Chapter 4
I, the very epitome of an irreparably poor Demon, ended up spending the night in the same room as my Contractor, Yuri.
I sat in front of an old wooden door that looked like it would break if I accidentally hit it.
Fitting for the name Yuri—which means glass—the Contractor settled down right under the window.
The Human and the Demon (Human) looked at each other from their respective spots.
The physical distance between the two Contractors was roughly fifteen feet.
The psychological distance was still unknown.
"...."
"...."
A silent race began once again alongside the pitter-patter of the rain. It was a roleplay of delusions and fantasies, staring intently as if observing each other in the silence.
There were many things to be curious about, but neither of us asked.
Because conversation is a great help in getting to know others and growing closer, but abusing it can become poison.
...Truthfully, I just didn't know how to strike up a conversation.
'The weather is quite nice, isn't it?'
'Yuri is a pretty name.'
'What's your favorite food?'
'Do you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend?'
Pathetic. To think that those were the only conversation starters coming to mind in my Head.
A miserable linguistic ability that even a zero-language Demon would scoff at. The realm of a tongue-sword, severing the flow of conversation whenever I open my mouth.
This is me.
The Contractor stared intently at me, as I downgraded myself past a Water Flea to the level of a slipper Bug with high-level self-deprecation.
He or she lightly shattered my Illusion of us being fellow communication-challenged comrades, and naturally asked a question like a female Child sitting next to me at a college drinking party asking about my hobbies.
"Raven. I have a question."
"What is it?"
"What do newborn Demons usually eat? Is it true that they feed on the emotions of the Human Race that accidentally wander into the Demon Realm?"
—Gurgle.
The sound of belly Leather rumbling echoed at the same time as the question. Was it an unconscious question born from hunger?
It was a situation where a normal Human would show a cute reaction like blushing or avoiding eye contact.
As if the emotion of embarrassment had been Substituted with shamelessness, the Contractor simply waited for my answer with pitch-black eyes full of curiosity.
However, even with such expectations, the answer that would come from me, a mere Demon-wannabe, was already set.
"I don't know."
Because I'm a person.
I was Summoned and even formed a Contract, but it is what it is.
"I see."
The Contractor's expression became mysterious.
As if lost in thought, the Contractor bowed their Head, gently stroking their lower jaw with one hand and occasionally touching their small lips with a thumb.
It seemed we had similar habits, so my internal sense of intimacy increased.
As if their thoughts were organized, the Contractor lowered the hand that was resting on their chin, quietly hugged their Knees, and threw me an intense gaze along with a single question.
"Then, what about you, Raven?"
'What a difficult question.'
I haven't put anything called food into my mouth since I was possessed.
No, to be exact, I can't put anything in even if I want to.
The Crow head Mask worn on my Head only has tiny breathing holes, you see.
Even those have dozens of layers of filtration filters stacked under the guise of gas protection, so every time I breathe, my lung sacs ache.
Then why not just take it off, you ask?
Because my past dumbass self locked the fashion slot, so I can't even remove it.
Naturally, breaking it isn't an option either. Since it's a cash shop item, it has infinite durability and indestructible object properties.
Probably even the hardest substance in the World would get a breathing hole if I pecked it with this beak.
In conclusion, the fundamental reason I can't eat food is none other than myself.
I suppose it's the product of a Gamer's efficiency-centered mindset?
The most important thing for Survival is food. But for a Veteran who simply craves slaughter, the process of procuring food was nothing but tedious labor.
So my past self thought.
With hamburger steaks running around everywhere, why not just eat those?
Thinking back now, it was truly a moronic thought, but back then I shouted 'Eureka!' and combined hundreds of Traits to excavate useful ones.
After thousands of Trait experiments, what I discovered was 'Predation,' a Rare Trait with a name that clearly suggested it would eat anything well.
The effect was as simple as the name.
Eat living creatures or Mutants to obtain a special stat called 'Bio-Energy.' That's all.
Thanks to this, I could secure energy to somehow move my body without food, but there was one fatal problem.
"The texture is absolute garbage."
I had to chew and swallow chunks of meat with such shitty texture—tough and squishy—that even a Hyena would avoid it.
And quite a lot of it too.
Oral consumption was damnably inefficient.
The amount to eat was huge. But the character's esophagus was too small.
And above all, it was nauseating.
"...Eating with my mouth. Is really. Not it."
Here comes a paradigm shift.
Then, if not the mouth, can't I eat through somewhere else?
I was a genius.
The best in the world. An irreparable idiot, that is.
