It was very difficult to argue with the part of her that was convinced last night had been a dream. Neither logic nor common sense was on her side. She clung to the parts that couldn't be her invention, like the open windows on her computer about vampires; or the scent of Emmett's soap. She was sure something like that could never have been a product of her own dreams. And she managed to confirm it when, after hearing a noise at the window, she looked out and saw him standing in the yard below.
It was still dark. Moonlight streamed into the room.
—What are you doing here?—she asked, frowning.
Nell sensed him smiling down there in the darkness.
—You said you wanted answers.
—And you thought it would be a good idea to give them at four in the morning?
He shrugged.
—It's the best time. And in any case, you're already awake.
Nell made a gesture with her thumb, pointing over her shoulder.
—I can go back to sleep.
Emmett put a hand to his chin.
—I don't know if that's a good idea. I mean, how often do you get the chance to meet a vampire? And I'm talking about a real one, of course.
—Are you trying to blackmail me?
—Does it work?—His dimples appeared as he smiled cheekily.
—No.
—Oh, come on—he insisted—. I promise you won't regret it.
Nell hesitated. She didn't want to go out at night, to an unknown place, no matter how many answers she wanted to get. She looked him in the eye, and that was the straw that broke the camel's back.
—Ahrg, fine! I'll do it!.— She pointed at him—Stay there, I'll go change.
After wrapping herself up warm and slipping into her old, worn sneakers, she left the house. Steve was a heavy sleeper, but there were few days when he slept through the night. Usually, he spent his time writing until dawn. So it was her lucky day.
Once outside, she approached him and said:
—I imagine we'll be going on the "Emmett Air Express".
A guttural laugh came out of his mouth.
—Shh! You're going to wake up my brother.—she scolded, tapping her on the arm. It didn't move him an inch.
Emmett ignored that.
—So you decided to call my piggyback ride that?
Nell turned as red as a tomato and looked away.
—It's the best I could come up with. Are we going or what?
—Of course.
The next second, Emmett took her arm and settled her on his back like the other time. She closed her eyes and waited for the torment to end; however, it seemed eternal. She opened her eyes a little to see what was happening. They had headed north, taking back streets and following a path that led them to the forest. When she stopped, Emmett did so abruptly.
—How was your trip in first class?— he asked as he released her and she fell to the ground sitting down.
She narrowed her eyes.
—You mean tourist class.—She got up and shook off her clothes before inspecting the place.
There was a lake. Considering there were a billion lakes in the state, she didn't know which one it was. The place where they had stopped was not very large: an area populated with bushes and stone seats with ivy. A narrow path of packed earth led to the water. In the distance, the surface of the lake shone under the stars. And on the other side of the lake, you could see the forest.
Nell turned to Emmett.
—Why are we here exactly?
—Sometimes, I come here to think— He looked at the sky and, after a moment, looked at her—It's pretty, peaceful. I thought you were going to like it.— He smiled brazenly.
Nell looked away on purpose.
—Let's get this over with.— She sat down on one of the stone benches and crossed her arms—You promised you'd give me answers, and you made me wait a whole day for it. I'm not leaving empty-handed.
Emmett, with a quick and graceful movement, sat down next to her. Leaving behind a slight gust of wind.
—First question?
He pierced her with his gleaming black eyes. She had to look away to recover. Fighting against the temptation.
—Well... That night you said you knew where I was going to be. How is that? Some kind of ability?
—Yes, but not mine. But my sister´s, Alice. She sees things. Things that could happen, the things that are coming. But it's very subjective. The future always changes.
Nell was thoughtful.
—Did she see me that night in the woods?
—Not only that. —He looked at her steadily and spoke with certainty—She saw you coming.
He was referring to Forks. Alice had predicted her arrival.
—But, if the future changes all the time, how...?—
—Did I find you?— Emmett finished.
Instead of answering, she nodded.
