Chapter 12: chapter xii - smile and wave, boys.Summary:
In which we learn and do a few more things, bond with our friends, and anxiously wait.
Notes:
I'm.... embarrassed.
No no, sh sh, let me say this- I'm a lying liar who lies.
"Next chapter we're finally having Halloween, and I'd prepare for some emotional and raw subjects if I were yall.
I'll try to post this Saturday, but if I miss it, then I might consider starting posting only on Wednesdays."
LIES. I'M SO SORRY! IT'S BEEN FIVE MONTHS! But to my defense, my mom got sick, so I had to take care of her, then college happened, then I was about to move out alone, then THAT didn't happen, then my dad moved back, then I got sick- it has been some very rough couple of months, let me tell you.
But most of all, this chapter has been almost completely written for five months, but I could NOT, for the life of me, make the transition to Halloween and what happens. Like, I had over 7k written, but it was in a bunch of parts because I was having a hard time making the transitions.
So yesterday I sat down and literally decided, fuck it, I'm postponing Halloween for one more chapter because it deserves its own, and there is plot stuff in this and more hints for Star of just WHAT her divination thing is, besides some nice bonding time.
So yes, Halloween is not for another chapter and THEN I think it'll start picking up the pace, but honestly, I think I'm avoiding writing it because it's in the books and I'm genuinely afraid of falling into just copying the books, even if it will NOT be canon-compliant, but whatever.
Also, I'm still responding to the comments, and there are... a lot. There's a lot. So I'll try to take my time with it, but I promise you, I'VE SEEN IT. I'VE SEEN IT ALL, EVEN THE SHITTY ONES WHICH LEFT ME ANXIOUS ABOUT OPENING THE NOTIFICATIONS EVERY TIME I RECEIVED A COMMENT.
Also, if you're being mean to me, fuck you, i'm sensitive, alright?!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
PREVIOUSLY:
Star learned that she gets to keep her name if she marries someone; Our MC also started using the Room of Requirement; Got herself an enemy and into a fistfight, earning two weeks of detention with Sprout, and started asking for help from an Adult™.
The next weeks were spent in a haze if I was honest with myself, and I had very little time to spend with my Slytherins even though Blaise always seemed to be squirming to tell whatever gossip was going on in Slytherin because of me.
I've heard plenty.
Very little was true and most were hilarious.
I particularly liked the ones where Pulcey cried and pissed himself in fear, and it brought me great joy to fake-lunge at older Slytherins who liked to get mouthy and stupid Ravenclaws that sided with the boy, their flinches never failed to make Ron snicker.
You tackle a boy twice your size once and suddenly it's like you're an unhinged animal.
Either way, I wasn't too phased by how people were treating me. It wasn't all that bad- actually, it wasn't really even a little bad. Most people found it hilarious, and it's not like brawling on the corridors was rare. Do you really think that with a bunch of children living and studying together 24/7, there wouldn't be fights breaking up once in a while?
Pluh-ese! Oliver Wood of all people was the one to pat my back and tell me that I just started the brawlings sooner than expected, seeing as once Quidditch season started, so did the fighting.
It only stirred others up because I was a firstie and initiated a fight with a third-year quidditch player.
Again, it passed in a haze.
I'd squeeze in some training session after my detention and then would spend the rest of the night slumped against Harry, who was equally tired from his own quidditch training, or I'd bicker with Ron between doing our homework and poking Harry until he did his.
Neville was my angel with his soothing companion during detention, and more than once the boy saved me from the slimy death grips of the plants. Later on, he'd help me with Herbology assignments as I was quickly finding out that I did not have a green thumb with the lessons progressing.
There were no changes with the Patronus and deep down I knew I'd only start having some improvement when I came face to face with mum (hopefully during the Christmas hols), and I already had plans to sneak out if she dared saying that I couldn't go home with a bunch of redheads and a green-eyed little brother. Howlers be damned.
The twins were even starting to hint at showing me the damn map! I'm sure they'd agree to sneak away through Hogsmead with us if I asked nicely.
Granted, they had only made one comment or another. A joking "she really is up to no good" here and a "do you have your mischief managed?" there, but still!
It was without saying that Snape was going hard on docking points from me with all the pranks going around between the three of us, he seemed to understand the pattern that mine were usually muggle based with a few charm tweakings with how many times Pulcey turned up to be at the end of a prank, though he was suspiciously silent when Quirrell was the one with rashes and coloured teeth.
I tried to keep it respectful and less target-y, unless we're talking about Pulcey, of course. He can choke.
Not that I was done targeting the twins either. They seemed to find some kind of thrill in making my hair different colors and textures, and I was even thinking of writing a damn paper about magic showing on goddamn hair with how much my mood changed depending on how my hair looked.
By far, the worst had been the limpy pale blue. It had me weirdly lethargic and I swear my magic just didn't make embarrassing noises out of my wand out of sheer stubbornness.
There was definitely a pattern of me constantly being able to take them by surprise with muggle ways while they landed heavily on magic, not like I wasn't weaving Charms into my pranks as well.
What else… Ah, yes.
Hermione.
Something happened. I had no idea what, but something did.
She just… wasn't around?
The girl had taken to ignoring the boys ever since Harry received his broom, and soon after, she did the same to me. Not that I was complaining, but I was surprised by the lack of nagging about the points I lost, or about the tussle I got with another student, even about me playing my guitar in our dorm.
She had been suspiciously quiet, only glaring from a distance, or sending me these long looks that I had no way of interpreting. Hell, maybe I was imagining it, with how tired I had been the past weeks, maybe she did nag me and I simply didn't notice.
To be completely honest, I didn't care.
It might've been stupid or selfish of me, but with how tired, frustrated and emotionally ready to snap at anyone outside my friends that so much as breathed wrong in my direction, I just didn't care.