To recreate that moronic delusion in reality, I needed Predation, Survival, and Evolution.
I excavated no less than three ultra-Rare Traits that would be called Petroleum-grade anomalies if you obtained just one.
Thanks to driving my mind to exhaustion by cutting back on sleep, I got chewed out a lot at work, but the effects of the Traits were certain.
The insane ultra-Rare Trait trio.
The end of that beautiful trinity harmony was the realization of 'Do you eat food through your asshole?' 'Yep!'
Of course, I don't mean literally eating through the anus, but with effort, it's somehow possible.
Of course, I've never actually done it. Really.
Wait! Then, since I don't need to eat food with my mouth anymore, I can Equip 'that thing' in the Head's empty slot?
A swordsman who suspiciously insists on three swords might Equip a sword in an empty slot.
I, the Demon King of approval needs, purchased the legendary trash Equipment that only the top 0.01% of Players worldwide had Equipped, purely to show off on the community.
The large sum of 300,000 won melted away in an instant, and a gas Mask shaped like a Crow Head dropped from the void with a plop.
[Plague Doctor Mask Prototype Zero]
Effects: Waterproof, Bulletproof, Gas-proof, Food... proof!
A glorious and terrifying symbol of Veterans who went beyond to Ascendants who evaporated into clouds, possessing the moronic effect of being unable to consume food.
Explosive style for efficiency by efficiency, romance overflowing, the desperate struggle of Petroleum residue left on dry land. The end result was the birth of a conditionally immortal Monster that rocks a Plague Doctor cosplay.
However, I don't want to explain this tear-jerking story in tedious detail.
Because I am a noble Demon.
A brief answer to the question derived from such a mindset: 'Then, what the hell do you eat to live?'
"It's a secret."
"Is that so. What a shame."
With the Contractor closing their eyes, the conversation came to an end.
I really am an idiot.
To blow such a golden opportunity to get closer so meaninglessly, I should have kept the conversation going by making something up at least.
The usual repeated Regeneration of regret and self-deprecation. It was such an identical repertoire that it made me sigh out of sheer boredom.
I seriously suspected that this intelligence, lower than a schoolhouse dog with zero capacity for learning, was due to the mass death of brain cells from over triple-digit suicide attempts.
Haa.
Swallowing a sigh inwardly, I resolved, 'Let's do better next time.'
—Pitter-patter.
A cozy room enveloped in dark silence after the candle went out, accompanied by the rain that had begun to fall heavier.
The only light was the remnant of moonlight softly flowing in from the object claiming to be a window.
The Contractor seemed to be getting sleepy, nodding off with their forehead pressed against their Knees.
I wanted to offer a brief 'Good night,' but it seemed too late for today.
'I hope I can say it tomorrow.'
Harboring a small yet incredibly grand wish, I slowly closed my eyes inside the stuffy Mask.
It was quiet.
There were no cut-off screams or intermittent howls.
Just the rhythmic sound of rain and the warm breathing of life blending together to provide comfort and stability.
Although my deformed body no longer strictly needed sleep, it was only polite to close my eyes on a miraculous day like this.
I adjusted my alert level to the minimum.
Then, fatigue and lethargy rushed in rapidly.
The World spun around as if I were drunk.
It was the realization of a simple pleasure, like coming home, cracking open a Beer, and collapsing into sleep. The modest happiness I had always yearned for was right here.
Even though there was no soft bed or warm fireplace.
'This is nice.'
This small space brought me so much peace of mind that my eyes closed on their own.
And for the first time in a very long while, I fell asleep looking forward to tomorrow.
Earnestly praying that a ray of dawn would finally find its way into my bleak life.
***
A cramped and gloomy room where moonlight flowed down the red walls.
The eyes of the small figure curled up like a Shrimp under the window gently opened.
At the end of that gaze was an ominously black Crow-headed Phantom, standing completely motionless like a stone statue with crossed arms leaning against the door.
A Demon full of secrets who had come to her like a miracle.
People usually think that the Contractor takes the initiative to call a Demon, but the truth is the exact opposite.
Demons are pure and free souls themselves.
They aren't hunting dogs that eagerly tag along just because someone calls them. They're actually closer to willful wild Cats.
That was why it was so surprising.
To think he would come to a penniless orphan whose only possession was a single 'Book of Contracts'.
Considering that it was extremely rare for even top Adventurers who entered Dungeons and received the Goddess's Blessing to succeed in a Demon Contract, this was highly unprecedented.
Then, why on earth.
'Why did you reach out your hand to an insignificant failure like me?'
Raven.
I want to know you a little more.
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