—If you make a decision, it will take you down one path. But if you change your mind, it will take you down another. Alice can see those changes; that flash of possibilities. And when she saw you that day, fate didn't change.
—Let's see if I understand, if I didn't go to the forest that day, would she have seen the change in my decision?
He nodded.
—That's right.
Both were silent.
—Was that all you wanted to know?—he asked mockingly.
She gave him a grim and wry smile.
—I'm just getting started.
A few minutes later, she discovered that all vampires had something characteristic about them, such as speed, beauty, and strength, but that each one also had their own peculiarity. In Emmett's case it was super strength. She also learned that vampires never slept and that the thirst for human blood was very difficult to endure.
—But aren't animals enough?—she wanted to know.
—It doesn't completely satisfy the appetite, well, more like the thirst, but it keeps us strong enough to resist... most of the time.—His voice sounded like the past—Sometimes it's harder than others.
—Is it very difficult for you now?
He watched her in a kind and intense way. Nell maintained eye contact.
—Right now, yes.—He leaned in and curved the corners of his lips—But don't worry, I'm not going to drink your blood. I have a refined palate.
She gave him a little nudge with her shoulder.
—But... I admit that I was once a monster.—He seemed, suddenly, crestfallen. —I didn't care about taking a life if it was to satisfy my thirst.
Nell stood with her arms crossed, thinking.
—Well... I guess being a vampire is like being in the middle of the desert without a single drop of water. And when you find it, you fight for it so it doesn't get lost. I think this is the same: a constant struggle of appetite. However, you learned to control yourself and, from what I see, you are convinced that you don't want to go back.
Emmett smiled, like in a sigh.
—You're good with words.
Nell chuckled.
—Thanks.—She raised her knees on the bench and then commented—You know? I have a theory.
He frowned curiously.
—A theory?
—Yes. I investigated that ultraviolet light thing, and I know it was a lie. So rambling in my mind, I've realized that drugs also generate that particular effect; with the pupils, I mean. And assuming that blood is like a drug, the same effect arises, right? In other words, when you're hungry, your pupils dilate. But when you've already fed, they have the usual golden color.
He raised his eyebrows in surprise.
—You are very observant.
Nell didn't answer, she just listened to the sound of his laughter.
—Unless... you've only been observant with me.—He said with his favorite mischievous smile.
She rolled her eyes.
—You're digressing—she remarked, avoiding looking at his face.
He gave a measured smile.
—Your theory is correct, my lady.
Nell turned her head towards him quickly.
—Really?—When Emmett nodded, she began to twist a strand of hair. She had that habit from time to time—And... are you thirsty now? I mean, I'm sure you are but... Are you very thirsty?
She felt angry, almost stupid asking those things. Instead, Emmett seemed amused.
—Yes, I'm thirsty. But I'm fine. I haven't reached my limit yet.
—And why haven't you fed?—she wanted to know.
For a second, he paused, as if he was deciding whether to say something or not.
—Because I wanted to make sure you were safe.
His gaze was so intense that it shook her to the core.
—You mean that day in the forest?
—No. I mean every day— he revealed—Carlisle told me that you weren't okay.
—In other words, you were spying on me.—Nell made a disappointed noise with her mouth—I didn't know you were a stalker.
He crossed his arms, indignant.
—I'm not a stalker. I just wanted to make sure you were okay—Then, his gaze penetrated her like all the times before—Are you?
For a second, she lowered her gaze to her gloved hands.
—I think so.
Emmett lowered his head.
—Now I have a question for you—he said, without waiting for an answer—What is the real reason why you wear those gloves?
Nell got nervous.
—What do you mean?—she asked, looking at him cautiously.
—I mean I don't think you have a phobia of germs.—for a strange moment, both looked at each other without speaking—It's okay if you don't want to tell me, after all, it's your decision. But don't try to fool me, you're easy to read when you do.
She was offended.
