom Mirage*, a speed manual described as "*What if Road Runner was a kung fu master?*"
**System Commentary:**
*[Smart choice! Remember: Heroes have plot armor. Villains? We have *sprint armor*.]*
As energy surged through him, Qin Feng's chubby legs blurred. He zipped around his room like a sugar-crazed hummingbird, knocking over ancestral vases and startling the clan's sacred turtle into hiding.
"Who needs flying swords when you've got these gams?!" he cackled, narrowly avoiding a scolding from Nurse Li.
---
*The Final Countdown to Brotherly Warfare*
That night, Qin Feng meditated under the moon, his tiny body radiating the aura of someone who'd just hit the *Kaio-ken* (开元境) breakthrough.
"Finally… *Open Marrow Realm*!" he whispered dramatically, envisioning his丹田 (dantian) as a sparkly galaxy. "*Now I can store enough energy to prank Hao for a century.*"
**System Notification:**
*[Warning: Sibling detected. Activate *Eldest Son Crisis Mode*? Y/N]*
As Qin Feng plotted, Lady Ling's belly glowed ominously. Qin Hao was coming—and with him, a storm of protagonist shenanigans.
"Bring it on, bro," Qin Feng smirked, practicing his *Phantom Mirage* dodges. "This family's gonna need a *looot* of therapy."