Because it had been Dumbledore's birthday the night before, the entire dining room had been left in complete chaos. Everyone had been too tired and sleepy to clean up before heading off to bed.
And since Sirius had sent Kreacher off to Hogwarts, there wasn't even a house-elf around to help tidy the place.
In the end, all of it fell to Dumbledore, who woke up earliest the next morning.
Older people needing less sleep had its downsides too.
At least Dumbledore was quite good at household magic. That much deserved praise.
Kasenhis could practically be considered the last person to wake up.
No, actually, he was the third-to-last.
But what truly left him completely baffled was...
"Why are you two staying in the same room?"
Kasenhis stared in confusion at Lupin and Tonks as they walked out through the same door next to his.
Lupin immediately looked like ants were crawling all over his body. But with other people watching, he couldn't exactly start scratching and wriggling around like a monkey. So he merely shifted awkwardly, curled one hand into a fist and held it unnaturally in front of his mouth, while a strange colour spread across his face.
The whole person looked...
Like some awkward scholar from an old comedy.
Tonks, on the other hand, was much more straightforward.
She looked at Lupin, then at Kasenhis.
"You didn't know?"
Kasenhis's mouth opened slightly.
"What exactly was I supposed to know? Nobody told me anything."
Tonks immediately turned on Lupin.
"Why doesn't Kasenhis know? Didn't you promise me you'd tell everyone?"
"Wait, wait, wait. What I want to know right now is what the hell your relationship actually is!" Kasenhis said.
Lupin: "Dating."
Tonks: "Engaged."
Tonks frowned and turned to Lupin.
"Didn't we agree to get married? I'm already wearing the engagement ring!"
"The problem is, does right now really look like a good time to get married? We should at least wait until Voldemort is completely dead," Lupin argued.
"You two look exactly like old generals with death flags stuck all over your backs," Kasenhis commented quietly.
"What does that mean?" Lupin asked.
"You've never seen this in stories or novels? Whenever a couple runs into danger, they always say things like, 'Wait until I come back,' 'Wait until we're safe,' 'Wait until this is over,' or 'Once I retire from this life, we'll come back and get married.' Then one of them ends up dying out there."
Kasenhis shrugged.
"I don't think we'll be that unlucky," Lupin said, rubbing his chin.
"Mm-hm. There's also the possibility that both of you die together," Kasenhis explained.
"So how long exactly are you planning to drag this out? I'm starting to think you're just a coward," Tonks said with her hands on her hips.
"It's mainly... could you step away for a moment? I need to talk to Kasenhis about something," Lupin said quietly.
"What the fuck? There's something you won't tell your wife, but you'll tell Kasenhis?" Tonks snapped angrily.
"Ahem. It's difficult to explain. Difficult to explain," Lupin hurriedly tried to smooth things over.
Tonks looked even more confused.
"No? You're pretty good, though?"
"Not in that way." Lupin awkwardly shoved Tonks back into the room, then dragged Kasenhis into his own room and cast a Silencing Charm.
Kasenhis looked Lupin up and down.
"So? I still don't know what exactly you find so difficult to talk about... infertility?"
"Not that kind of problem. Can't you be serious for once?" Lupin stared at Kasenhis speechlessly.
"Okay, okay. Go ahead."
"You already mentioned the problem just now. What happens to Tonks if we get married and then I die? If I die before we get married, she can sleep it off, have a few drinks, forget about me, and move on with her life. But if I die after we're married? Then she'll be a widow."
"Actually, that wouldn't even be the worst outcome. At least she'd be the widow of someone who died fighting. But what if I don't die? What if I end up crippled, insane, mentally broken, or cursed into something barely human? Are you really expecting her to spend the rest of her life looking after someone like that? That wouldn't be fair to her," Lupin said quietly.
Kasenhis looked at him and curled his lip.
"You really do have a rich inner life."
"I... just think about things too much."
Knock, knock, knock...
The window of Kasenhis's room was suddenly tapped.
Both of them looked over and saw Sirius outside, holding a small glass scraper and waving at them.
Kasenhis and Lupin exchanged a glance, then walked over.
"What is it?" Lupin asked.
Sirius rubbed his chin.
"If you're worried Tonks won't be able to move on after you die, you really don't need to worry. I'm handsome, cultured, and good in a fight. If you die, I'll steal Tonks away for you. I guarantee she won't even remember you."
"Hmm," Lupin nodded, then pulled out his wand and pointed it at Sirius.
"Crucio!"
Although Lupin only used the Cruciatus Curse for an instant, the pain was still enough to send Sirius straight into free fall, using gravitational acceleration to attack the lawn below.
"Can't you evaluate the situation properly?" Kasenhis said, utterly speechless. "We've already forced Voldemort into coming up with that four-Tom plan on the spot. Can't you have even the slightest optimistic attitude toward the future battle to wipe out the Death Eaters?"
"Exactly. And honestly, maybe you should consider my proposal."
Sirius limped his way back upstairs and spoke as he pushed the door open.
"If I remember correctly, Tonks is related to you," Lupin said, looking at Sirius with contempt.
"That's an old European tradition."
Bang!
Kasenhis hit Sirius with a fully charged punch and sent him flying back out the window again.
Kasenhis straightened his collar.
"Let's get back to arranging your wedding with Tonks. Given the current situation, we won't make it a huge affair. But what about your parents and Tonks's parents? Give me their addresses."
Lupin faintly sensed something...
Tension.
And just a tiny bit of coercion.
But would a real man, the bravest man in all of Hogwarts and Black's old house, allow Kasenhis to pressure him?
"I need to come back in and say something... Tonks just told me that she might be... pregnant."
"I agree to the wedding. I'm going to write to my father right now."
Lupin walked straight toward the desk without even a second of hesitation.
...
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