—Yeah, easy to read. —although, after thinking about it for a moment, she felt safe to talk—You had told me that you didn't want to be a monster; and I told you that you weren't. —she slowly took off her gloves—Because I know what a real monster does.—Then she showed him the scars on her hands. Zigzagging and thick burns that contrasted with her skin tone—My father had ways of taking out his anger: alcohol, my mother, or me. I was just a girl, I couldn't do anything. More than endure the pain.
Emmett was more serious than usual.
—Were your brothers also mistreated?
Nell denied.
—Only psychologically.—She bit her lip—But there's a reason why my father did it. A specific reason.—She made a little pause—I have... an ability. It's something I can do since I was a child and that I can't control...—he watched her with intrigue, prompting her to continue—Every time I touch something or someone, I can feel things. To know things. And I'm not talking about seeing the future. My gift goes in retrospect; like a camera that captures memories. It's... difficult even to explain.
He was silent for a moment before continuing.
—Would you like to touch me?— he suggested, in a condescending tone—So you could know more things about me.
She narrowed her eyes like a couple of slits. Emmett seemed to enjoy exasperating her.
—Thanks, but I'll pass.
—You can't hide behind some gloves forever.
She snorted angrily and looked away.
—Who are you? My brother?
—I see I'm not the only one who tells you that.
Nell grimaced, disgruntled.
—It's not that I don't want to. It's just that it's very difficult. I mean, to connect with your gift to such an extent that you can't turn it off afterwards. As if there was only an on switch and nothing else.
Emmett looked ahead, but she didn't know if he was observing the lake or not.
—Maybe you're fighting against it. You reject it because the mere idea of losing control scares you; although, maybe, that's what it takes to learn to control it.
Her voice was deeply skeptical:
—Are you telling me to lose control?
—Exactly.— He turned to look at her. Nell frowned, not understanding, so he laughed—Listen, it's not that I'm an expert on the subject, but as far as I know, gifts are given to people who can handle them. And hands as pure as yours don't need gloves to cover them.
A bitter laugh escaped her.
—Pure?—she highlighted—They are stained wherever you look.
—I wasn't referring to the external.
—Neither was I.
Nell looked away. Above their heads, a bird chirped. The air was cold and clear, but she didn't feel cold.
—When I was a child, I once went for a walk in the forest near my house.—she began to relate faintly—I liked to use my gift with plants because they were predictable; I saw the same growth process over and over again. Until one day I came across a rabbit.—She gave a sad laugh—It's not that I saw something out of this world when I touched it, but for a six-year-old girl, seeing that a tracking dog was about to kill a rabbit, was quite terrifying. Enough so that I accidentally ended up killing it herself. She had squeezed it too hard when she was in a trance, and when she returned, she was no longer breathing.—Nell swallowed—That's when I realized that there was also a certain darkness in me. It wasn't just my father, but it was in my blood, in my body... in my hands. Every time I turned on the television and saw the face of another missing girl, I knew my father had been the culprit. Because I had already seen everything through his eyes. Then he violently squeezed my hands, snuffed out his cigarette on them and said: «If I fall, you will too». In the end he was right. He ended up in jail for his crimes, and I became a childhood trauma with a debilitating fear of myself and what I was capable of doing. And if that darkness is in both, then only one danger is on the loose, and that's me.
Emmett watched her seriously.
—Why do you think you are a danger?
She looked at him, overwhelmed.
—Didn't you hear anything I said?
—I did. But I don't believe anything of all the bad things you named about yourself.—he admitted—That you have a darkness in you and that, somehow, you look like your father.
—But it's like that.
—No, it's not.—Emmett asserted and licked his lips—Do you know what I think of you?
She sighed.
—No. But I'm sure you're going to tell me—she commented with an ironic touch.
—I think you're a good person. A good person who has had bad things happen to them. And believe me that I know what darkness is; I have been in it and I have also known people possessed by it, people like your father. However, I see you... and I don't see anything dark in you, Nell. I only see someone who carries a very heavy baggage and who doesn't let anyone help her to lighten that load.
