Smoke billowed from the cafeteria floor, walls cracked and scorched, and somehow there was a chicken wandering around—no one knew where it came from.
In the middle of the battlefield, two figures lay sprawled out, breathing heavily, arms outstretched like they were reaching for the heavens in their final moments.
Yuki's uniform shirt was barely hanging on by a thread, sparkles still lazily drifting off him as he whispered dramatically, "Tell… Shin… I hate him…"
Aiko, her pigtails messed up and one shoe missing, coughed with flair, "Taa-kun… if I don't make it… burn my math notebook…"
Mei-chan, now standing on the referee table dramatically holding a microphone in one hand and a chicken leg in the other, roared, "AFTER A FIGHT THAT LITERALLY SHATTERED DIMENSIONS… I ANNOUNCE THIS FINAL ROUND… A TIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"
The crowd lost its mind. Boys were weeping. Girls were fainting. That one chicken was clucking proudly on top of a light fixture.
Above the ring, the scoreboard flashed:
YUKI – 100
AIKO – 100
Yuki and Aiko, still on the ground, turned their heads ever so slowly toward the board.
"W-what?" Yuki croaked, blinking through a black eye that was purely for anime dramatic effect.
Mei-chan, still chewing the chicken leg, shouted into the mic, "This round had ended in a draw with both participant receing ewual points. I would like to call Akashi-Kun, out Sis-Con judge, to pass his verdict."
And then, as everyone turned to Shin…
The tall boy slowly stood up, gently moving Ai from his lap. He set her down carefully, brushing her bangs aside.
"I never expected things to go this far," Shin said softly, walking forward.
"Is he gonna say something serious?" someone whispered.
"Oh no, I might cry," another said.
Shin stood between all three girls, placed a hand on his chest, and looked out over the scorched battlefield.
"Over the past hour… I've been made to swoon, laugh, cry, panic, get jealous, and mildly traumatized."
The crowd nodded solemnly.
"But through all of this… I realized something."
Everyone leaned in.
Yuki gulped.
Aiko held her breath.
Even the chicken seemed tense.
And Shin said…
"The real winner is—Ai."
"EH!?" Yuki and Aiko screamed together, standing up in shock.
"Check the scoreboard," Shin said calmly.
They turned.
AI – ∞
"W-WHAAAAT!?" Aiko shrieked.
"WHYYYYYY!?" Yuki shouted.
Ai, already running, tackled Shin in a hug. "Yay! I won! I won, Onii-chan picked me!"
She planted a loud kiss on his cheek and snuggled up like a koala. "I love you, Onii-chan!! I'll be your prize!"
Shin smiled proudly… for one second.
Then Aiko cracked her knuckles.
Yuki rolled up his sleeves.
"Let's kill him," Aiko muttered.
"Agreed," Yuki nodded.
And in perfect anime logic, they both leapt at Shin and started beating the absolute crap out of him with tiny fists of rage, comedy smoke clouds and cartoon sound effects swirling around them.
"UNFAIR!!"
"BIASED!!"
"I SPARKLED SO HARD I GOT A LEG CRAMP!!"
After several minutes of Shin's very public whooping, the girls dusted themselves off and left him lying on the cafeteria floor, twitching.
Yuki sighed. "Let's go to a cafe."
"Yeah. I need cake," Aiko grumbled.
As they walked off, Shin lay face-down, groaning.
"Onii-chaaan!!" Ai wailed, kneeling beside him. "Don't die! I need you! I love you!"
"I'm not dying…" he mumbled weakly, but she was already sobbing dramatically.
Far in the distance, in the golden rays of the setting sun—
"Senpai…" a shy girl said, blushing.
"I-I like you!" said a nervous boy, heart pounding.
"…Me too," she whispered.
The boy fell to his knees. "I'M A GOD!!"
Somewhere nearby, Mei-chan was posing with a group of sweaty boys taking selfies, her cleavage bouncing like it had a life of its own as she shouted, "REMEMBER, I WAS THE REAL STAR OF THIS SHOW!!"
Back on the floor, Shin lay broken, twitching.
"…Why do I feel like I'm the only one who lost?" he groaned.
The camera zoomed out slowly as Ai kept clutching him like he was on his deathbed.
Cue sparkly end screen.
Cue anime outro song.
The End (for now)
---
"Oi, What the hell. We haven't even reached 1000 words." Yuki shouted, breaking the fourth wall.
Author: Sigh... Let me just write a bonus chapter.
"You better." Yuki warned.
Author: "As you wish, my lord."
---
Bonus Scene: "Confession Frenzy & Chicken Pandemonium!"
The sun dipped low over the battle-scarred school grounds, casting a warm orange glow over the cracked tiles and toppled benches. Bits of destroyed desks, fluttering flower petals, and glitter from who-knows-where swirled together in a post-apocalyptic anime romance haze.
And then—like someone pressed the confession button in a dating sim—all at once, the students exploded.
"Sakura-senpai!" a first-year boy shouted, eyes glistening with unshed tears. "I-I've liked you since you joined the gardening club! Please go out with me!"
The tall, graceful third-year girl blinked.
"...I love you too," she said softly.
