"I'm such an idiot!"
At exactly noon, a miserable scream shook the Yamazakura gang's headquarters.
Doma, jolted awake from a nightmare, shouted with tears in his eyes.
Why, oh why, did he have to come up with that stupid story instead of just trading the Yamazakura tree for a hundred cherry blossom trees?!
The shout also woke up their good neighbor, Hanabana-san, who lived nearby.
But all he did was mumble, "Useless trash," roll over, and go back to sleep.
'These fools couldn't even make Hojou stay for five extra minutes.'
'Pathetic. With a gang like this in Katsushika Ward, I'm honestly ashamed.'
Meanwhile, at Soubu High School—
Class 1-F had an unusually high number of absentees today.
Six students were missing, including Hojou Kyousuke and Yamauchi Sakura.
The whole class was buzzing with speculation, everyone trying to guess what big thing Kyousuke could be up to this time.
After all, the only time he'd taken a leave of absence before was when he went to pick up a Bookstore Award.
Normally, you'd expect the internet to have the answer right away.
With the sheer number of Kyousuke fans, even the tiniest clue would usually get leaked online instantly.
But today's situation was strangely murky.
Some claimed they'd seen Hojou Kyousuke in Gunma, racing up Mount Haruna, even declaring that his gang, the Rampaging Angels, had seized control of the sacred biker turf there.
But anyone who knew him even a little laughed that rumor off.
Sure, Hojou might be the leader of a biker gang, but he'd always preached safe driving above all else.
Ever since he became the second-generation boss of the Rampaging Angels, traffic police in Bunkyō Ward hadn't managed to hit their traffic fine quotas for years.
Of course, it wasn't because the gang had suddenly turned law-abiding.
After all, if you get fined by the cops, can you even still call yourself a Rampaging gang?
The real reason fines dropped was because the gang had gotten stricter—about others.
If an Angel stopped properly at a "Stop" sign, looked both ways for three seconds, and some impatient driver tried to run through, that driver would immediately receive a deadly glare.
If they still ignored it, chances were they'd get forced to stop and receive a very "physical" lesson on traffic safety.
Normally, news like this would get laughed off.
But this time, things took a turn when anonymous users online started reporting they'd seen an unusually slow motorcycle crawling up Mount Haruna last night.
That alone wasn't proof, but then—someone posted a photo.
In the picture, a gorgeous girl with an over-the-top radiant smile was flashing a peace sign at the camera.
Beside her was a man, only his arm showing.
Even though most of the photo was cropped, everyone immediately recognized him as Hojou Kyousuke.
Because tied around that wrist was the unmistakable red-and-blue cord he always wore—since the very first day he appeared in public.
At first, people thought it was just some kind of charm, but that theory got debunked by a well-known netizen who went by the name Cyber Miko.
According to her, that red-and-blue cord was no ordinary string—it was a sacred hair tie imbued with a thousand years of shrine maiden power.
And it wasn't just a charm.
It was a love token given to Hojou Kyousuke by the Divine Shrine Maiden herself.
With that photo, the rumors solidified—famous high school author Hojou Kyousuke had indeed spent his after-school hours racing up Mount Haruna.
Netizens were left in awe of just how colorful his life was.
While normal students went for karaoke after club activities, he went on expeditions to Gunma.
"Shou-chan, Shou-chan! Is this news true?"
Yui Yuigahama's peach-pink eyes sparkled as she looked at Nishimiya Shouko.
Today, Shouko was wearing her hair the same way as Yui, and that could only mean one thing—their friendship had just leveled up!
Like Yui, plenty of others had gathered around Shouko, even those further away straining their ears to listen.
After all, this was juicy gossip about Hojou-kun. Who wouldn't want to hear it?
If Hojou Kyousuke himself had been in class, no one would dare crowd Shouko like this.
Sure, she was ridiculously kind, but her two "bodyguards" were another story. But since he wasn't here today…
Shouko smiled softly, delivering exactly what everyone wanted:
"Mm~ Kyousuke-kun really did go for a drive in Gunma yesterday. He even brought back some local treats."
As she spoke, she reached into her desk drawer and pulled out a lunchbox.
Opening the lid revealed steaming hot spring manju—souvenirs from Gunma that Kyousuke had brought back.
Her family had already eaten plenty, but there were still more than enough to share with her friends at school.
"Wah! Really? I can eat this?" Yui asked excitedly.
