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I couldn't sleep
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It's 11 p.m.
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I think my ceiling needed a clean, there are a few cobwebs on the corners.
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My mom's words keep echoing in my mind, but the one sentence she said after the meal gets a particular spotlight..
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"You told me that you were happy to finally get your own role and not just act as the younger version of another actress."
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Did the past me think like that?
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So enthusiastic
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I tried to remember those times with my weak memory.
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What was it like back then?
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Was I so happy just to say a few lines?
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Even after all that effort, I still can't remember anything, neither can I remember being so optimistic about something.
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Ah...My head hurts.
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As if time travel is not enough material to think about.
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'Spring...Breeze...'
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I don't remember much from that drama. I only remembered that it got mediocre reception.
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Whatever, who cares.
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I'll just go through this and see what I can do.
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I barely have any screentime anyways, It'll basically be a nostalgic trip and then I'll go back and everything is gonna be fine.
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Sounds great.
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But what if I'm stuck here, forever?
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Now what?
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I want to scream.
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Probably while running in a field.
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It's so confusing, I couldn't wrap my head around it.
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If this is real, then I just time travelled.
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If this isn't real, I am having a weirdly detailed dream and something abnormal is going on. I might be completely knocked out.
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Maybe even in a critical condition, after all I got into a car crash.
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Wait, what if I'm dead?
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This is bad.
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What if I'm having that flashback moment that's always included whenever someone is going to die?
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Oh no, no, no.
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I can't die yet!
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I sat back up.
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But what should I do?
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I don't even know what's happening.
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How could I solve a problem that I don't even understand?
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It would be good to do something I liked.
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Although I knew it was likely to be so.
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Think of it like a last rodeo, a final fantasy, something of the sort.
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I'll have fun, enjoy shooting for the last time and finally focus on my studies to get into a nice university.
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If I actually time traveled, which I heavily suspected to be the case, I would be doing a huge favor for myself.
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I will get a nice job that pays well and I'll go on frequent vacations and...Maybe I'll act for fun once in a while.
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Just for fun, nothing more.
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It's seems the perfect solution.
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Isn't this the reversal I always longed for?
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I don't know, but there is something in the back of mind just preventing me from going completely lax.
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In the morning, I told my mom that I am going to participate in Spring Breeze and her smile looked like the spring breeze.
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"I knew it! You said you didn't want to act, but you had that stare. Like you are unwilling to give up your favorite toy."
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"I know you too well to not see the signs."
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Did I?
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" Well, you'd better not change your mind after we sign the contract, otherwise it'll be complicated and I'll really hate you." My mom joked, a cheeky grin on her lips.
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"By the way Ha-na, why aren't you prepared for school?"
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"Huh...School?"
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It suddenly dawned on me that I am now a 15 year old who unfortunately still has to go to school.
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Unfortunately again, I have forgotten everything by now.
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I don't even know which class I belonged to, what subject is taught today.
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I've forgotten everything about school.
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I wanted to curse.