Everyone in life has a reason for living, I've been told.
Everything happens for a reason, everyone has a purpose in life. You can't live in this world without one.
And yet I don't know how I'm alive, I clearly don't have a purpose. I just wake up, go to school, do assignments and be a good daughter.
That's not a purpose, it's a chore. An annoying one, the type that suffocates me. Makes me see the world in a poisonous green, makes me want jump sometimes.
Because I'm just existing, just living, like a leaf flowing idly in the wind waiting to be crunched beneath someone's feet.
Then, she popped up in my life. Not some angel or dainty lily that sees good in everything. A literal hurricane that whirled into my classroom's door before the teacher even called her inside. Ruby Carson, some gaming YouTuber that games more than she pays attention in class.
I honestly don't know how we became friends, she seemed pretty surprised when I stated I don't play games, don't do clubs and don't have hobbies.
Unless cleaning is a hobby now, but somehow we just clicked. Maybe it's because I tutored her while she kept bullies the hell away from me, then one fine Friday afternoon she recommended something to me.
"There's new game called Timeless Melodies, you should try it- why you staring at me like I offered you drugs?" Ruby asked, her blonde hair pulled in a messy bun while her emerald eyes stared at me with confused amusement.
"Maybe because you are?" I replied. "I don't do games"
"Because you haven't gotten the right one, just try it Jade. If you try it and hate it. I'll pretend this discussion never happened." Ruby begged doing some face that was supposed to be cute to guys. But sadly I'm a girl so yea it didn't really work but then it did?
It did. I ended up downloading the game and playing it everytime I finished my homeworks, I got addicted like if I was taking in drugs.
I could do two rounds in nearly an hour, and would sometimes play till midnight or until my mother took the phone for two weeks, that's how I only did twelve chapters of the game within only two weeks. My phone got seized for next two weeks but I realized something.
I got this nasty feeling anytime I saw the MC, well actually anytime I remembered these characters aren't real and therefore can't love me and only love the main character not the person playing the main character. I got jealous, jealous of the main character's life, jealous that she actually has a purpose and sort of happy while I'm in my final year of senior high and don't know which university I want to go to, I don't even know what course to offer. She has five brothers plus some minor characters falling for her while my last relationship only lasted a month because my ex claimed I wasn't intimate enough for him.
Yes, apparently being freaked out of PDA is bad for relationships, I never knew. Probably because that was my first and last relationship but I honestly don't care. I do care that for some reason I'm jealous of the character I play as. That's weird right? It means I'm probably going insane and need an asylum, or maybe I should try self-isolation?
"Ow! Ruby, the hell?" I winced as I felt my toe throb from how hard Ruby had stepped on it, she looked at me with this expression that says she had been trying to get my attention but I definitely had zoned out.
"What are you thinking about?" She asked, her pale skin a contrast to the blood red dress she was in, we were in a café. The one we normally go to after school before riding our bikes home.
"Life" I mumble while playing the straw of my empty boba cup, Ruby looked at me with a questioning stare so I continued. "I'm thinking about how boring my life is, how I always fade in the background like a side character in my own life. I'm just existing, I feel like I'm going to die like this. Alone, worthless and unloved." I say while staring at the empty cup in front of me.
"So you don't wanna die a virgin? Simple, get laid." Ruby concluded.
The actual fuck?
"First of all, ew. I'm not getting laid at the age of seventeen that's fucked up in every sense of the word. And meant....." I trailed off, taking in a deep breath before adding "I wished my life was more interesting like the main character of Timeless Melodies."
Ruby nodded with understanding eyes "Gangbang? I gotcha."
I facepalmed wondering how long she could live with a gameless phone, she must have guessed my thoughts as her face softened. "Sorry, I'm not good with emotional stuff, why not try getting more friends?" She advised as we left the café and rode home on our bikes.
More friends? Ruby's advice stayed in my mind longer than I would like to admit, my mom had finally given me back my phone, on dead battery so it was currently charging as I stared outside my window lost in my thoughts.
How on earth am I going to make more friends? I don't even remember how I befriended Ruby. Maybe if I pray hard I can have a friend?
Too bad I don't believe in any deity. My thoughts were interrupted when I saw the lights of the house adjacent to mine switch on. To be specific, the bedroom lights.
I watched as a boy who seemed older than me by possibly a year or two walked inside with wet, messy black hair and the darkest shade of blue eyes I've ever seen, his jacket's zip was opened revealing he wasn't wearing a shirt as a droplet of water trickled down from his chest down south.
Was this legal? I don't even know why I'm asking, is it single for me to be watching him or is it legal for him to wearing what's he's wearing?
Probably the first one.
"You overthink a lot, has someone told you?" A voice smooth as silk whispered in my ear, I tilted my head and jumped off my seat as I stared at a woman with long blonde hair that seemed to glow, violet eyes that looked like it contains galaxies and a smile that spelled trouble. I'm screwed, I can tell.
The mysterious figure is claded in a sleeveless glittery black lace dress that reached the floor. Her arms had writings on it that glowed and the language unclear.
"Who.... who are you?" I asked, my voice sounding odd, the woman grinned like she was definitely planning something bad.
"I'm Lucia. And I'm a goddess." She hummed. I'm definitely on drugs, either that or I'm mentally ill.
"And you're here because?" I ask, my eyebrows furrowing.
"Well I overheard you saying something about wanting your life to be more interesting and the rest of the gods are bored badly and want entertainment. So I've decided to strike two birds with one stone, you're going to entering the game of Timeless Melodies to entertain them." She explained to me as if she was talking to a child.
And I laughed because I'm hundred percent sure now that I am mentally ill, because deities don't exist. Right?
"Nice prank but please leave before I call the cops." I laughed, getting up while still laughing.
Lucia didn't find that funny.
"How? You're phone is dead Jade." She stated, with these eyes that literally pierced through my soul. I didn't tell her my name or that my phone is dead, I wanted to speak but I couldn't.
"Here's what's gonna happen, you'll be entering the game, whether you believe in gods or not. Good bye." She said as a pink smoke engulfed me, filling my senses with the scent of lillies and cherries while gradually lost consciousness.
The last thing I heard was a thud and the last thing I saw was the blue carpet on my floor.