"That's right."
Hikaru immediately changed the subject.
"But for you girls, they wouldn't count as strangers, right?"
Yumiko-san instantly showed a look of disgust.
"How gross. Can you change the way you talk? I'd rather you shut up than flatter us with words like that."
"Yumiko-san is quite strict with people," Hikaru-kun said helplessly.
"Then I won't offend the eyes of the honorable Queen Yumiko-san. I wish you all a pleasant time. I'll go back to defeating the Dead Fish Eyes Monster who plans to conquer the world with tennis."
Hayato smiled.
"Then I wish you and the Dead Fish Eyes Monster a fun match too."
As Hikaru turned around, he casually gave a thumbs-up behind him with his left hand, then slowly walked back to the rest area and sat beside Hachiman, who was resting and drinking water.
Hikaru picked up a bottle of mineral water from the ground and took a sip.
Hachiman spoke listlessly.
"Aren't you going to hang out with them?"
"I went through the trouble of dragging you out here. How could I let you clock out so easily?" Hikaru replied matter-of-factly. "Besides, compared to you, Dead Fish Eyes Monster, Yumiko-san's group is much less interesting right now."
"So there's definitely something wrong with your brain," Hachiman retorted.
"That group looks very youthful and very normie, right? And you need to collect 'youth' as material for your light novel. Yet instead of sticking with them, you cling to me. Tell me—what part of me looks youthful or normal in your eyes? Go ahead, say it. I can change."
"That group may look youthful and normal on the surface, but in reality only Yumiko-san herself is truly a normie."
Hikaru capped the bottle.
"You judge them only by their behavior in class and daily life. You slap the label 'top of the food chain' on them and then lose interest. That's why you think they're a bright, sunny group full of youth."
"But I've actually interacted with them. So I can say that the group centered around Hayato-kun and Yumiko-san is neither truly 'normie' nor truly 'youthful.'"
Hachiman's dead-fish eyes twitched slightly.
"Then what's your evaluation?"
"The majority of people in Hayato-kun and Yumiko-san's group simply have too shallow an understanding of what charisma really means."
Hikaru thought for a moment and continued.
"I've met people who, purely through their personal charm, upbringing, and eloquence, can make others feel refreshed just by talking to them. People enjoy chatting with them and willingly confide in them."
"Only people like that deserve to be called truly charismatic."
"As for Hayato-kun and Yumiko-san's group—on the surface they can talk about anything. But in reality everyone is consciously or unconsciously maintaining the atmosphere of the group. No one truly lets down their guard for a real heart-to-heart conversation."
"I see," Hachiman said after taking a sip of water.
"You mean they're fake."
"Fake?"
Hikaru showed a shocked expression.
"W-What is this chuunibyou terminology from the Nation of Dead Fish Eyes Monsters?"
"Are you pretending to be dumb now?" Hachiman rolled his eyes. "Then forget it."
"But I genuinely don't understand what you mean by 'fake,'" Hikaru complained. "As someone who creates literature, I've read countless books, films, and philosophical works. Yet I've never heard of a concept defined as Fake."
"Ahem…"
Hachiman looked slightly embarrassed.
"Didn't Yukino-san say before that friendships formed in high school can easily be destroyed by inexplicable things?"
"Bullying. Rumors. Whatever."
"Relationships that look good on the surface but collapse at the slightest impact—that's what I call fake."
"So the opposite would be real. Real friendship won't collapse because of rumors or bullying. Instead it becomes stronger."
Hikaru stared at him.
"Seriously? With your level of Chinese knowledge, you can still rank near the top in Sobu High's Chinese exams?"
Hachiman's mouth twitched.
"Little demon Ishikawa, I must remind you that you are currently insulting almost every student at Sobu High. I've already recorded that statement."
"If you anger me one day, I'll turn it into a chain message and make you famous across the entire school."
Hikaru looked genuinely surprised.
"Why not just summarize it with sayings like 'true friendship is tested in adversity' or 'every man for himself in danger'?"
"Why invent weird personal terminology like 'real' and 'fake'? That's why I wondered how someone whose Chinese isn't even up to standard could still score so high."
"Isn't Sobu High supposed to have a very high deviation score?"
"…"
"Anyway," Hikaru continued calmly, "ignoring the chuunibyou vocabulary unique to the Dead Fish Eyes Kingdom, what you summarized is actually correct."
"The group centered around Yumiko-san and Hayato-kun is indeed fake. Any small hardship could cause it to collapse."