"Mm. It's not as good as eating them fresh, but the taste is still pretty nice," Shouko replied with a gentle smile, nudging the lunchbox forward to invite everyone to share.
For her, this kind of thing was second nature.
Sharing food as a gesture of goodwill—simple, humble, and incredibly effective.
The very first time she followed Hojou-kun's advice back in middle school and brought some of his homemade snacks to class.
She saw how warmly her classmates reacted, and from that moment, she understood.
Ever since then, even after joining the agency, she'd carried on the habit.
Of course, this method didn't work for everyone.
Handing out treats too often made people dependent, and once they got used to it, missing a day meant trouble.
"Why didn't you bring snacks today? Did something happen? Can't you just go buy some right now?"
No one knew this better than Yui Yuigahama, the undisputed master of reading the mood.
'So that's it… it wasn't me they wanted as a friend, but my wallet.'
Such was life.
But Nishimiya Shouko never had to worry about that.
Not because her kindness magically melted every heart, but because standing right behind her was Kyousuke—the guy who could literally kick someone eight meters through the air.
To outsiders, her snacks weren't a bribe; they were simply a token of genuine goodwill.
Anyone lucky enough to receive them was expected to be grateful from the bottom of their heart.
And Yuigahama could see this crystal clear.
As everyone praised the Gunma hot spring buns and debated whether eating them might have beauty benefits, Yui leaned closer and quietly pointed at the photo.
"Shou-chan… that girl—what's her relationship with Hojou-kun?"
For some reason, she felt nervous asking, her cheeks warming with embarrassment.
'Ugh, why am I blushing like a teapot on boil?'
'Even if she's Hojou-kun's girlfriend, that has nothing to do with me!'
Still… the girl really was beautiful.
Her chest was at least two cup sizes bigger than Yui's, her waist was slender, her fashion stylish and a little daring.
If Yui were a boy, she'd probably like that type of girl too.
Definitely not someone like herself—still a virgin, still single well into high school.
'Sigh…'
Yui let out a little breath.
But then, when she looked at Shouko, her mood lifted again.
'At least I have my hairstyle. Thank you, Shou-chan, for wearing the same hairdo as me today!' she thought earnestly, silently giving thanks.
But asking "quietly" was impossible in a room packed with curious classmates.
The moment Yui's words left her lips, every girl nearby stopped chewing.
"Yeah, Shou-chan! Could it be… she's actually Hojou-kun's girlfriend?"
Hina Ebina, half-rim glasses flashing, slammed her hands down on the desk and leaned forward with sparkling eyes.
"So Hojou-kun's into that type, huh? With a figure like that, she must be a model. Ugh, so jealous~"
At the back of the classroom, the boys who had been fooling around stopped to listen.
Tobe Kakeru clasped his hands over his chest, swooning like he was lovestruck, and even tried to steal a kiss from Hayama Hayato.
Who immediately shoved him away while smiling wryly.
'Ha? Are you an idiot? Which of your eyes saw that plastic-looking woman as Hojou's girlfriend?'
'Even a gorilla's brain would make more sense than yours!'
'Whether it's Yamauchi-san or Nishimiya-san, both of them are a thousand—no, ten thousand—times better than her, you moron!'
Hikigaya Hachiman raged internally, though on the outside, he calmly pretended to be absorbed in a mobile game.
Behind him, Zaimokuza Yoshiteru sat in the same pose, but unlike Hachiman, his bulky frame made it impossible to hide the way his eyes kept darting toward the commotion.
His cowardly I-wanna-join-but-I'm-too-scared look was so obvious that Hachiman silently thanked the God he hadn't spoken to him.
Otherwise, he'd be dragged into being ostracized too.
"Hey, Hachiman~ You're in the kendo club with Hojou-kun, right? You must know more. Is that girl really his girlfriend?"
He didn't even look up.
The moment that voice reached his ears, Hachiman felt his entire skeleton go soft, his body floating like it had sprouted wings.
"Say it again!"
His Adam's apple bobbed, then he lowered his voice to a solemn, almost desperate tone.
"Huh?"
Totsuka Saika tilted his head, puzzled, his innocent expression shattering Hachiman's composure in an instant.
"Please—repeat what you just said! I'm begging you, this is the one request of my entire life!" he cried, bracing both hands on the desk before slamming his forehead down onto it with a heavy thud.