I couldn't.
A part of me (a big part) knew that I was this close to doing something else I'd regret, and with Halloween so close I didn't want to try my luck on being the one to push Hermione on the troll's way. Mum hadn't answered my message through the ring, and I had yet to receive any letter other than the one I got chastising me for getting in a fight.
It left a bitter taste on my tongue seeing Harry receive his letters, how Ron was sure to have a paragraph for himself on them while there wasn't a single greeting for me. I hated the feeling that clawed at my chest, that itched the back of my throat and made me want to tear through something. An unknown sharp coldness that I had to constantly keep in check lest I gave in to the urges to add in the cruelty in my pranks, or be nasty in my spellwork or bickering with the twins or Blaise, or (Morgana forbid) actually goad Granger.
Funnily enough, it was Harry that always managed to keep it at bay.
A gentle elbow on my ribs, a knock of his head on my shoulder, a raised brow my way, a quiet question about how I was, his presence-
It was all enough to remind me that there wasn't a reason for me to give in to the stupid urges to be cruel, to be a snotty little bastard.
I was more than a little curious about what it was. A kind of recklessness I never noticed, or a weird tug I had no idea where it came from. It nagged on the back of my brain, but I chose to ignore it in turn of pretending it wasn't there, out of embarrassment. Because who the hell did I think I was?! Some Jekyll and Hyde shite? Not here, not in this universe.
It's also not like I could be mad at them for it when they were so clearly blooming under some healthy adult attention. Harry more than Ron, who was still a little embarrassed about getting in contact with mum, but seemed to enjoy the praises nonetheless. But Harry? Seeing him tear through the packages or happily write about his studies and practice was enough for me not to demand him to write a paragraph for me.
At least it was all good material to hide behind the shaky walls of the bastardized Occlumency, shoving the feeling and ideas in the corners of my mind.
Fun fact?
When in the books Snape said that Occlumency was a dying obscure branch of magic? He meant it.
All that schmuff about the Slytherins knowing Occlumency since infancy, and that's why they were good at politicking and keeping a straight face? It was bullshit.
I asked Daph - the one who would either bluntly tell me that they couldn't tell me, or would just teach me if she knew -, and her response was a very clear "what the fuck are you talking about?"
In other words of course. The girl was too proud to ever swear like a mere commoner.
It seemed they knew what Legilimency was, but Occlumency? Nope.
Not even Blaise, who was the epitome of what I considered "Slytherin", didn't really know what it was beside the basic understanding that it was the opposite of Legilliments.
All of it prompted a long search around the Library only for me to realize why Hermione hadn't been able to help Harry when he was training under Snivellus. There was shit on the mind magic.
Nada.
Absolutely nothing.
It was around that time that I remembered that Snape had said it was an obscure branch of magic and that of course, it wouldn't have any books about it in the damn library.
So off to The Hoard™ I went.
I felt a little like I was cheating, finding all the answers I needed in that little pocket of knowledge when the normal way failed me. But beggars can't be choosers and I mostly stuck to my gut instinct to not mess with some of the books.
Sure, the room would drop the ones I needed in front of me, and I knew that Legillimens and Occlumency weren't inherently evil, but the reason it was an obscure branch of magic was that it tethered uncomfortably close with what originated the Imperius curse.
Mind magic was dangerous, and I didn't dare even open the ones with too bold titles about dominating minds, or cracking and manipulating them. Not yet, at least.
Perhaps later, when things got worse, I might revisit them just to know what I'd be dealing with, but in a 12 year old body and a who-knows-how-old mind, the idea of reading such oily material had my stomach churning uncomfortably.
The reading was dry and shady, no matter how much the authors tried to avoid talking about how it was bordering on dark magic, and on paper, it seemed easy enough, right?
There were a few ways to build up a solid protection. There was the hardest one, that was basically just don't think. No thoughts, head empty- clear your mind, always have it cleared and you'll know when someone is trying to push an idea or trying to know what's in your head. But who can live like that? Honestly.
There were a few others, meditation, mostly, compartmentalization, etc. But I was going for the easiest, because baby steps, that's why.
It was a little meditation and a lot of imagination. I felt a little like I had read it from 'Occlumency for dummies', but it was the only one that felt… right? That worked?
Still shitty, and it led me down a rabbit hole of piecing together why I had so much trouble with Transfiguration.
Fucking-
Visualization.
It was slow work, and it seemed like by the end of the day, after I spent hours thinking as if things were getting put in boxes behind a wall, that I had thought nothing at all, and everything crashed down and spilled, and I panicked with the rush of emotions before taking a deep breath and trying to put it back behind the wall.
But it was like I couldn't finish visualizing whatever I wanted as protection.
I was supposed to imagine it constantly, but not force it. Just… think that there was something protecting my thoughts and memories.
It got easier! Sure! Like, I had been able to go two whole days instinctively doing it before remembering I was doing it and then losing grip of the walls.
Like blinking! You do it naturally, but as soon as you remember you should be doing it? Oof.
At least I was getting a very cool façade in my quiet time.
With Halloween approaching that week, on a heavy class day nonetheless, I kept my wits to myself, chancing any look at Hermione to make sure that despite her self-imposed silent treatment, she wasn't having any negative interactions with Ron. Not that it'd take long for something to happen with how tight her shoulders were by the start of the week.
Seeing her stressed out was stressing me out. Honestly, the unhealthy amount of tea and hot chocolate I was drinking had me constantly carrying one of the kitchen's ugly mugs.
And complaining about it being ugly all the while, but that was Ron and Harry's problem.
"Miss McKinnon, if you'd stay for a moment." I schooled my expression at the Scottish accent, only gently knocking my shoulder with Nev, who had made me company that class, when he made to stay behind before I lightly pushed him in Ron's direction.
