Run..... That's all what I wanted since that cursed day. It is a horrible torture for me every time I remember that event or that place. I think I feel better now and I am able to live again.
It has not been easy for me to overcome and forget about what happened to me. It was a real trauma and truth be told, I have been scarred for life and I still can't come over this. I finally relocated in Yaounde the capital where many think it's the best place to be. I got a job in a primary school as a teacher. I can finally free myself. I have always loved being with children because it gives me joy and I find peace in their innocence and genuineness. I had the chance of having a work place not too far from home because the worst expenditure in this town is transport and it is a blessing to find not only a good job but a good house not far from my work place.
I left that cursed place with my mother. The place is actually my hometown but just the act of calling it's name or remembering the place makes me feel sick, scared and insecure so I live as if that place doesn't exist anymore. Let's forget about my past and let's enjoy the present.
The school which employed me is a good one and the pay is good because i have a salary 150,000 FRS which is enough for me and by grace, I have been able to find a flat with two bedrooms, a palour, kitchen and bathroom with water facility at 60,000frs which is a great deal. I now have an environment in which I can relax and do my things smoothly.
I don't like outings so i'm always at home and I just go out to do the essentials if not, I stay home and do some cleaning, washing , cooking and baking. My hobbies are singing, reading, drawing, watching tv and writing. They help me evade into imaginary worlds where all my pains and troubles are gone and forgotten.
My mother is a great person. she has been with me all the time and she has been my pillar sharing my pains like no other. she helps me rise again when I'm in my darkest hours and she gives me hopes and shows me that i'm not worthless. 9 years is the time I took to kinda get over the trauma but who am I kidding? those nightmares still hunt me down till today and truth be told, I'll never be the same again. I am 24 now but there are scars left, the past still hunts me, it has become part of me and I learned how to do with it.
I don't have friends and I dread the presence of the opposite sex near me, it makes me want to loose it and since I can't avoid this at a 100% , I stay home as much as possible and I don't stay that long outside.
i hate wearing clothes that expose my body and make me look attractive especially to the opposite sex. I dread being ogled and admired be it in admiration or with lust which I hate most. so I avoid putting on makeup,sexy and tight dresses . I don't paint my nails nor put on any artificial thing on my body. I don't follow fashion trends and I dress simple with the main aim of chasing men away and bring disinterest to me. I hate being the center of attraction and my aim is to keep being so.
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Dear readers I'm so sorry for the absence but for now on, you will more to read. Hope you enjoy this novel to the fullest and do not hesitate leaving comments thanks.