Chapter 7:
"So, remind me one more time... why did we change the plan overnight?" Oliver asked, with clear confusion.
Naruto had been very, very clear about his absolute refusal to get involved with Rias until reality, like a bucket of cold water, hit her pretty, round backside... of course, with many colorful details and more vivid and exaggerated descriptions thrown in.
However, now they were standing in front of the Kuoh Academy Occult Research Club building, which Rias had claimed as her base of operations. The reason? Naruto woke up that morning, dragged her out of bed, and told her there was a change of plans. Apparently, overnight, Alice had explained a few things to him, and now they had to save his sister from her "stupidity."
Whether he was referring to Rias's stupidity or his own, that was something the golden-haired elf was not entirely clear about yet.
"Because, my dear Oliver, I completely forgot that I have to maintain my public image, given that there are social and political repercussions," Naruto admitted. He had forgotten that, as a figure of high social value to the Underworld, he couldn't just barge in like an idiot to save his sister from her unwanted engagement to Riser in the middle of the party.
Doing so would be social suicide. Firstly, it would spit in the face of Lord Phoenix; secondly, it would ruin his image by crashing such an important high-society event. Finally, humiliating Riser during the engagement, while incredibly funny, wouldn't be good for his social status, as it would make him look like a clown seeking to humiliate a prominent family just because he considered their third son unworthy of marrying his little sister.
Naruto had spent almost a damn decade cultivating his public image to throw it away, especially because he loved getting away with things he shouldn't be able to do just for being the Underworld's "golden boy."
"That makes sense," Oliver said, nodding. Honestly, she hadn't thought about it from that perspective. Certainly, she enjoyed as much as he did being able to get away with things she normally wouldn't be allowed to do, as a mere reincarnated, just because her master was the "golden boy" of the Underworld. "So, why have we been here for two hours?" she asked, not understanding why they hadn't gone in as soon as they arrived.
"Drama," Naruto said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. After all, it was. Yes, he could have entered before Raiser arrived, put him in his place and such... but that wouldn't be fun.
Without saying anything else, Oliver simply nodded. She stared at him for a couple of seconds until, finally, she nodded her head, letting him know that they could go in now.
Immediately after, the elf simply brushed the door latch, revealing a bright red magic circle with several rings that spread throughout the building. Fortunately, Naruto had declared that Natsume, a prominent author from the human world, would be giving away autographs and signed copies of her book during the two hours they were unoccupied, so there were no students or teachers at the school who could see what was, without a doubt, the worst possible security system.
"It seems I'll have to teach her to put up better security systems... What kind of idiot would use one that activates upon touching the door and is so visible?" Naruto complained very, very audibly.
"What do we do now, sir?" Oliver asked.
In response, Naruto simply punched the center of his sister's security seal, and it fell to the floor as if it were a piece of glass.
"We go in... I have a little sister I definitely need to help," Naruto said before entering.
He walked in as if he owned the place, even though he had just effortlessly knocked down one of the Underworld's best security systems. Although, in Oliver's opinion, that last point was totally debatable given the ease with which her master had destroyed it.
Shortly after, she simply entered with her master, ignoring that the occult research club building was defenseless at that moment. Since she had never been there, she moved disoriented until they finally reached what must undoubtedly be her sister's main hall, marked by two beautifully large, elaborately carved double doors."
"How should we enter?" Naruto asked, looking at the door with a smile.
However, before he could devise a spectacular entrance to show off his ability to enter at will, an intense heat wave reached them. An unmistakable golden fire was seeping from under the door, causing Oliver to visibly pale and take a couple of steps back, realizing that the show was over: Naruto was furious.
And, as always when he was angry, all social caution vanished. Before he could regret it, he hit the heavy clubroom doors with such force that he tore them from their hinges, causing them to fall to the floor and attracting the attention of everyone present.
This managed to calm Raizer's volatile and, therefore, provocative temper a bit. Although Grayfia was someone who wouldn't intervene unless a certainly ambiguous and ill-defined line was crossed, the situation was very different with Naruto. Raizer, while not the smartest of devils, was cunning enough to know that if he crossed a boundary, Naruto would destroy him not only physically, but also socially. As the Underworld's "golden boy," people listened to him. Furthermore, Naruto was so meticulous about hiding his "dirty laundry" that he would expose it himself if necessary, and yet, the few scandals he got involved in never managed to bring him down.