The redhead nodded at me and gripped both boys' robes, pulling them out with him as I made my way to the professor, thinking over what I had done that day.
Other than putting itching powder on Snape's dragon-hide gloves, nothing much; and I didn't think he used it yet.
"Yes, professor?"
Her face was pinched, lips pressed together tightly as I stared up at her with a raised brow waitingly. Her eyes swiped over me warily, taking in my face, the tightness of my shoulders and my defensive posture before clearing her throat silently.
"I've heard you asked Professor Sprout a few questions if Hogwarts has allowances for students who cannot afford their own materials, and for her help on the matter." I waited for her to continue silently, raising my other brow at the stretched silence.
"Yes, I have." It ended up sounding a little like a question, and I could feel my own irritation rising at the signs that she was getting frustrated. "Ron hasn't been able to perform well in classes because of his wand, it's half-broken and from one of his older brothers. It's dangerous and-"
"Yes, Yes." She interrupted me sharply, and I felt my eye twitch as my temper rose, pressing my tongue against the front of my teeth and making me breathe slowly to not snap at her. "What I would like to know, is why you did not come with your questions to me, seeing as I am your Head of House."
The silence stretched on again, but it was better than the scoff or the sharp laughter I wanted to release.
Was she fucking serious? Nah, did she really ask me that?
I pursed my lips to hide the fact that I wanted to laugh at her stern face, looking her up and down quickly to take in and buy me some more time. How should I go about this?
"The truth?" At her sharp nod, I hummed quietly, licking my dry lips and shrugging. "I know you don't like me, and I don't trust you to either answer me truthfully, to see that it's an important matter, or put as much effort as I know Professor Sprout did."
She spluttered and looked like I had just slapped her across the face, but I didn't back down, looking into her eyes unflinchingly even as the color rose from her cheeks.
"I thought you would've been hostile or impatient to my questions, as you were when I questioned where Harry got his broom." Another shrug, though I noted with some amusement that she flinched at my jab. "I didn't want your aversion to me to get in the way of helping my friend."
"I would never-!"
"Yes, but I don't know that, do I?" I cut her off snidely, pressing my tongue to my teeth again to stop myself from saying something else when she puffed up like a bird. "I apologize," Morgana, why did it sound like she was ripping out my teeth? "But not for my reasoning." My chin lifted stubbornly, and I refused to back down when she glared.
"I would've never gotten in the way of helping one of my students, Miss McKinnon."
Right, if you say so.
"Is there anything else you wanted to ask me, ma'am?"
Her lips twisted again, eyes narrowing down at me.
"What makes you believe I have any- any aversion to you?" My 'are you fucking serious? ' face didn't seem to amuse her as she flushed angrily again. "Well?"
"Professor, not once have you praised or commented on my spellwork despite the times I've perfected a transfiguration before Granger," I raised a finger when she opened her mouth to interrupt me, lips twitching at her indignant face with the gesture. "And I am twelve, not stupid. You are not the only professor to dislike me or be wary of me, though you and Professor Snape are the ones who show it most. Now, whether that is because I look like my Aunt Marlene and she was real piece of work,"
Her breath hitched as I was speaking, and she froze, blinking down at me in surprise, but I ignored it in turn of looking at her knowingly.
"Or because I am a McKinnon and your family had pledged loyalty to mine and you think I'll somehow use the power to- to do whatever, I do not know. But I do know that you've shown you do not care for me, and so, I don't trust you to have my best interests in mind or that you'd care to help me… Besides, I didn't think you'd have the time, seeing as we didn't get any introduction from you when we were sorted."
Again, she looked like I slapped her across the face, and pissed on her mother's grave before spitting at her shoes.
McGonagall surprised me by slowly sitting down, looking at me strangely and in silence instead of screaming or docking points for calling her out. She looked at my face intently, as if studying me while I waited for the explosion that never came.
"I… see."
I was going to be late for DADA, not that I cared much about the class, but still.
"Anything else, Professor?" She studied me quietly again, shaking her head softly and making me nod. "If that's all…"
"It is, run along, now, Miss McKinnon." With a jerky nod, I hurried out, sprinting to my next class to avoid any professors or prefects that could give me detention for being out of class.
Well, at least now she knows that I know she doesn't like me.
Quirrell looked at me waitingly when I entered the class, making me grimace at him in a faux-apology.
"I'm sorry, Professor." I blinked dumbly at him, as if I didn't cuss him out in my head constantly and probably loudly enough that he knew how much he disgusted me. "Professor McGonagall kept me a little after class."
"I-I s-s-se-ee." He also sent me a fake smile, and I felt my stomach churning at the sight of it, feeling the hairs on the back of my neck rising at the sharp coldness in his eyes. "I-I f-f-fear I st-t-till n-n-need to g-give y-you d-d-detent-tion, M-Miss-s M-M-M-Mc-c-Kin-non."
Oh shite.
Neville, the delight that he was, saved me a seat behind our two friends and smiled sympathetically at my scowl about having detention just when I was done with the two weeks of dealing with dirt under my nails.
Though I'll admit that the scowl was just a mask to hide the fear of having to be alone with him in detention.
Maybe I could break my arm the day of detention and escape by staying overnight at the Hospital Wing.
Or not.
Breaking an arm sounds a little too extreme.
I'd settle for breaking a hand.
★★★
A week later and with no mention of the detention I was supposed to take with Quirrell and I was feeling hopeful that he might've forgotten about it, since, you know- He's busy… plotting… with his… Blood Nazi master… stuck.. In the back of his head…
You know… The usual.
But it was to my great disappointment (and panic) that I received a note the day before Halloween that I'd be serving detention with him the next day… On Halloween.
Now, I didn't consider myself a coward, but the thought of being alone in the same room as an angry and plotting Voldemort had me shaking so hard I had to stick my hands under my legs before the boys noticed them.
