The words they said, the looks they have, the actions they take against me all break me, despite how much I want to reject it, despite how much I wish that their words matter not to me, I couldn't ignore it, my heart couldn't handle it all. The only resolve I could show in the face of their hatred was my will not to leave the school, enough will to just hide in a corner at the side of the building, yet even that place wasn't peaceful for me.
As I shove my head deeper in between my knees to make my insignificant self even smaller, I hear, "Found you!"
Raising my head, I see poking through the bushes I hide behind Intrare's face. She sticks out her tongue while moving her eyes around in a silly fashion to elicit some reaction out of me, but I just dunk my head further into my legs.
Moving through the bushes, she grabs me and starts to shake me as she says, "Hey, hey, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste, Dragoste!"
Feeling annoyed, I form a slab of bones and use it to push her away; nevertheless, she returns, sitting beside me, humming to herself, before saying, "I heard you're a racist."
My head violently moves up, and I say, "I am not a racist!" A cheeky smile soon appears on her face, and I sigh, having fallen for her trap.
"You say that, but apparently you called your fellow classmates vile, disgusting, dishonourable demons."
"I only called them demons, not the rest."
"That's not what they said."
"Because they're a bunch of liars!"
"Well, a lie that everyone in the class seems to confirm as true will unfortunately be taken as the truth."
"That's, that's, that's so unfair. The only reason I said it is because they were making me mad, and I knew it would hurt them as deeply as they hurt me. I didn't say it to them because they were Nightmares."
"If you hate someone, you'll use whatever you can use to make them suffer, but not everyone accepts that. If people here anathematised people like us saying that in any serious fashion, we instantly become humans to them, and they were baiting you knowing that. You're very book smart, brother, but your social awareness is all but zero."
"They are always messing with my stuff, and even damaged the bracelet Grandma gave me."
"Then just fight back and give up a 1 and a 2, or you could use the Frumos family position to help yourself."
"And watch as the school gets accused of human favouritism? Lots of really good teacher work here, and devote their livelihoods to this school, I can't allow them to get harassed over me."
"If people will harass you over standing up for yourself, they deserve to get hit as well."
"You can't just hit everyone in the world! That's not how adults get to live in society."
"It always works for me."
Turning to her, I say, "What are you talking abou-." My eyes fall on her fists, which are filled with dry blood. I quickly grab one and say, "What the hell is this?" As I squeeze.
Breaking free of my grip, she says, "Justice obviously."
"Did you actually start a fight with them, you moron!"
"Hey, I was just standing up for you!"
"I CAN DEFEND MYSELF!"
My scream makes her pull back for a moment, before she says, "THEN WHY ARE YOU HERE CRYING!"
"THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, AND SO IS EVERYTHING ELSE THAT GOES ON IN MY LIFE. IF YOU THINK BEING BORN TWO YEARS AFTER ME MAKES IT SO THAT YOU CAN JUST BUTT YOUR WAY INTO MY LIFE, YOU'D BE DEAD WRONG. AS FAR AS I AM CONCERNED YOUR JUST A LOUD, ANNOYING PEST I HAVE TO LIVE WITH, SO REMEMBER THAT BEFORE YOU PUSH YOUR GIANT HEAD INTO MY LIFE YOU BRAT!"
Intrare lower her head at the end of my verbal lashing, and breathing in and out heavily, I look at the trembling of her tiny hands. I feel the reality of my words dawn on me, and try to speak, but in that instant, she raises her head, swings it back, then smashes her forehead into mine, knocking me onto the ground.
With her forehead against my own, she says with tears in her eyes, "YOU NEVER HANG OUT WITH ME ANYMORE, YOU NEVER COMPLIMENT ME ANYMORE, YOU NEVER EVEN READ ME BEDTIME STORIES ANYMORE, YET YOU STILL SCREAM AT ME! YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK, YOU SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
She quickly pulls her head off of mine and runs away. I stare up at the purple light that flows down from the sky and cover my eyes, saying, "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid. STUPID!"
She doesn't deserve this, she doesn't deserve to be the source of it, she just wants to spend time with me, she just wants to hang out with her elder brother, but every time I saw her, every time I think of her, I can't help but feel something horrible inside of me, I can't help but have a wish inside me I never should have, and more than anything else it's what makes me feel like I should die.
Yet my cowardice stops me from doing so, leaving me with nothing but hatred so destructive that I could kill everyone I have ever known. So I sealed my seal away from the eyes of others.
Location: Nightmare Nation, Blestemate; Frumos Castle Blesteosteo; Dragoste Room
With her fist knocking against my door, I hear Mother say, "Dragoste, please come out, you need to talk to us, you can't just keep eating in your room."
Sitting rolled underneath my bed with a purple stone that encases flashes, flashing to provide me some level of brightness, I flip through the pages of the book in front of me, trying my best to drown out my mother's pleas as I extend the bones from my body to reinforce the door.
