WebNovels

Magic? More like Screw It

AmeiraThyone
7
chs / week
The average realized release rate over the past 30 days is 7 chs / week.
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Synopsis
Elara Voss—Ellie—has never felt a single emotion in her life. No fear, no joy, no heartbreak. Just data points, observations, and a quiet, clinical curiosity about why everyone else seems so... noisy. At nineteen, she's a barista who counts pours like heartbeats she doesn't have, until one ordinary shift when blue floating text invades her vision: a System. It promises strength, levels, quests. It demands she survive. Then it yanks her through reality into Ordelia—a medieval fantasy world of ancient forests, warring kingdoms, and magic that actually works. She lands barefoot in the forbidden Whispering Woods, milk pitcher still in hand, facing wolves and worse. The System's objective is brutally simple: Become strong enough. Or die trying. Ellie doesn't panic. She doesn't rage. She adapts. With deadpan logic and zero filter, she bluffs her way into a mercenary caravan, masters forbidden spells under rival teachers, and levels up through blood, fire, and accidental arson. She meets Kael Thornwood, a silver-tongued merchant who smuggles spell-books and flirts like it's currency. For the first time, her pulse spikes without explanation. She logs it as "anomaly" and keeps moving. But power attracts shadows. Another System user—Vesper Kane—watches from the wings, manipulating nobles and minds like chess pieces. As civil war ignites and alliances fracture, Ellie rises from glitch to force of nature, leading strikes that shatter armies. In the quiet before the end, Kael confesses what she still can't name. She almost understands. Victory comes at a price. The System declares its goal complete and forces her home. She steps through the portal, leaving Kael's pleas, her found family, and a world that finally felt... something. Back in her original life, decades crawl by in gray routine. She ages. She fades. And on her deathbed, the System whispers one last gift: a second chance. She awakens in the Whispering Woods—same day, same wolves, same indifferent sky. This time she knows every trap, every betrayal, every almost-kiss. She speedruns destiny: saves her friends faster, exposes Vesper on day one, breaks the rival System for good. And when the dust settles, she finally feels it—the warmth, the ache, the stupid, glorious mess of caring.
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Chapter 1 - I

Chapter 1: Coffee, Clock, and Code

The espresso machine hissed like it personally resented existence.

Elara Voss—Ellie to the three people who bothered remembering her name—did not care. She never had. Resentment required emotional investment, and her emotional portfolio had been bankrupt since approximately age twelve. Possibly earlier. The paperwork was inconclusive. 

She tamped the grounds with mechanical precision, the same thirty-two-pound pressure she'd applied six thousand four hundred and twelve times before (she kept count because numbers were reliable; people were not). The portafilter clicked home. She flipped the lever. Black liquid began its slow, resentful drip into the demitasse below.

A college kid in a beanie leaned over the counter, phone already recording. "Yo, can you make it with the heart art? For the 'gram?"

Ellie regarded him the way one regards a mildly interesting fungus. "No."

"Aw, come on—"

"The machine is analog. The milk is oat. The heart would require me to feel whimsy." She wiped the steam wand. "I do not."

The kid blinked, unsure whether he'd been insulted or philosophized at. He settled on both and slunk away to post a subtitled video titled Savage Barista Owns Me.

Ellie did not smile. Smiling was an expenditure of facial muscles for social lubricant purposes, and the lubricant in this café had long since dried to a crust. She moved to the next ticket. Large iced Americano, extra shot, room for cream. Routine. Predictable. Safe.

Then the world stuttered.

Not dramatically. Not with thunder or swirling vortexes or conveniently timed truck-kun. Just a single skipped frame, the way a bad stream buffers for half a second before resuming. Except when reality resumed, there was new information in her field of view.

Blue.

Translucent.

Floating six inches in front of her retinas like augmented-reality contacts nobody had ordered.

[System Initialization Complete]

[Welcome, Player Elara Voss]

[Objective: Become strong enough]

[Current Status]

Level: 1

Class: Unassigned

HP: 120/120

MP: 80/80

STR: 8

AGI: 9

VIT: 10

INT: 14

WIS: 7

LUK: 3

Ellie stared at the text. The text stared back, polite and immutable.