Glancing at the High Table, I tried sticking the fear into a box in the back of my mind without much success and quickly took my eyes away from the professors, seeing Snape narrow his eyes at me in suspicion before I reached for my cup of tea.
I was screwed.
"You ok, Starflower?" I jumped at Fred's voice, blinking up at him as he sat by my side, his twin settling across from him and already busying himself with talking to Lee. "You're looking peaky."
Gently slapping away the hand he pressed on my forehead, I sent him a tight smile as he snickered after showing him the note.
"Just a few weeks ago I was done with my two weeks of detention and now this." He snickered again, making me roll my eyes and pout behind my mug with him laughing at my plight. "And I don't like Quirrell."
"You don't like any of the Professors." Ron chimed in from George's side, rolling his eyes as Harry and I snorted in sync.
"Not true, I like Flitwick and Sprout… And I like Professor Sinistra a little. Quirrell has his own category of dislike from me. But yeah, the rest can absolutely choke-" A loud cough interrupts me and I look at Neville as he picked on his breakfast, looking pointedly at his food and with his face red.
A throat clearing behind me had my body locking in panic, eyes wide at Ron, who mirrored me before looking down at his plate and shoveling food into his mouth without care, hiding his flushing face from view as Fred turned his head away from us to press his mouth on his shoulder while Harry shared panicked wide eyes with me.
He's the only real one. Oh God
When I slowly looked over my shoulder, I watched McGonagall raise a thin brow at me, sternly looking down her nose at me as I gulped.
"Miss McKinnon, I'd like to see you in my office after classes."
"Y-Yes, Professor." She stared at me for a few more seconds before nodding sharply and briskly walking to the High Table while I slumped against Harry. "She's going to kill me. It was good while it lasted."
Fred was cackling by my right as Harry patted my arm mockingly; Ron was snickering while Nev was sending me a pitying and nervous smile.
"I'll keep your notes and tell your mum where to find the body."
"Write me a nice eulogy, Harry."
"Um-hum, the best. I'll ask Granger to check the spelling and if she wants to add anything."
I gasped dramatically under our group's laugh, pressing a hand against my heart and moving to slump against Fred now, looking at Harry's amused face in faux-betrayal while Fred nearly had me in a chokehold, too busy laughing with his brothers and Lee, who had been watching us since McGonagall made her exit.
"But Harry, it's my funeral! You're supposed to say nice things about the dead! You know what-? Nev, you're in charge of writing my eulogy now."
He smiled at me, eyes twinkling with mirth before nodding deeply as if he was doing me a favor.
"Orright', I'll see if the hat can sing it."
"See, Harry James? Nev gets it! "
"Oi! Why can't I do it?"
I sneered at Ron mockingly, squinting my eyes at him and looking down from my nose in a perfect Malfoy imitation while Fred loosed his grip on me, letting me twist around freely but still keeping me somewhat tucked under his arm.
"Do you even know how to write, Westheby?"
Harry couldn't handle it as he curled over the table to laugh and the surrounding laughter filled me with joy, even with the looming threats the next day brought.
Ron cussed me out again, and I had to dodge a muffin mid-laugh, chest warm as I snickered at his fake shudder.
"Bloody hell, you looked just like him."
"Better him than Pulcey."
Harry tugged on my braid a little, almost hesitantly as if testing his boundaries with how much he could get away.
It was known by us that while my love language was touching, the way to annoy me was to physically hurt me.
Roughhousing was a no with me, but they had been slowly finding ways to annoy me that didn't get me actually upset.
By they I mean the Weasleys.
Ron found out that he could get away lightly slapping my arms and shoulder, though I'm sure he was close to just smacking me upside the head after seeing Daphne do it once and only receiving an annoyed glare from me; Fred discovered flicking me was the easiest way to have me annoyed and snappish, but they seemed to find moody-me funny, so… yeah.
George was my favorite, he was the gentle one of the three, and the biggest he did was poke my sensitive sides, which only really had me paying attention, but I digress.
Harry tugging my hair granted him a glare and a gentle nudge.
"Don't say that, anyone is better than Malfoy."
"The two of them do look alike, don't they?" Lee chimed in, tilting his head to the side and squinting to look at me as I made a face with his words.
"Bloody inbred purebloods, I bet we share some blood too," I grunted, smirking while Ron made gagging noises and Harry snickered. "What are you gagging at? Mine is a mystery, you on the other hand…"
"Whu?!"
George laughed at that while Fred smirked and leaned closer from over the table to whisper to his younger brother.
"Did you forget grandma Cedrella was a Black?" We laughed at the way Ron paled and dramatically dropped his fork.
"Yeah, and that tosser's mom was born a Black too. So technically, Ronald, you're cousins."
I never saw Ron as disgusted and affronted as when I pointed that out, and it didn't take long for one of the prefects to tell us to pipe down with the noise, not that it mattered much with how we were already leaving for class, and it was only Granger's angrily stomping ahead after glaring our way that let us know who had made the complaint.
Ron exchanged disgruntled looks with Harry while Neville sent me a tight smile; I didn't really know his relationship with Hermione, nor did I really remember if they were supposed to be closer and my presence had Nev latching to me instead of the girl, but even I could see that she was getting on everyone's nerve.
Heck, even the professors were getting peeved with her not letting others answer in class, cutting in before raising her hand, or with her monstrous essays where she'd go over the assigned lengths, as Snape had tactfully pointed out in front of the whole class, especially when someone would ask a question to a professor and she'd answer it in that condescending tone that mocked you for not knowing about it.
Don't even get me started on Pavarti and Lavender.
Every night it was like toeing into a warzone instead of my room, and it was starting to wear the Prefects down with how much the girl had them butting in to solve shit.