"That's why, from an entertainment standpoint, they can't compare to you."
"After all, I possess your dark history."
"Even if you try to distance yourself when I get into trouble, I'll drag you down with me mercilessly. We'll walk together to the underworld."
"So the friendship between you and me—one that survives shared hardship—might actually be one of the rare real things in this world."
"?"
---
52. So, Would the Problem Child Have a Heart-to-Heart Talk with the Chef?
Although the discussion about real and fake was interesting, Hikaru and Hachiman were still in the middle of a tennis match.
Just as Hikaru was about to tell Hachiman to continue rallying, a familiar voice called from outside the court.
"Hikigaya-kun! Ishikawa-kun! Hina-chan and I came back to see you!"
Hachiman's dead-fish eyes instantly sharpened.
Hikaru looked toward the fence.
"Why are you two back? Aren't you going to the water park?"
Outside the fence stood only Yui-chan and Hina-san.
None of Yumiko-san's group were with them.
Hina pushed up her glasses and teased him.
"Ishikawa-sensei, making two beautiful girls talk to you through a fence seems a bit rude, don't you think?"
"Sorry, sorry."
Hikaru quickly opened the gate and let them inside.
After locking it again, he led them to the rest chairs.
"Why did you come back alone? Where are Hayato-kun and Tobe-kun?"
Hina smiled.
"Going to the water park together is fun, but Yumiko mostly wanted some alone time with Hayato, right?"
"Besides, the water park was very crowded today."
"So Yui-chan and I decided to walk around the seaside park instead."
Yui nodded happily.
"We made sure Yumiko and Hayato had some private time!"
"But after that, Tobe said she had something to do and left."
"Yamato-kun said he was interested in the baseball field and went there."
"Later Hayato messaged us on Line saying they would meet at the park entrance."
"Then they went to karaoke near Takasu Higashi Station."
"I see."
Hina's red glasses flashed strangely.
"So Yui-chan and I came to watch the legendary battle between Ishikawa-sensei and the Dead Fish Eyes Monster."
"Honestly, compared to the water park, I'm more interested in the collision between your souls."
"It should be soul-crushing annihilation," Hikaru replied calmly.
"Hikigaya, before my emperor-level offense, you can only obediently bend over and present your rear—"
"Ehehehehe—"
Hina's expression instantly collapsed.
"Snap out of it! Ishikawa-kun was joking!" Yui shouted while shaking her shoulders.
Then she turned toward Hikaru.
"Ishikawa-kun! Even if you're close with Hina-chan, you shouldn't encourage her imagination like that! People will misunderstand us!"
"What's the problem with misunderstandings?" Hikaru said calmly.
"Rumors are just rumors. Illusions."
"I don't live my life for people who change their opinions like the wind."
He sat down in the rest area.
Yui-chan and Hina-san sat beside him.
On the court, Hachiman had already picked up a racket and started hitting a tennis ball against the ground alone, pretending not to listen.
But in reality his ears were completely focused on their conversation.
Yui still looked worried.
"Ishikawa-kun, even if you don't care about rumors like Yukino-san does… won't this damage your image?"
Hikaru thought for a moment.
"Chef Yuigahama—relationships between people require screening."
"If a little gossip makes someone instantly believe I'm a bad person, that means they could easily hate their friends for other trivial reasons as well."
"So rumors are actually useful."
"They filter out people who shouldn't be my friends."
"And help me find the ones who are truly real."
He smiled slightly.
"So I don't care if people gossip about me or misunderstand my interactions with Hina-san."
"People who imagine evil things about me are just fighting monsters created by their own imagination."
"Why should I seek understanding from people like that?"
"We should live our lives to make ourselves happy."
"And keep good friends while distancing ourselves from bad ones."
He narrowed his eyes and smiled.
"And honestly… I'm looking forward to someone stepping forward to become my enemy."
"But they should remember that although modern society is civilized, conflict has only changed form."
"Strength and status are still the true passports in human society."
"Not rumors."
---
53. So, Does the Problem Child Have "Tomo-da-chi" (Friends)?
Hikaru's statement caused not only Yui-chan and Hina-san, who were sitting beside him, but even Hachiman—who was pretending to isolate himself nearby—to momentarily stop hitting the tennis ball against the ground.
The reason was simple.
For the first time, Hikaru had revealed a sharp, almost overwhelming sense of aggressiveness that came from deep within his core.