Therefore, Naruto was a particularly difficult opponent against whom Raizer, for the moment, could do nothing if he wanted to keep his physical health intact.
"Wow... I expected you to be a little more cautious at this meeting, Raizer," Naruto said, standing up completely and towering over Raizer thanks to his considerable height. "On the other hand... you've never been the most cautious person, have you?" he said, referring of course to the countless times the complete imbecile had boasted that Rias would be his "bitch" and other similar bravado, said in front of the high nobility, the clan heirs, and basically, digging his own social grave. This had reached such a point that even Lord Phenex had tried to renegotiate the alliance treaty several times, only to be blocked by Zekram at every turn. He didn't know the reasons, but, to be honest, he didn't care much.
"Brother... weren't you supposed to have..." Rias tried to ask, visibly confused. As far as she knew, Naruto had kidnapped Alice in the middle of a meeting with other important Lords and now she imagined they were immersed in a romantic and sexual adventure around the world.
"Yeah... we'll talk about that later," Naruto said, interrupting Rias. He didn't need to be reminded that he now essentially had to deal with a cousin. His father had confirmed that old Zekram had strictly forbidden Alice from stepping foot on any Bael territory until she returned pregnant. Given the slow reproductive rate of devils, this could take years, or even centuries; after all, his own parents had been married for thousands of years and Sirzechs was almost a thousand years older than the twins.
"But I thought..." Rias tried to say something else, only for Naruto to give her a condescending pat on the head to silence her.
"We'll talk later," despite the jovial and sing-song tone with which he expressed it, the message for Rias was unequivocal: it was something he definitely wouldn't discuss with an audience present.
Despite everything, the action and the treatment she received from her twin made her blush with embarrassment and she began to babble things about not liking to be treated like a child or a pet. However, due to the embarrassment, her words were barely intelligible murmurs, so Naruto preferred not to try to decipher them... that was Natsume's job, or Evelyn's when she was particularly bored.
"Oh, by the way, I'll send you the bill for all the books I had to give to the school to make my dramatic entrance. Oh, and I broke your security seal, you don't mind, do you?" he said brazenly, adding the last part as an afterthought and ignoring the slight twitch in Grayfia's eye.
Rias snapped out of her shock: "You did what? How the hell had he broken her security system if it was the best on the market?"
"I knew it, you're the best little sister in the world!" exclaimed Naruto, as if Rias had said she didn't care.
After this, he decided that bothering Rias could wait, as at that moment he had much more important matters to attend to. Although Riser certainly didn't want trouble with him, Naruto knew perfectly well what buttons to push to piss off the Phenex, and of course he would push them all at the same time, even repeatedly if necessary.
"So... did I come at a bad time?" he asked again, completely ignoring Riser.
"You..." the aforementioned Phenex tried to say, his tone revealing a struggle to contain the mounting anger towards the most goddamn exasperating devil he had ever met. "What are you doing here?" he practically growled.
"Oh, you know, a visit to my little sister... flirting with Akeno, persuading Koneko to go to therapy... ignoring Kiba and convincing Gasper that I can turn him into a girl... the usual," Naruto replied, holding up a finger for each activity mentioned, tilting his head to dodge the pocky Koneko had thrown at him, while the vein in his sister-in-law's temple visibly grew.
"You are not going to perform gender reassignment surgery on Gasper," Rias declared flatly, exasperated. Damn it, Gasper didn't want to be a girl, he just liked cross-dressing!
"Look at all the things I have to deal with... I just want to be a good big brother and she just won't let me," he told Riser, dramatizing almost every part of the second half of his statement as if he were truly suffering.
"You crashed an important meeting, you act like I don't exist, you behave like a jerk, and to top it all off, you mock me! Who the hell do you think you are?" Riser shouted at Naruto, who looked back at him unperturbed with his best "poker face" for an instant.
"Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist," Naruto replied, maintaining his impassive expression. "Oh, and Rias's big brother, therefore I can visit her whenever I feel like it."
"You stole that from The Avengers," Riser retorted.
