My mother… whose real name I still don't even know.
My mother, who played a major role in what I've become today…
My mother, who raised me with hidden desires…
All this time…
She had suspected me since the very first months of my life in this world—a baby who didn't act like one, a child unlike any other…
She truly doubted that I was her son, believing instead that I was the soul of another who had taken her child's body…
But she refused to believe it. She didn't accept it, forcing lies and excuses onto herself just to forget what she knew about me.
And the first time I died in this world… I realized it.
The truth that she had killed me the moment she confirmed I wasn't a Dryad…
And her suicide right after… when she realized she had killed the dearest thing she had with her own hands.
"I… I knew. I knew from the start, but…"
That only meant she couldn't accept the presence of a foreign soul in place of her innocent child…
"But even so, I believed… that no matter who you were, you'd still be the son I brought into this world."
Even after accepting her fate, broken by guilt as she saw the lifeless body of her soulless child…
She came to understand, in the end, that her destiny with me had already been decided from the beginning.
"I kept brushing it aside, telling myself you were just special—different from the other children of the tribe. Over time, I accepted your presence, especially after you proved your talent as a member of the tribe, as a High Dryad. That made me truly happy…
Watching you grow before my eyes made me forget everything about your strange childhood. And that's when I thought… maybe my dream could finally come true. Especially since you weren't the child I thought I couldn't give birth to…"
Yes… she found in me the perfect vessel to fulfill her desires.
She wanted to make me… her partner.
"I've always wondered… What was your goal in making me your partner all this time??"
The smile on her face vanished, replaced by an expression of deep sorrow.
That woman—whose smile never faded—had only shown sadness twice before…
Once when she killed me after confirming I wasn't one of the Dryads…
And the second, just a short while ago, when she heard the painful truth from her teacher.
I wondered…
What could've made her this way? What disturbed her mind enough for her to pour all her being into this madness?
But what I was about to hear now… was a story.
A story of a mother and her daughter—a filthy, tragic tale that no one would ever imagine happening in our world.
...…
"I understand now… I never explained anything from the beginning… What a guilty mother I've become—just like her."
Like her?
If I remember correctly… in those memories, she said she wanted to fulfill her mother's dream?
"In my childhood, I lived happily with my parents in the tribe. We were a lively family, creating beautiful memories together…
My father was very handsome, being the only male High Dryad in the entire tribe. He was also the kindest man I had ever known.
He took care of me and my mother, taught me so many things, and did everything in his power to ensure we lived happily, protected from the outside world that feared us as outsiders.
But… when I was eight, he died of old age. Because he was a High Dryad—and because he was partnered with another High Dryad like my mother—he didn't live past a hundred. I still remember his elderly face even though I was just a little girl. And since my parents could never have children throughout their marriage, they had lost hope… until I was finally born at the very end of his life."
After my father's death, my mother sank into a deep depression and withdrew completely from ruling the tribe. That's when my teacher took over leadership, waiting until I came of age to inherit the position.
So that's why there are two High Dryads in the same era…
"During that time, I would often visit my mother to comfort her and feel her warmth… but all I received in return was hatred."
After a long silence, my mother continued with tearful words, her voice trembling as she recalled how the only words she ever heard from her mother were things like: 'I wish you'd died instead of your father' or 'If only you were born a boy, you would've made me happier after he was gone'.
It was then that my mother realized her mother wasn't heartbroken over the loss of her husband out of love…
She had merely used her husband's boring life to entertain herself.
She didn't even want to have a child with him—afraid it would be a girl.
Because a girl couldn't fulfill her twisted desires.
…What the hell is this?
Is this even a family?!
A being as sovereign and noble as a High Dryad—yet she harbored such disgusting lusts instead of living a normal life with her husband and daughter???
"When I understood the darkness inside my mother, I never saw her again…
Until I heard she was bedridden…"
Even after all she'd done, my mother still rushed to her side upon hearing she was ill.
And in her final breaths, these were her last words:
"If you had been born a boy… could you have been my partner?"
…Huh?
"What? That was really her final sentence?!"
"Yes. Even at the very end, she hated my existence and cared only for her carnal desires."
What a grandmother I had…
Should I be glad she's dead?
Or should I mourn the fact that my mother suffered the same way I did?
The pain of losing your parents before you could even understand what happened…
Or being hated simply because you were born different…
Looking back, I see that every life I've lived—every world—was painful and tragic, one after the other.
Is it because we were born different?
Or does the world itself reject those like us?
"After that, I left on a journey to explore the world—the same journey every future High Dryad must take. I eventually discovered that my mother was infamous among humans…
Rumors called her a 'Demoness of Lust,' seducing men and leading them to their deaths when they couldn't handle the raging energy of a High Dryad."
…Unbelievable.
But it made me wonder again…
Was that truly my grandmother's personality from the beginning?
Or did she become that way after her so-called pre-coronation journey?
"So… that's when you met my father, right?"
"Huh? How did you know??"
As I expected—she wouldn't have chosen some random stranger to raise a child with her out of nowhere.
She would've chosen someone she knew well, someone she clearly met during her pre-coronation journey… since High Dryads aren't allowed to leave the tribe otherwise.
"Yes, you're right. Ari was a member of the party I formed during my journey. There were four of us: me, Ari, his lover Anya, and our talented swordsman."
"…Wait. My father had a lover?!"
"No. At that time, they weren't married yet. Ari and Anya had been childhood friends… but they married after we returned to the tribe."
So he was married…
Then where is Lady Anya now?
Could it be… she killed her to force my father to follow her?
"Ugh… that look on your face says it all.
After we returned to the tribe and years passed, my mother's final words stayed with me. That's when I decided to prove her wrong—that her dream would never come true no matter how hard she tried.
Becoming a sinful mother and taking my son as a partner… it was impossible."
Wait…
"I prepared myself to become a sinful mother like her… and accepted the consequences of my decision."
That means…
"I used the Sacred Blessing at that time to make you be born as a partner, not a son, and then raised you as a son.
Because if I had given birth to you after getting a partner, I couldn't prove my mother wrong—since we are only allowed one partner in our entire lifetime.
And to prevent you from suffering the curse of aging despite being a High Dryad, I sacrificed my profession so that yours would be 'Mage' instead of 'High Dryad'—that way, you'd live longer."
Just like in those memories…
But my head is spinning now…
A partner isn't related by blood, which is why they can marry and have children without worrying about genetic mixing…
But as I understood, High Dryads can never give birth to a son—only daughters. That's why the blessing existed in the first place.
So wasn't it clear from the start that my grandmother could never give birth to a son?
…Or were her lusts really stronger than her logic?
Sigh…
"But there was still a problem. For you to grow up the way I did, a father figure was necessary. But I couldn't take a partner… so my only options were the members of my party—those I already knew well.
The swordsman had disappeared on a journey to pursue the path of the sword…
And Ari had already gotten married."
"So… did you really do it?"
"No! Of course not! After all, Anya was my dear friend—I would never kill or harm her over something like that! Especially after I found out… she was pregnant!"
…HUHHHH?!
She was pregnant?!
That means my father had a child after I was born?!