Even Hachiman, who often chatted with Hikaru about all sorts of nonsense, was seeing this side of him for the first time.
And that made Hachiman realize something.
—Hikaru had never met an enemy he truly needed to defeat.
—And at this stage, it was almost impossible for him to encounter one.
After all, Hikaru's achievements and social status were already respectable even in the adult world, let alone within Sobu High School.
Most students there hadn't even entered society yet.
How could any of them possibly become an opponent worthy of him?
Even the matter of abolishing the Tennis Club—something Hikaru had proposed in the Service Club—was being considered only from the standpoint of a student.
But if Hikaru truly wanted to dismantle the club, he wouldn't need to manipulate public opinion at school or pressure the members psychologically.
He could simply find the club members and offer them money.
"Quit the club and you'll get a thousand yen."
Or even five thousand yen.
That alone would filter out all the members who were only staying in the club to slack off.
Even Hachiman could think of such a method.
So there was no way Hikaru hadn't thought of it.
Which meant the Hikaru everyone saw—
was actually just a student who happened to be a genius light novel author.
Not a genius light novel author who happened to be a student.
The two sounded similar.
But the emphasis was completely different.
The first emphasized student.
The second emphasized author—a person who already had a position in society.
After realizing this, Hachiman couldn't help but complain inwardly.
There's no way someone like you would meet a real enemy in Sobu High.
Even people who spread rumors or casually believe them wouldn't dare oppose someone like you if they had even a little brain.
Because once Hikaru retaliated, the price they would have to pay would be far beyond what they could afford.
And the students who were actually capable of thinking wouldn't blindly believe rumors in the first place.
In other words—
Hikaru was simply waiting.
Waiting for the idiots who liked to spread rumors to expose themselves.
Then letting them reap what they sowed.
Hachiman finally spoke.
"So you're basically waiting for the idiots who spread rumors to jump out on their own so you can crush them, right?"
"I have no intention of stirring up trouble," Hikaru said while snapping his fingers.
"That's pure slander."
"Lawyer's letter warning. Please prepare to explain yourself to my lawyer and the judge."
"L-Lawyer's letter?" Yui looked completely flustered.
"Th-That's a joke… right?"
"Of course it's a joke. Hahaha."
Hikaru burst out laughing and pointed at her.
"Do I really need such complicated methods to torture the Dead Fish Eyes Monster?"
"All I have to do is bring a gift to his house, give it to his sister and parents, and have a nice friendly conversation with his entire family."
"That alone would make sure he can't sleep all night."
"Hahaha."
"If I can't sleep, you won't sleep either," Hachiman said coldly.
"If I'm suffering, I'll drag you down with me."
"Hehe."
Hikaru completely ignored the threat and casually patted Yui on the shoulder.
"Anyway, friends should protect and respect each other."
"You worry about my reputation."
"And you worry that rumors might hurt you because of my nonsense with Hina-san."
"So naturally, I have plenty of reasons to deal with the people who deliberately cause trouble."
"That way you won't have to worry about rumors affecting our friendship."
Hina pushed up her glasses and smiled.
"Ishikawa-sensei… aren't you a little too reliable?"
"A confident boy like you is extremely popular in BL manga, you know."
"Is that so?"
Hikaru laughed.
"I thought you would say everything I just said was empty boasting."
"Someone once complained that I speak too grandly sometimes."
"That it sounds like I'm lecturing people and makes me seem arrogant."
"So after that I tried to say these things less often."
He stood up and twirled his tennis racket as he walked back toward the court.
"So now I only say these useless grand principles to people who are willing to listen."
"People who are willing to tolerate my shameless self-praise."
"Even if what I say is nonsense, they're still willing to listen."
"That's actually what the old Chinese saying means—"
"'Zhou Yu beats Huang Gai: one is willing to beat, the other is willing to be beaten.'"
"It describes a situation where both sides willingly accept the situation."
"That's what friendship is."
"Mutual pursuit. Mutual understanding."
"So even if what I say is meaningless nonsense, the listener is still willing to listen."
Yui sighed softly.
"Ishikawa-kun really knows a lot…"
Hikaru grinned.
"It sounds complicated, but it's actually simple."
"Because aren't we doing exactly that right now?"
"I just said a bunch of strange grand principles and weird remarks."
"But General Ebina listened seriously."
"And you, even though you couldn't keep up with the conversation, still tried your best to understand."
"Even the Dead Fish Eyes Monster from the Dead Fish Eyes Kingdom gave his opinion."