His soul left his body as he screamed into the sky, "YESSSSS!!"
Nearby, a short, shy girl tugged on her best friend's sleeve. "H-Hana-chan… I always liked you more than just a friend…"
Hana blinked.
Then grinned.
"Took you long enough," she said, and pulled her in for a kiss on the lips.
Screams. Cheers. Applause.
A boy turned to his best friend, heart pounding. "Bro…"
The other boy stared, equally flushed.
"D-do you wanna… kiss and maybe… be boyfriends?"
The silence stretched.
Then the second boy threw his arms around him.
"Hell yeah I do!! I thought I was the only one!"
They kissed passionately to the sounds of boys cheering, other boys crying, and that one chicken jumping up and down on a table nearby.
"B'gawk!" it shouted, flapping its wings dramatically and knocking over someone's juice box.
The chicken, now apparently named Commander Cluck, had taken full ownership of the battle arena. It strutted down the middle of the field, climbing up on a broom handle like it was a war flag and letting out a victorious screech that echoed across campus.
Someone tried to catch it—only to be pecked on the shin and sent running.
"Commander Cluck has no master!" a girl declared, tossing flower petals into the wind like it was a wedding scene.
Meanwhile, on the sidelines—
"MEI-CHAN!!"
The school guards had finally arrived.
Clad in dark security uniforms and looking absolutely done with life, two grumpy middle-aged men marched up to the referee table.
"Miss Mei-chan! This is your fourth violation of the school's public decency policy!" one barked.
Mei-chan—still standing like a supermodel, hips cocked to the side and chest jiggling with every breath—smiled brightly and waved to her adoring fans.
"Y'all are just mad you can't bounce like this!" she said, giving a dramatic pose and causing at least four students to faint.
"That's it! We're dragging you out!"
"Noooo~! I haven't even given my swimsuit speech yet!"
The guards each grabbed one arm and started hauling her away, heels scraping along the tile.
"I'll be back!" Mei-chan wailed dramatically, hair blowing as if a fan was hidden somewhere. "I'll never stop being FABULOUSSSSS!!"
A group of lovestruck boys, newly branded as Mei's Loyal Followers, began marching after her like zombies.
"MEI-SAMAAAA!!"
"TAKE US WITH YOU!!"
"WE'LL BE YOUR SHINING KNIGHTS!!"
They disappeared down the hallway like a bizarre parade of hormonal chaos.
And still…
Still…
In the middle of the field…
Ai knelt beside Shin, clutching his hand, her eyes like waterfalls.
"Onii-chaaaan…" she whimpered.
"I'm not dying, Ai…" he groaned, face flat on the floor, a visible bump forming where Yuki had bonked him.
"You're talking… deliriously!" she cried. "You've lost too much handsomeness!"
"That's not a thing."
"Don't leave meeee!" she sobbed, hugging his chest, cheeks squished against him as sparkles and cherry blossoms floated dramatically around them for no reason at all.
A few students passed by, pausing to look at the scene.
"Is that girl mourning a guy who's clearly blinking and breathing?"
"Anime logic. Let's move on."
Nearby, more chaos bloomed.
"Senpai!" a girl shouted, her short hair bouncing as she ran up to the soccer captain. "I think you're hotter than any shoujo manga protagonist! Will you date me?!"
He blinked. "I'm already dating Kenji."
She blinked. "Oh! That's fine. You guys are cute!"
"Thanks!" Kenji yelled from the bench, throwing a peace sign.
In the background, two rival clubs started fighting.
"You stole our confession spot!"
"It's a free tree, you nerds!"
Punches were thrown.
Someone got smacked with a love letter.
Another couple kissed dramatically behind the fountain while "Ave Maria" inexplicably played from someone's Bluetooth speaker.
A teacher walked out, took one look around, turned right back into the building, and muttered, "I'm not paid enough for this…"
Commander Cluck leapt onto the roof of the school, raising its wings high like a phoenix.
"B'GAAAAAAAAWKK!!"
Students everywhere bowed in respect.
One brave soul whispered, "We follow you now, Commander."
And somewhere in the madness—
A small, nerdy boy finally worked up the courage to face his childhood friend.
"R-Rika…"
"Yeah?"
"I-I like you. Like, like-like you. Do you… maybe wanna be my girlfriend?"
Rika blinked.
Then she smiled.
"I thought you'd never ask."
He blushed so hard he almost exploded, and she giggled as she kissed his cheek.
In the far, far background…
Mei-chan, halfway into the back of a security van, shouted, "IF I DON'T MAKE IT—TELL EVERYONE I WAS LEGENDARYYYYY!!"
The crowd saluted her with sparkling eyes.
And there, at the center of it all, Shin finally sat up, rubbing his sore head.
"…What even is my life?"
Ai immediately hugged him from behind, still sniffling.
"You're alive!! Onii-chan's alive!! I won't let you leave me ever again!!"
"…I was gone for like five seconds…"
She clutched him tighter, now crying happy anime tears with sparkles floating again somehow.
The golden sun set behind the school, casting a romantic glow over the battlefield of love.
The sun had barely started to calm its dramatic spotlight over the school courtyard, but the confession fever had only just begun.