Funnily enough, the four of us were the only ones to ignore her and therefore avoid confrontations, even if I could see how she was just itching to have a row with Ron or me.
More with me than with the redhead, but the point stays the same.
I grunted at the two heavy arms dropping on me; Fred rounded my shoulders and George rested his arm over my head, making a mock of the height difference the same way I did with Harry.
"Still haven't talked to her, hm?" George hummed, peering down at me with a raised brow that had me feeling surprisingly ashamed.
"I will, I'm just… waiting."
"For…?" His twin drawled from my other side and I shrugged meekly, feeling the sudden urge to skip ahead and avoid their judging eyes.
"I have a bad feeling for Halloween, alright? I just don't want to set her off."
They shared glanced over my head and I tried to put a lid on the actual shame of how it sounded like to them; I wasn't afraid of Hermione, but it's not like I could come out and say why I was waiting for the troll to fuck off before finally going at it with her.
"Orright', if you say so." I made a face at their synced patronizing voices, ribbing them hard and finally skipping ahead to press my side against Neville, who jumped a little at the contact before realizing who it was and smiling up at me.
Classes were the usual, and besides McGonagall reminding me to find her in her office after classes, it went without a hitch if not a little lighter than usual with Halloween the next day. The professors didn't assign any homework, and Sprout even used the class to show us the cool dangerous plants instead of having us re-pot Dittany, which was a pain to care for- I had killed enough of them during my detentions to know that despite all the dirt I gathered under my nails, I was no closer of being as good as Neville at Herbology as I was to making friends with Granger.
Neville and Ron were asked to stay behind by Sprout, hopefully about the wand situations, and Harry decided to wait for them while I had to make my way to McGonagall's office, dreading every step as I wondered what it was about.
It probably dawned on her that I insulted her the whole time she interrogated me and now she'd be assigning me more detention.
Honestly, I used to be an honor student, what happened?!
I paused in front of her door, biting my cheek and trying to remember if I'd actually done something or if she had heard me expressing my contempt towards the staff and was about to tear me a new one.
Gathering my Gryffindor guts, I knocked twice sharply, waiting for permission before finally stepping inside.
McGonagall seemed to have just arrived too and was busying herself with going over whatever was piling her desk; it was filled with- well, everything.
There were chalices, assignments, buttons, rats, cages, boxes, piles and piles of paper and I was sure the only reason they weren't toppling over was because of some charm, there were needles and beetles and basically every single item that she used in class.
For some reason I expected different for her office, having been to Sprout and Flitwick's. Both also had traces of the class they taught, of course; Sprout was filled with Hufflepuff stuff and plants besides the delicious chocolate chip cookies and comfortable seats while Flitwick was cleaner, in a cool blue and silver instead of bronze like his house colors, and it was one of my favorite places to be, full of pretty and neat charms that Flitwick would delight in teaching me after I was done pretending to ask questions about the class.
I imagined Snivellus' office would have the same feeling if I stepped into it.
It was uncomfortable and cluttered, it didn't seem to be made in mind that the kids under her care would search for her here and I wasn't surprised that no-one really came here to vent to McGonagall. I had barely sat on the simple wooden chair and I already wanted to leave.
Waiting in silence for her to be done with whatever she was doing had me slightly peeved and feeling slighted, she barely acknowledged me arriving and I could feel my scowl setting deeper and deeper the longer the sounds of her quill scratching the paper filled the silence.
It might've been 10 or 5 minutes until she was done, and in terms of keeping someone waiting in front of you, it was pretty bad.
I wasn't even offered cookies! And I know she had them!
Man, fuck McGonagall.
I didn't return her tight smile when she finally looked my way, keeping my scowl and closed off posture; arms crossed over my chest and slumped on the uncomfortable chair with an unimpressed face.
There were another few seconds of tense silence as I waited for her to speak first, watching with sharp eyes the way her eye twitched and her thin lips quivered, opening and closing slightly as if she didn't know how to start.
"I'll be brief, Miss McKinnon." McGonagall finally spoke, straightening up and crossing her fingers over the table. "I asked you here because I owe you an apology."
There was silence as my brows shot up.
Did I hear that right?
She cleared her throat again, unwavering in her stubbornness of keeping eye contact with me as I finally rightened my posture on the uncomfortable chair.
"I- I have let the judgment I have of a past student you- you look remarkably alike, to cloud my judgment of you. I apologize for the treatment you've received from me, all your actions up until now have been in the best interest of others and I- I failed to recognize it. For that I am sorry."
I nodded slowly, studying her flustered face.
"Alright…"
"I… I also think you'd be glad to know that I have organized with Professor Sprout to have Weasley and Longbottom pick their new wands this weekend as we already have their guardians' approval." She finally looked away, moving to fuss over the stack of papers in a dignified manner as I nodded once more, smiling when McGonagall made eye contact again, even if it was a tad too tight.
"Thank you, Professor." McGonagall nodded, clearing her throat reaching for something amidst her mess of a table and extending it to me.
"Cookies?"
Now we're talking.
The boys were already chittering happily on our uncomfortable couch when I arrived still munching on the cookies. Sprout's were better, but a cookie was a cookie.
Or a biscuit, I suppose.
Ron and Neville had bright grins on their faces when I plopped by Neville's side, waiting for one of them to speak as I raised my brows questioningly.
"Professor Sprout is taking us for our wands this weekend!" Neville whisper yelled, nearly bouncing on his spot and leaning into me as I smiled, cheeks puffed with the dry biscuit and raising my thumbs happily.
"Can you believe it?" Ron looked like he was on cloud nine, a happy flush on his cheeks and ears, looking every bit of his 11 years as he should. "Sprout said it took her so long to tell us because Nev's grams and mum needed a little talking to."