As the knocking stops, she says, "Please just take care of yourself, it hurts not to see you."
The pain that cracked the voice of the woman who had never once cried in front of me damaged me, yet the looks I would give her if we met made me regret even having eyes.
And in the face of that, I became a coward, who avoided her, avoided Father, avoided Intrare, just to give myself an extra few seconds where it all didn't exist to weigh down on my heart and soul.
So I ran from it all, from Intrare.
As Intrare runs down the hallway with her friends in tow, I quickly jump up and use my bones to grab onto the wall of the mansion as she rushes by, waiting until she leaves to drop down.
I ran from my grandparents.
Opening my door and placing a tray full of food on my desk, Sorano says, "Young master, your Grandma asked when you're going to visit next? She missed you when you're Father when to see her."
Grabbing the tattered bracelet in my pocket, I say, "I don't know, I can't face her right now. Please tell her I am feeling sick."
Sorano nods and takes her leave. As my door shuts, I bury my head into my blanket in front of myself, and say, "Fool."
Even from my Classmates.
Staring deeply into the textbook placed in front of me, I use the pops across my hair to slowly deflect all the knick-knacks people throw at me as I try to read, yet in front of me, the teacher says, "Dragoste, I can hear the rustling of your hair. Stop using your curse."
Raising my head, I say, "Y-Yes, sorry."
Giggles arise across the classroom, and the teacher hits the board in annoyance but allows them to continue as he speaks.
"Due to the natural inclination of some of our curses, we tend to have stranger impulses than normal humans."
The laughter that arises from their mouths makes my mind go crazy.
"If you have a curse that activates when you eat, you'll constantly feel a stronger sensation to be things in your mouth, and wield your curse."
The things my classmates throw at me, stick to and prick my skin.
"Your brain doesn't like the sensation of having these intrinsic powers, and not being able to wield them, while for people with harmless curses this isn't an issue, but those of you with combat-ready curses must practise healthy levels of restraint."
The looks they all give to me in the brief moment, I raise my head scare me down to my soul.
"Use your curses for community/non-combat focused activities, by doing so you'll reconfigure the way your brains perceive the use of your abilities, adding positive feelings to using your curses in non violent scenar-."
And as a bell rings across the entire school, I grab whatever I have and dash out of the room, as the teacher says, "Wait, I haven't given you the hom-."
Ignoring him, I keep moving, and from my class I soon hear laughter roar out. What did they say about me? Why are they laughing? What is so funny about what they do to me? Why do I have to experience this?
These thoughts burst throughout my heart, pushing me forward faster than I could ever hope, just so I can have a moment for myself in this world that rejects such pleasures from me.
I ran, and I ran, and I ran from all the troubles that weighed down on my heart each day, yet each time I did, I felt less comfortable where I once was, the places that I once called home all became more and more uncomfortable to me until I couldn't even bear to sit in the city anymore.
Location: A few meters South of Căderea-Dracului
Eventually, the only place I could feel at peace was a hill far south of Căderea-Dracului. I brought whatever book I could fit from my house's library into my bag, and sat there reading every day to spare myself from the harassment and embarrassment that waited for me back in the city, yet it never stopped the pain.
Looking forward from the hill, I stare down at the beauty of the city that lies in front of me, the very heart of my people's country, a place I was born and raised in, a place that encapsulates all I love about myself, and in the face of it, I can't do anything but cry.
Grabbing my chest, I shout, "WHY? WHY DO I HAVE TO STAND HERE? WHY CAN'T I BE WITH EVERYONE ELSE? WHY CAN'T I FEEL HAPPY LIKE EVERYONE ELSE? I WAS BORN HERE! SO WHY AM I DENIED THE HAPPINESS YOU ALL HAVE? I JUST WANT TO, I JUST WANT TO-."
My cries that day roared out so harshly that I started to spit up blood. I couldn't love myself anymore; I could barely even find the strength to lift my body off the ground. On that day, my life was all but over, yet if God exists, he was there for me that day, Orb.
Feeling a slimy hand at the side of my cheek, I turn my face where I see a little slime with a bow on it holding an ice scream. I stare in confusion, as I say, "A Wonderbeas-."
It constantly waves its little stump of an arm around, waving the ice cream, before shoving it in my mouth, and as the taste surges through my body, all I can bring myself to say is, "Delicious."
The slime smiles at my declaration and then throws the rest of the ice cream in my mouth, forcing it down my throat until it is all gone. Staring at it afterwards with the sensation of the sweetness bringing a forced smile to my face, I say, "Did you do that for me?"
It nods, and then from its body it manifests the words, "See you tomorrow," on its body before sliding off.
Its small body moves happily down the hill, and seeing it one thing dominates every aspect of my body, and soon bursts out as I say, "How cute."