"Putting that aside for now, there's actually something I came here to confirm with you."
Shunsui looked at Batsu'unsai with a grave expression, completely failing to notice the bewildered look on her face.
He drew a slow breath before voicing his theory.
"Captain Kazuma is seriously injured, and rumors are spreading throughout the Seireitei that he'll soon succeed the Captain-Commander."
Shunsui's eyes sharpened.
"I assume those rumors were deliberately spread to reassure everyone and prevent panic?"
Batsu'unsai's brain nearly shut down.
For several seconds, she couldn't even speak.
Then she finally managed to stammer,
"W-What the hell are you talking about?"
Her thoughts had become a complete mess.
Where had any of this come from?
When had Kazuma suddenly become seriously injured?
And why was the entire Seireitei apparently talking about him becoming Captain-Commander?
What the hell had happened while she'd been shut inside this room?
"Captain Batsu'unsai?"
Seeing that she'd apparently stopped functioning, Shunsui waved a hand in front of her face.
"Are you all right?"
At that moment, Kazuma — who'd been lying quietly on the bed — heard the conversation as well.
His entire body suddenly jerked.
"Mmmph! MMMMMMPH!"
He began making frantic muffled noises beneath the bandages.
Then he started twisting violently across the mattress like a worm.
Thud!
Kazuma rolled straight off the bed and crashed onto the floor.
A powerful burst of energy erupted from his body.
The layers of bandages wrapped around him were blasted apart instantly, torn into scraps that scattered throughout the room.
Kazuma sprang upright.
His face was bright red.
Veins bulged across his forehead and neck as he roared,
"BULLSHIT!"
"WHO THE FUCK IS SPREADING THAT KIND OF STUPID RUMOR?!"
Anyone wondering why Kazuma had finally abandoned his strategy of playing dead only needed to consider one thing.
If he kept pretending much longer, this situation might spiral completely out of control.
At this rate, within a few days, people might stop saying he was going to become Captain-Commander and start claiming he already was Captain-Commander.
Just imagining it sent a chill down his spine.
"C-Captain Kazuma?"
Shunsui's brain stopped working this time.
"You're… fine?"
According to his carefully constructed theory, Kazuma was supposed to be gravely wounded and barely clinging to life.
Yet the man currently standing in front of him looked perfectly healthy.
More than healthy, really.
He looked energetic enough to start murdering people.
What the hell was going on?
"Fine?"
Kazuma became even angrier.
"Fine my ass!"
He pointed directly at Shunsui.
"Tell me right now who the hell started spreading this garbage! I'm going to personally chop that bastard into pieces!"
Kazuma was completely red-faced with fury.
Becoming Captain-Commander was absolutely impossible.
As far as he was concerned, taking that job sounded thousands of times worse than simply dying.
Then Batsu'unsai burst out laughing.
"Hahahahahaha!"
She doubled over, clutching her stomach.
Tears gathered at the corners of her eyes.
For days, she'd exhausted every possible argument trying to convince her husband to accept the position.
Nothing had worked.
And just when she'd begun worrying that the deal might truly fall apart, this rumor had appeared out of nowhere.
It was practically a gift from heaven.
Someone had delivered a pillow just as she was getting sleepy.
"Wait."
Shunsui stared at Kazuma intently.
"The rumor is already all over the Seireitei."
"You seriously knew nothing about it?"
He carefully watched Kazuma's face, trying to determine whether the man was pretending ignorance or had genuinely been kept in the dark.
Kazuma's expression immediately turned ugly.
"Oh, I know."
He gritted his teeth.
"I know exactly what's going on."
There was no mystery here.
Old Man Yama was obviously behind it.
Otherwise, how could such a ridiculous rumor have spread throughout the entire Seireitei so quickly?
The more Kazuma thought about it, the angrier he became.
That damned old man had really gone too far.
Just to force him into the position, Yamamoto had resorted to something this shameless!
"Hahahahaha!"
Batsu'unsai was still laughing.
"Husband, this is a good thing!"
She wiped a tear from her eye.
"Captain-Commander! Just think about how impressive that sounds!"
She could barely contain herself.
Genryūsai really was something else.
Coming up with a plan like this was exactly what one would expect from a thousand-year-old fox.
"Tetsuzaemon!"
Kazuma suddenly shouted.
"Go get Kōga."
"Immediately."
"Right now!"
If he wanted to crush this ridiculous rumor before it got any worse, then Kōga was the obvious choice.
His obedient student commanded a special forces unit.
They were practically made for this kind of information-control job.
"I'm going!"
Iba responded loudly and shot out of the room as though someone had lit a fire under him.
His retreat was so fast and desperate that it looked as though something terrifying was chasing him.
That left only Shunsui, Kazuma, and Batsu'unsai in the room.
Shunsui's gaze slowly moved between husband and wife.
Back and forth.
Back and forth.
Years of experience gathering intelligence and reading people began putting the pieces together.
A spark of enlightenment flashed through his mind.
'Aha.'
Kazuma had absolutely no desire to become Captain-Commander.
In fact, he was apparently willing to do almost anything to avoid it.
Old Man Yama, on the other hand, clearly wanted to force Kazuma into accepting the position badly enough to mobilize people throughout the Seireitei and spread rumors on purpose.
Then there was Kazuma's supposed injury.
Shunsui could think of only two possibilities.
The first was that Kazuma had deliberately pretended to be injured in an attempt to escape the appointment.
The second — and far more likely — was that Kazuma and Yamamoto had gotten into a furious argument over the position, causing Old Man Yama to lose his temper and beat him senseless.
Yes.
That perfectly matched Old Man Yama's personality.
Not a single flaw.
The motive fit.
The sequence of events fit.
The result fit.
Everything formed a complete, beautiful chain of logic.
Shunsui had solved the case.
This deduction was rock solid.
Background music should have started playing.
There was only one detail that still bothered him.
Batsu'unsai.
When she heard about the rumor, her reaction had been the complete opposite of Kazuma's.
She had laughed so hard that tears came out.
Normally, as Kazuma's wife, shouldn't she be standing firmly on her husband's side?
Yet she looked downright delighted by the idea of him becoming Captain-Commander.
Shunsui narrowed his eyes thoughtfully.
Could there be another secret hidden beneath all of this?