"So that means I won't have to take anyone with me if that thing explodes?" Ron glared at me in a mock of Blaise's cold sneer, reaching over Neville to yank my hair while Harry laughed and I hissed in pain amidst snickering. "Oi! I'm joking! Bloody hell, trying to make me bald, are you?"
I reached over Neville the same way, pushing his head away and he grumbled, slapping my hand away as the boy between us ducked his head and raised his arms to defend himself as my redhead friend and I exchanged half-hearted slaps.
"McKinnon! Ron! No fighting!"
We snickered at Percy calling for us from one of the nearby tables, exchanging grins when he huffed and pointedly returned to whatever he was writing, muttering under his breath and shaking his head when we finally eased away from each other.
The four of us spent the afternoon relaxing in a surprising turn of events as the Professors had eased on the assignments in face of Halloween, though at some point I had nodded off against Neville to compensate for Astronomy the night before.
It was a good idea, after all, who knew if I'd get the sleep that night!
Dinner woke me up with the twins pranking Percy causing myself and quite a few Gryffindors around to spend the rest of the feast warily poking the plates and waiting for explosions after the ordeal, much to their sadistic delight.
I wondered if Gryffindor had been so low on points in Canon or if that was my work by egging the Twins on. Though I made up for my lost points with Flitwick.
It didn't take long for the girls to sleep, as I found out that the best days to escape Granger's notice at night were Tuesdays after Astronomy, or Wednesdays, as she was too tired from not napping at Binns' class to try to stay up to catch me in the act.
It was probably a little after midnight when I hauled my trusty messenger bag over my shoulder and snuck out of the dorm, wand in hand and checking for sounds in the dormitories or the older students loitering around.
Percy was usually one of them as he was probably running thin with his O.W.L.s.
Honest to Morgana, I was considering slipping him some sleeping potion one of these days.
"Star?"
I froze at the quiet call for me, glancing over my shoulder warily before sighing in relief at the sight of Harry looking at me in confusion, curled out of view in front of the fireplace.
"What are you doing out of bed?" Harry sent me an unimpressed look, raising his brows in disbelief and making me purse my lips at his quiet call out. "Shutup."
I smiled at his snort, quietly approaching him after sending a wistful look at the entrance, pushing him to the side a little to squirm in the chair with him and cover us with the throw blanket on the chair opposite of his. My green-eyed friend allowed me to do so without much fuss, adjusting to give me space before huddling closer to me and resting his head on my bony shoulder as I pressed my cheek on top of his hair.
We sat in silence, only the crackles of the dying flames filling the air as I waited for him to open up on why he was awake. I had an idea of why, of course.
Unlike OG Harry, my Harry James was much more knowing about what Halloween meant to him and to the Wizarding World, and the picture he was clutching might be another clue.
He finally moved, resting the picture on his knee to let me see his parents.
Mum had gone through Aunt Marlene's things that she managed to salvage from her apartment and from Fairview, nevermind that she suddenly decided to face one of her fears and step into the Manor she grew up again even after I asked if I'd ever get to see it, but she did, and with it came the unsurprising discovery that Aunt Marlene had been Harry's Godmother.
Mum found a bunch of pictures of Harry with his parents when they were in hiding, and there were even some of him and Marlene, he was almost a newborn in those and they were both sweet and silly; it was mostly Aunt Marlene rocking Harry in her arms and crying, or of Harry inside her leather jacket with her big glasses on his tiny face, laughing at whoever was taking the picture while she smiled down at him.
Harry had been heartbroken when he found out his Godmother had died merely a few months before his parents, but we all knew the reason for him tearing up had been over the pictures of him and his parents.
The one he was holding was his favorite, as far as I could tell.
It was the only Christmas he spent with them; James and Lily were both holding Harry between them, swaying gently in their heavily decorated living room. James had reindeer antlers and Lily was wearing a Santa beanie while they had dressed Harry as a little elf. He was laughing, clutching their sweaters, and snuggling into their warmth while his parents basked in each other's company, lovingly exchanging gazes before Lily dropped a kiss on Harry's covered head.
The writing in the back was long and by then we all knew it was James who wrote it, his handwriting was cleaner and fancier, in cursive and he tended to ramble when naming the pictures.
Harry turned the picture to read James' words again, and I smiled sadly at it.
Harry's first Christmas, 1980.
Lils dressed him as a lying elf, she says it's Santa's helper, who's this Santa bloke and why would Harry need to help him? He's a babe, he can't help anyone! Maybe they're house elves and muggles don't know better.
She told me Santa isn't real just now and I'm glad, I would've hexed him had he come through our chamney!
We Lily spent the day baking gingerbread cookies with Harry and I helping getting in the way and eating half of them without her looking. In our defense, they were very yummy, as Harry eloquentely expressed when he shoved three in his mouth despite not having proper teeth to chew them.
It was a good day, a bit quieter without the boys here, but Harry and Lily are enough.
Our family is enough, even though we missed you and the boys, Lene.
Merry Christmas!
His fingers trailed the ending words, following the fancy loop James had on his 'F' on the word ' family ' before turning the picture back around.
"I never liked Halloween." He murmured, eyes focused on the moving picture as I hummed quietly. "Back at the Dursleys it was just another day for Dudley to show all the candy I couldn't have, and Aunt Petunia was always meaner… I thought… I thought this year I'd get to- to eat a lot of candy and… and just enjoy a day free of the Dursleys… But Daph told me how people are going to act and talk to me tomorrow."
They were going to thank him.
We all knew; we've been redirecting people when they tried to do it that week, Daph and I were the most successful ones in doing so, either hexing or walking away with Harry. He hadn't understood at first, but it didn't take long for him to realize why people were trying to thank him in the corridors and between classes. Harry's face when it dawned on him… God, it broke my heart.