Suddenly—
"TAKUMIIIIIIIII!!!"
A booming voice echoed across the lawn. A tall boy—muscles like a shounen protagonist, shirt slightly unbuttoned—turned in surprise.
A short, serious-looking boy with glasses stood trembling, fists clenched.
"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" he shouted. "I LIKE YOU, TAKUMI! I HAVE FOR A YEAR!"
Takumi blinked.
Everyone froze.
Then Takumi grinned wide.
"I was waiting for you to say it first."
Before anyone could process it, Takumi grabbed the smaller boy, spun him around, and kissed him full on the mouth, dipping him like a freaking romance anime cover. The crowd exploded into cheers, some people throwing notebooks, someone setting off a confetti cannon.
Nearby—
"S-Senpai…?"
A gentle, soft-voiced girl held out a note to her upperclassman. "Please read this…"
The girl with the note nodded, opened it, and her eyes widened as she read:
> Every time you smile, my heart does a backflip. I want to walk home with you, hold your hand, and maybe… share a kiss. Will you be mine?
She looked up, blushing. "You wrote this… for me?"
"I did."
Tears filled her eyes. "Then… let's start walking home together."
A soft kiss followed, light and warm as petals on the wind.
"B'gawk," muttered Commander Cluck, watching from atop a broken vending machine like a benevolent guardian.
And then—
The entire courtyard gasped.
A boy had fallen to one knee in front of his long-time girlfriend.
"Yuna," he said, voice trembling. "We've been dating for two years. You're the weirdest, funniest, most beautiful chaos goblin I've ever met. I don't want to just graduate with you…"
He opened a box.
A glittery candy ring.
"I want to MARRY you. Say yes?"
Yuna tackled him to the ground with tears and kisses. "YES YOU ABSOLUTE DORK!! YES!!"
Applause. Tears. Half the school fainted from romantic overload.
And then… Commander Cluck stepped down.
Wearing a tiny red bowtie someone had put on him, he strutted forward with purpose.
There she stood: the elegant, mysterious white hen from the Home Ec class—the one no one had ever dared approach.
The courtyard hushed.
Commander Cluck gently dropped a single corn kernel at her feet.
"B'gawk."
The white hen paused. Looked down. Peered up at him.
And then…
She clucked softly and leaned in, touching beaks.
They kissed.
SOMEONE BLEW A FREAKING TRUMPET.
"WE'RE WITNESSING HISTORY!!" screamed a student sobbing into a bouquet of carnations.
And still, more confessions poured in—
"I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE A DELINQUENT!" a girl yelled to a tall, spiky-haired boy. "I LOVE YOU!"
He scratched his head.
"…I've been knitting you scarves all year. I love you too."
"I KNEW IT!"
They kissed aggressively.
A cool, androgynous upperclassman adjusted their glasses, approached the nervous girl in the literature club.
"I admire your writing," they said. "And also your face."
The girl blushed to her ears. "Do… do you wanna date?"
"I was hoping you'd ask."
They kissed by the lockers, surrounded by floating books and blushing poets.
One boy climbed a tree with a megaphone.
"I'M IN LOVE WITH SOUTA-KUN!"
From the other side of the courtyard, Souta cupped his hands around his mouth.
"COME DOWN HERE AND KISS ME THEN!"
The boy leapt off the tree and actually landed safely, because anime logic.
And they kissed under the tree.
Meanwhile, a girl who had rejected 30 boys in the past year turned, red-faced, to her childhood friend.
"I turned them down because I liked you, idiot!"
The guy blinked. "Wait. Really? But I—"
Before he could finish, she kissed him with all her pent-up frustration.
Around them, cheering intensified.
Another student passed by with a full-on wedding bouquet. "This is the best day of my life and I didn't even confess to anyone."
Someone else shouted, "I FOUND A GIRLFRIEND! AND A BOYFRIEND! I'M DATING BOTH!"
"POLY RIGHTS!!"
More confetti cannons exploded. No one knew where they were coming from anymore.
And through it all—
Ai was still dramatically crying over Shin, who was lying on his back, eating Pocky like nothing had happened.
"I love you, Onii-chan…"
"I know."
"I'd marry you if I could…"
"You've said that five times."
"I'll say it five more—!"
"Can we… not do this in the middle of a mass confession event?"
"No."
As sparkles and petals continued to rain from the sky, Mei-chan's voice echoed from the security van being driven away—
"YOU CAN'T SILENCE MY BOUNCE!!!"
And her followers chased after the van screaming, "MEI-SAMAAAAAA!!!"
Somewhere, someone in the crowd shouted, "I just realized… I actually don't have a crush!"
The person next to them replied, "Same! Let's go get boba and just be chaotic besties!"
They fist-bumped.
And from atop the roof, Commander Cluck wrapped one wing around his new hen-wife.
They gazed upon their kingdom of confessions.
Today… was a win for love.
This day would go down in school history as the most chaotic, hilarious, emotionally explosive confession day of all time.
Even Commander Cluck crowed proudly from the rooftop as the curtain fell.
---
END OF CHAPTER : 25 : CONCLUSION/CHAOS!
---