A new day has arrived in this new (or not-so-new) world. I wonder what it has in store for me today?
After yesterday's "introduction," it's hard to expect anything good. I woke up with a hangover, got grounded for a month, lost my trip to Europe, almost "split at the seams" (unlike my shorts), and then got chewed out again when the parents found out about the mass poisoning.
At least they didn't find out about my "injury." Or would it have been better if they did? Maybe then they wouldn't have been so hard on me.
Nah, it wasn't that serious. The poisoning turned out to be just a massive hangover—talk about making a mountain out of a molehill—and the injury was just overdoing the stretching.
I somehow managed to hide my "strange walk" from everyone. A miracle? Maybe. Hopefully, they didn't see the training either.
The sound of a message interrupted my thoughts. Who's awake this early on a weekend? I checked the clock—9:22 AM. Okay, not that early.
I felt surprisingly refreshed. I'd passed out around 10:00 PM last night, meaning I'd slept for eleven hours. Not bad.
I opened the chat. It was CJ, asking if I was asleep. Where should I send you with questions like that? I decided to be nice since he was grounded too. I asked for the latest news and rumors. Yesterday, I'd wasted the whole day watching YouTube videos... ugh.
The news was... interesting. Many people, including Karl and me, were grounded for a month, losing their pocket money, computers, and consoles.
Some were less lucky and got punished until the end of summer. A few of the guys who brought the booze actually ended up at the police station.
Apparently, I'm now a school "celebrity"—the "Litrball Champion." No one could out-drink me. So that's why my head hurt so much.
Everyone's bringing up my Russian roots and a bunch of alcohol stereotypes. Great. I've become living proof of a cliché.
I asked about rumors of "Superman," as the journalists dubbed him. Nothing new. Interest in Batman is also spiking, but no concrete info.
However, stories from CJ's grandfather about a "forgotten" team of heroes who fought Nazis in WWII (JSA?) were more intriguing. CJ promised to dig deeper with his old man.
After some more complaining about the unfairness of our punishments, I checked my Status. My XP had increased.
Level: 7
Experience: 2827/3500
Where did the extra 125 XP come from? No quest notifications, I didn't kill anyone (does that even give XP?), and no achievements.
All I did was that short training session where I leveled up a few skills.
Do I get XP for leveling skills? Like in a Bethesda game? "It just works," right Todd Howard?
So the System motivates me to grind skills to raise levels, to get currency, to spend on the Gacha?
This is definitely the work of "effective managers." A system with holes for abuse (grinding many small skills) that eventually hits a wall of hard level-scaling where the only option left is to pay.
It's brilliant in its stupidity. I wonder if Bethesda collaborated with EA or Ubisoft on this one?
If it were a pure EA creation, there wouldn't be crystals for leveling up, and prices would be way higher. So, it's probably Ubisoft.
At least I have my goal for the month: ruthless, merciless grinding. I'll start after breakfast.
Food's done. Time to train... Wait, SHIT! Why did I go outside?!
I could have stayed in the home gym! No one would have seen that disgrace. Now? "Drunken Master." That's my official title now, thanks to my sisters' mocking.
I wish I could erase their memories with a Men in Black neutralizer... or magic.
Since I have half an hour to kill while my food digests, why not pull the Gacha? Maybe a few cool cards will cheer me up. Let's stick with the DC banner.
Desert Eagle .357 Magnum (Gold-plated) - A big, shiny gun. Not the .50 cal, but still cool.
Bottle of Milk (Azur Lane - Kashino) - Wait, why is this an Azur Lane item?
Asuma Toki (Blue Archive) - A blonde maid with a rifle and halos. Cute.
Barbara Ann Minerva / Cheetah (Bombshells DC) - She looks like a normal woman in a safari outfit. Weird.
Pencil Set - Trash.
Ryu (Street Fighter) - The OG legend. The beard looks good on him.
Watermelon - Hope it's a 50-crystal watermelon.
Poison Ivy (Bombshells DC) - Green sweater, long skirt. Very retro.
Enhancement Card - Always welcome.
Deathwing/Neltharion (WarCraft) - Holy shit. A world-breaking dragon. I'll put him in the "Deus pile" for now.
Looking closer at Toki, she's definitely my type. Too bad the maid outfit is just fanservice; she's a bodyguard with a high-tech combat suit.
Explaining a teenage maid to my parents would be impossible anyway.
The "Bombshells" girls are from an alternate WWII era where they're heroes, not villains. "We know little of the multiverse," indeed.
Ryu and Deathwing are canon versions. I just realized something: what do Ivy and Cheetah give me?
Chun-Li and Ryu are fighters, they boost my combat skills. But them? Biology and hunting?
And what about Deus or Deathwing? They're strong, but did they have "skills"? Or did they just win by raw power? That's a terrifying thought.
I'll pull one more time. Come on, give me a "Jack of all trades" or that Neutralizer.
Ice Make Magic (Fairy Tail) - Gray Fullbuster's magic! Nice! I know what I'm grinding now.
Narya, the Ring of Fire (Lord of the Rings) - One of the Three Elven Rings. Massive pull.
Pineapple Juice - Ugh.
Arash (Fate) - The legendary Archer. Does he summon as a Servant or a human?
Enhancement Card - Good.
Roon's Bra (Used - Azur Lane) - Gacha, why are you like this?
Four-leaf Clover - +1 to Luck.
Clark Kent / Superman (Secret Identity) - DC - YES! SUPERMAN! 9. Dragon Scale - Incredibly durable.
QTE-Existence (24 hours) - A game mechanic card?
Okay, the Superman card was a letdown. It's an alternate reality Clark Kent who is a psychic human, not a Kryptonian. He just mimics the powers of the "comic book" Superman from his world.
Still, it's my top-tier card for now.
Arash is tricky. Summoning a Servant without a Holy Grail is a mana-drain nightmare.
QTE-Existence will force me into quick-time events for 24 hours to get better results. Sounds risky.
Narya protects from decay and boosts natural abilities, but might be useless outside Middle-earth.
Time to start my "Ice Man" path. I activated Ice Make Magic. A wave of coolness washed over me.
I tried it: fist to palm, visualize. I managed to create a foot-long icicle. It fell and shattered immediately.
My fingers were freezing. Ur really knew what she was doing when she made Gray train in the snow. This is going to be a long road.
I swapped Chun-Li for Zid Taubane (4-Cut Hero) in the Unity slot to boost my magic stats.
Name: Trueno Miguel Alexander
Title: Drunken Master
Magic: 20 (+5)
Ice Make Magic: Level 1
Trolling: 8 (+17)
Zid boosted my magic and alchemy significantly. He even gave me a level 25 in Trolling. Figures.
I tried the icicle again. Faster this time, and I caught it.
[ Skill: Ice Make Magic increased. ]
I tried using an Enhancement card on the skill itself.
Bad idea. My body went numb, my head spun, and I saw rainbow spots.
It felt like being hit with a sledgehammer. No more shortcuts.
I'll stick to the old-fashioned way. Now I just need to figure out how to stop the melting ice from leaving puddles all over my room.