"You can take a sick day," I whispered back, pressing my cheek harder on his head and sighing when he slowly shook it. "You don't have to prove anything to anyone, Harry James."
"I know." We spent a few more minutes in silence, just looking at the picture even as the fireplace finally went out, leaving us with only the moonlight to light the Common Room. "What were you going to do?"
"Halloween prank." Harry backed away slightly at my slow words, quirking an amused smile as I shrugged embarrassedly. "The twins are a few ahead of me, if this one works out I'll even out the score."
He looked at me in contemplation, and I narrowed my eyes when he pursed his lips in thought, nodding sharply and sending me a resolute look.
"I'll help you."
"Eh?"
Almost half an hour later and Harry was trailing after me after exhausting me with his arguments and pulling the puppy eyes, grinning wildly and looking around every five seconds, thrilled about being out so late at night but still nervous about getting caught.
"So what's the-"
"Sh!" Harry scowled at me but kept silent as we snuck past the entrance into the Great Hall.
He gasped quietly, looking up in wonder and making me smile softly; the ceiling was charmed to show the stars and the moon closer than we'd be able to see if we went outside, and after curfew, the charmed candles snuffed themselves out.
It was breathtaking. I had only noticed on my second time trying to prank the professors, not as jittery about being out of bed as I had been when I pranked Snape.
"Wow."
"I know… C'mon, let's start with the Slytherin table." The boy still had his eyes glued to the ceiling, but dutifully followed me before finally dropping under the table when I tugged his shirt.
"What are we doing, again?"
He sat by my side, squinting at the light from my wand hitting his face as I opened my messager bag to take out the stack of paper and hand him a few, seeing his curious face as I smirked.
"We're gluing this under the table. They're charmed to activate with certain words, I don't know how to make it have a bigger radius than three meters, so we have to put a bunch of them under the tables."
"...And what does it activate?" I shrugged, my grin deepening when he looked at the paper in suspicion.
"It's nothing bad, really harmless and it'll only last two days at most."
"Thank God, the week of dung smell the twins pulled off was traumatizing." Snorting, I shook my head and took one of the papers for myself to demonstrate what to do.
"Flitwick told me to search the sticking charm, it's pretty simple and there's not really any wand movement. Watch," I put the piece of paper on the underside of the table, touching my wand to the paper and dragging over the corners of it while muttering the incantation. "Tenax Lentum." There was a faint suction noise as the paper easily stuck to the table, no crinkles or chance to take it out immediately in sight. "There. Give it a little space between another paper and go to town."
"Flitwick helped you?"
"He likes to see how I can use charms." I shrugged with a cheeky grin, patting Harry's shoulder as he huffed a laugh and shook his head in disbelief. "Start on this side that I'll work on the other and we meet in the middle."
"Yeah, yeah… What's the spell again?"
"Harry."
Over two hours and a half later and we were done, with Harry grinning like mad despite looking tired and I had to thank him for his help or else I'd only finish it by the time people were waking up.
I was so happy having Harry helping and bantering with me that I only noticed the damned cat a little too late.
Usually, I was more alert to someone doing rounds or of the ghosts, but Harry's presence had me busy snickering and just genuinely enjoying the work done, wondering if that was how the twins felt sharing jokes and ribbings.
Definitely better than being alone, having someone to share your mischief with.
He stumbled on my back when I froze in panic at Madam Nor-r-ra's glaring eyes on me, and I swore she fucking smirked at seeing us. It didn't take long for her to yowl loudly in alarm, making Harry and I look at each other in panic, but it seemed that we were on the same page as we reached for each other's hands and fucking bolted.
We didn't see where we were going, we just moved in the opposite direction of the loud limping stomps from Filch, who was dangerously fast despite his age. I ended up having to throw a shield at the cat when she tried swiping - viciously, I might add - at our ankles to stop us, leaving her spittling and hissing behind as we got out the stairs.
For all the times I snuck out after curfew without cheating (read: having the Map or the invisibility cloak), only trusting my gut and senses, I had yet to get chased or caught like that, so you can hardly blame me for falling for the Plot Trap.
Besides, the door was unlocked.
Harry had pushed me in, promptly turning to press his ear on the door as I froze staring at the absolute monster of a three headed dog.
I had successfully avoided Harry and Ron finding out about Fluffy, I don't remember what I changed, how it was supposed to play out with the boys and Hermione stumbling on the dog, but I had.
It was suspicious how Harry would learn about the dog right on the deadline to see Snape get hurt.
I didn't like what it implied.
I didn't move, afraid to make any sudden movements and cause it to sic on us. The nose from the head in the middle twitched as it caught our scent, and I felt my blood run cold at the other heads also noticing something was wrong.
The Cerberus wasn't- Fuck, no Gryffindor guts could save me from the fear running through my veins at it; Fluffly, unlike in the movies, looked vicious. The teeth were huge and sharp, the eyes were mad and it looked mean, already frothing at the mouth.
"I think we lost him." Harry sighed quietly, and I slowly clutched his shirt, ready to yank him out of the way if needed when Fluffy started to lift their heads up, sniffing at the air before three pairs of eyes snapped our way, lips pulling back to show their teeth and starting to growl so lowly that I felt the room shaking. "Wha-"
He breathed sharply at the sight of the dog, but I didn't take my eyes off it to see Harry's expression, slowly stepping back and blindly searching for the door handle behind me.
It stood up, growl raising in volume and making me quicken my movement before Harry couldn't help stumbling back quickly and making it bark like mad, which made both of us scream in fright. I finally moved without care about not aggravating it, seeing as the deed was done, and shoved the door open, pulling Harry with me when it lunged at us.
"Close it close it close it close it CLOSE IT!" I shrieked, pushing my weight against the door with Harry's help when one of the heads tried snapping their teeth at us even though we were out, I'm sure the sound of their teeth clicking near our heads would forever haunt me.