She tilted her head 4.7 degrees left. The blue rectangle followed perfectly, parallax-locked to her pupils.

She tilted right. Same result.

"Hm," she said aloud.

The word contained zero inflection. It was an observation, not an exclamation.

A second window unfolded beneath the first, smaller, ticker-tape style.

[Tutorial Message: The interface will remain visible until dismissed or until death. Death is not recommended at Level 1.]

[Would you like to view controls? Y/N]

Ellie considered the question for exactly 1.8 seconds.

She raised her right index finger and poked the floating Y.

Nothing happened.

She poked harder.

Still nothing.

She tried her left hand. Same.

Finally, she muttered, "Yes."

The word appeared to suffice. The tutorial bloomed wider.

[Basic Controls]

Thought: opens menu

Verbal command: activates loud functions

Physical contact: selects (if calibrated)

Blinking pattern (3 rapid): emergency logout (permanently disables interface; not advised)

Ellie absorbed the list the way she absorbed health-code violations: clinically, without surprise.

She thought: Menu.

A translucent dashboard materialized, edges shimmering like cheap CGI. Inventory (empty). Skills (none). Quests (one pending). Achievements (zero). Shop (locked).

The pending quest blinked as if urging her to read.

[Main Quest: Survive]

Description: Stay alive until the System deems you adequately prepared for transfer.

Reward: Access to Tutorial Zone Ω-7

Failure: Cessation of biological functions

Time Limit: None (recommended completion within 72 hours)

Ellie read it twice.

"Survive," she echoed, volume flat. "Seems oddly specific."

A new line appended itself beneath the quest box.

[Additional Note: Emotional simulation module offline. Compensation: Pain dampener set to 40%. Enjoy your stay.]

She flexed her left hand, then pressed her thumbnail into the meat of her palm. A dim red crescent appeared. No spike of hurt. Just pressure data.

"Generous," she noted.

The afternoon rush had started. Orders stacked up on the thermal printer like accusations. A woman in yoga pants was already tapping her card impatiently. Ellie turned back to the espresso machine, muscle memory taking over while her forebrain continued running diagnostics on the new HUD.

She pulled two shots. Steamed milk. Poured latte art without meaning to—a lopsided fern leaf. Muscle memory again. She slid the cup across the counter without looking at the customer.

"Thanks, uh… you okay?" the woman asked. "You're kinda… staring into space."

Ellie met her eyes. "I am calibrating an unsolicited augmented interface that claims jurisdiction over my continued survival."

The woman laughed nervously, assuming sarcasm. "Right. Cool. Have a good one."

Ellie did not reply. She wiped the counter in slow, even strokes. The blue text hovered patiently, neither impatient nor benevolent. Simply present.

Like humidity. Or taxes. Or the realization—slow, unemotional, inevitable—that her Tuesday afternoon shift was about to become significantly more complicated.

She glanced at the clock. 3:47 p.m.

Forty-three minutes until close.

She wondered, with the same detached curiosity one applies to weather patterns, whether the System would wait that long.

It did not.

At 3:51, mid-pour of a caramel macchiato, the world stuttered again.

Harder this time.

Reality folded like wet paper.

The café, the hiss of steam, the smell of burnt grounds—all of it tore sideways and vanished.

Ellie felt no fear.

Only mild annoyance.

And then—

green.

Endless green.

Whispering leaves.

The scent of wet earth and something faintly predatory.

She landed barefoot on moss, still gripping the stainless-steel milk pitcher.

The blue text reappeared, brighter against the forest gloom.

[Transfer Complete]

[Welcome to Ordelia – Forbidden Zone: Whispering Woods]

[Tutorial Zone Ω-7 loading…]

[First objective updated: Survive the next 60 seconds]

A low growl rolled through the underbrush, forty degrees to her left.

Ellie looked down at the milk pitcher in her hand.

Then up at the shadows moving between ancient trunks.

She sighed—small, precise, almost polite.

"Magic," she said to no one in particular.

"More like screw it."

She raised the pitcher like a club.

And waited for the tutorial to begin.