She was so attentive to his words, that she didn't realize the moment when her eyes betrayed her and released a tear; a single tear that fell down her right cheek. However, she removed it as quickly as it had arrived, and turned her head somewhat ashamed.
—I think we deviated from the initial conversation. This should be about you, not about me.—she said, clearing her throat.
—It can be about both—Emmett suggested. She sent him a gaze so seductively pleading that, somehow, he resigned himself—Okay.—He smiled petulantly—What are you curious about now?
She wrinkled her brow.
—How do you know I'm curious?
—Because you're easy to read, I already told you.
She was thinking. There was something she didn't fully understand.
—You say that, but you seemed surprised when you found out that I was observant.
—One thing is your personality, and another very different thing is what your eyes transmit. You discover personality over time, instead, the look speaks in an instant.
She fixed her gaze on him, trying to maintain it without flinching.
—What do my eyes tell you now?
Emmett looked at her, then looked at her lips, and looked at her again.
—That you want to know more things about vampires—he said. It was not a lie. But, this time, it was he who ended up disturbed.
—Is it a gift of yours or something? To read people through their eyes?
He seemed to consider something before shaking his head.
—No. It only happens to me with you.
—Great—she blurted out sarcastically. She kept watching the lake until a curious fact came to mind—Tell me. What is your age?
—Twenty—he replied immediately.
—And how long have you been twenty years old?—She sought his gaze and he returned it.
—Enough.
—And numerologically speaking, that is...—she insisted for him to continue. Emmett shook his head with a smile.
—Since June 20, 1935.
—Wow.—Nell hoped her face didn't show too much surprise—Don't laugh, but how can you go out during the day?
In any case, he laughed.
—A myth.
—The sun doesn't burn you?
—A myth.
—And the coffins?—From his face, she deduced what he was about to say, so she went ahead—A myth, I understood.
Suddenly, Emmett stood up and held out his hand. She watched him confused.
—What? Are you going to take me home?
—Later—he assured—. Before I want to show you something.
—Are you going to turn into a bat?—she asked suspiciously.
Emmett burst out laughing louder than she had ever heard him.
—As if I hadn't heard that before!—When he had calmed down, he continued—I want to show you what happens when we expose ourselves to the sun.
Nell waited to see if he was kidding, but apparently he was serious. He gave her a smile when he read her hesitation and held out his hand again. She looked at it and then looked back into his eyes. The curiosity of feeling him without gloves arose with much more force than the agonizing fear towards what she could see. So gently, she slid her hand over his and then clung tightly to stand up.
A vibration ran through her skin. In front of her eyes, an image of a brown bear appeared, which then darkened and changed. She saw a series of flashes: A cabin in the middle of the forest; An Emmett with blue eyes being loving with his brothers; his bad streak with bets that later went unnoticed when drinking a glass of cognac. There was no need to even concentrate. It was all there. His past life and also his current life. His feelings before and his feelings now.
Nell closed her eyes for a moment to stabilize, and when she opened them there he was, that beauty that stunned her mind.
—What did you see?—he wanted to know—Was it so disturbing as to take your breath away?
He had a pleading expression.
—No. Actually, it was more the surprise than anything else— she contemplated him with delight—Brown bears? Seriously?
He smiled sideways, relieved, causing his dimples to be marked more than normal.
—What? It's fun to fight against them.
Suddenly, Emmett tugged her gently and guided her to a strategic point. Nell didn't know where he was taking her, but she was so focused on the sensation of his icy skin with her warm skin, that she felt dizzy.
—Where are we going?—she questioned, trying to focus on something else.
—To a place where the dawn can be seen better.
She looked around, surprised to see that he was right: the sky was clear, wide and empty. It was not gray, but light blue, and the sun seemed to be about to appear at any moment.
—Stay here—he ordered, and let go of her hand to move a little further away.
Finally, the first morning rays appeared. Emmett let the light bathe him completely and, only after, focused his gaze on her.