We fell against the door when it finally rattled close and I hissed the locking charm at it, hearing the loud clicking sound of the bolt before holding Harry by my side and dragging him away from the shaking door.
"What the fu-" His voice cut off into a wheeze when I pulled him by his hand to the stairs, knowing that the commotion had certainly caught someone's attention and wanting to put as much distance between us and the fucking dog as I could.
I didn't stop dragging him until I was waking up the Fat Lady, hissing the password and barely holding myself from flipping her off when she started to complain about us waking her up.
Harry basically toppled over when I threw him in, legs finally giving out as I dropped to my knees while he turned over to stare up the ceiling in shock.
"Star…" I made a noise from the back of my throat, huffing out breaths and clutching my sweater, trying to slow my heartbeat before I passed out. "Do- Do all your nightly excursions go this way?"
There was a moment of silence before a giggle built up my throat when my eyes found his, and soon I was bent over, my forehead pressed on his stomach while trying to smother my cackles and Harry had his hands pressed over his face, shaking in laughter.
"N-no, it's just you and your amazing Potter luck."
"Ah-h." We spent a few more moments trying to control our noises before inevitably making eye contact and starting over again. Finally calming down, Harry sat up as I dropped back, my knees bruising from the kneeling position and bothering me. The boy shook his head, finally seeming to understand that we were in actual danger. "This school is crazy ."
"You tell me, Harry James."
"Why d'you reckon they're keeping that thing here?" His eyes were electric, like he couldn't wait for another adrenaline rush and I internally groaned at it.
I didn't remember how he reacted to it originally; from the books, Harry seemed mostly tired and done with getting dragged to the plot, though his strong moral compass didn't allow him to sit idly if something wrong was happening.
But I don't remember him being an adrenaline junkie aside from his flying.
"Maybe it's guarding something." He tilted his head at my words before nodding slowly as if trying to make sense of my words.
"You know… Did I ever tell you about the package Hagrid took from Gringotts?" I tried remembering if he had before I agreed and admitted to knowing something I wasn't told.
"Hm, yeah, I think so? Didn't you interrogate poor wee Hagrid about the break-in at Gringotts?" His face darkened in a fluster as I snickered, smirking when he huffed annoyedly but nodded haltingly.
"D'you reckon it has to do with whatever the dog is guarding?" I shrugged, looking at him warily as I stood up, patting my jeans free of dust before extending my hand and helping him up.
"Probably. Why does it matter, though?"
"It doesn't, but aren't you even a little bit curious about what it is?"
"Not really, no." I snorted at his judging eyes, glancing at the clock above the fireplace and seeing that it was way past four. "Look, whatever it is they have that demon keeping safe, I only care about not coming anywhere close to it again. Don't you remember how we almost lost our bloody heads just now?"
Harry rolled his eyes sassily and my lips twitched in a smile, infinitely endeared by his blooming personality as he learned to up his cheek with Blaise, Daphne, and me verbally abusing everyone.
"Yes, I quite remember you screaming your knickers off, thank you-" I wheezed at that, muffling my laugh in my hand as he sighed morosely. "And I didn't say anything about going back to it, just… you know…"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, Harry James."
He smiled at me, eyes glinting in fondness.
"What's with the Harry James?"
"It suits you." I shrugged, peering at him in hesitation before relaxing at his grin widening.
"I like it."
Warmth bloomed on my chest at his beaming smile, and once again I was knocked over with the knowledge of how far I'd go to protect Harry.
"Good, because I wasn't going to stop calling you that, anyways."
"So thoughtful."
"Mhm, always and forever for you, Harry James."
The words followed quiet snickers as we settled in front of the dead fire, exchanging quips under our breaths and knocking shoulders as we watched the sunrise.
Looking down at Harry's smile, I couldn't help mirroring him as I knew he'd be fine.
He had us, after all.
Notes:
So there's that!
Some nice bonding time, a bit of mischief as we find out that Star is not handing well to her mother cutting contact even if she herself doesn't want to admit to it, Harry getting his adrenaline rush with Star and a few bits and pieces I couldn't leave out for the sake of the plot.
No Slytherins this time, sorry!
A few things: This is not a Hermione Bashing fic and I swear she'll calm down after finally coming to blows with Star, but it's pretty in character for her to act that way. This Hermione feels much threatened over her position as the smartest in the room and just in Gryffindor overall, so this is genuinely just her acting out. Besides, look me in the eye and tell me that she wouldn't act this way, especially as Star is getting away with quite a lot while still remaining in the good graces of most teachers and academically overall.
Uhh, again, this is NOT canon-compliant, but as warned a few chapters before, things will start deviating around the second to third book as Star learns to navigate what she knows and how she can mess with it.
What else,,, Oh yeah, something I see a lot is how Star just can't figure out how she's [REDACTED]'s daughter when it's clear for us with all the knowledge we get from her, but I think I made pretty clear that she doesn't see herself as part of the story yet, Lily genuinely feels like she's just warming Hermione's seat, or that nobody had space for her as she wasn't a "canon" character, and despite the liberties I'm taking with Pureblood politics and the change of personality in the characters that interact with her, this fic isn't THAT off the rails in terms of how close to canon the worldbuilding is, so Star really doesn't give much thought to how she fits the parameter of as [REDACTED]'s daughter!fic.
She really doesn't think twice about it, firstly because she has no curiosity about who her father is, and second because despite being mildly annoyed by the hostility of the professors, she REALLY doesn't want to figure out why they don't like her. Star has a blatant disregard for authority, so besides an idle thought here or there, she just comes to the conclusion that it has to do with Marlene and shrugs it off.
That's about it, I think? aksjndaksjnda
Anyways, see you... soon? question mark??????