"Of course not," Naruto said with a tone of exaggerated indignation. "I didn't steal Rias from Stark."
"You damn insolent jerk!" Riser snapped. "Do you think you can mock me like that, someone with the power of the Phenex clan?"
"It's just fire and regeneration. Therefore, I can treat you like a piñata all the time I want... just without the candy part," Naruto said, sounding completely serious in the last part and glaring at Riser, almost as if it were a total sacrilege that hitting him wouldn't make sweets spill out of his mouth.
Both Riser and Rias were completely stunned by the declaration, albeit for radically different reasons. Riser couldn't believe that the underworld's 'golden boy' had just discredited the most crucial power of the Phenex as if it were insignificant. As for Rias... she simply couldn't assimilate that her brother, the one she used to play with as a child, had the audacity—or stupidity—to treat the monster of her nightmares with such calmness and as if he had no value.
"Hey, bastard!" someone shouted.
Naruto turned to find a brown-haired teenager looking at him with an intensity that suggested a desire to destroy him. This struck him as incredibly funny, considering Oliver would probably tear him to shreds in seconds if he tried anything.
"My parents have been happily married since long before I was born," Naruto said, for once, without any mockery.
"Don't mess with me, bastard. Who are you? Why are you mocking Buchou like that?"
"First, we're speaking Spanish, idiot. Don't use Japanese terms, they don't make you look more 'cool'," Naruto replied, ignoring the fact that they were in Japan and, therefore, the use of Japanese terms was natural. "Second... I'm her big brother. Part of my job is to annoy her, plus it's fun."
"He knows we're in Japan, right?" Asia whispered to Koneko, who just shrugged. With her king's brother, it was hard to discern whether he was serious or just being an idiot.
"Stop..." and before Issei could commit an imprudence that would probably end with Naruto tearing him to shreds (or worse, with Oliver and Naruto's team clamoring for his blood), Naruto himself decided to intervene. With a simple movement of a finger, he let a considerable portion of his power emanate from his body, which caused the wooden floor beneath their feet to crack and Issei to freeze in his tracks.
"You know... you shouldn't get involved in matters you don't understand, kid... you're not the protagonist of a generic ecchi, this is real life," Naruto said in his most serious tone.
Koneko noticed that they were now dealing with the Naruto who was really there for serious matters, and not the one who popped up occasionally just to annoy them.
"Little sister... I suggest you discipline him a little more. You know not everyone is as patient as I am."
"He's new," Rias excused herself, nervous.
This was the reason she hadn't wanted to introduce Issei to her family so soon. She didn't want her father or, Lucifer forbid, her mother, to end up killing him if he tried to overstep or said any of his barbaric remarks in front of them. After all, even though they loved her and saw her peerage as part of the family, they were still Devil Lords and had to maintain a public image.
"It's no excuse... as a daughter of the Gremory Clan, you know very well that there are consequences for doing things wrong," Naruto said seriously, causing Rias to visibly flinch. After all, her brother was living proof that actions, no matter how well-intentioned, could have horrible consequences.
"I can't believe for once we agree on something," Riser commented, making Naruto feel incredibly dirty upon realizing that, in fact, he and Riser coincided in their stance regarding Issei's attitude. Given that the rest of the misogynistic idiot's peerage was there, it was probably a show of power towards Issei, as Rias was astute enough not to actively provoke Riser.
"I'm going to need a bath after this," he thought to himself. Grayfia smiled at Naruto's discomfort; in the opinion of the strongest queen, it was only fair that he suffered a little after the spectacle he had put on.
"Can we please get back to the important topic?" he asked, recovering his more jovial attitude. With Issei unconscious and himself frankly disgusted by having to agree with Riser, he just wanted to get it all over with to go home and, hopefully, have the whole matter out of his mind by tomorrow.
"Was there an important matter?" Akeno asked with genuine confusion... Since Naruto's arrival, she believed that anything important about the engagement between Rias and Riser had been ruined.
"Of course there was!" Naruto said seriously. "I have to convince Gasper to let me turn him into a girl."
With that, Naruto's playful and insolent side returned, and Akeno couldn't help but laugh. She knew Naruto was acting this way to lighten the mood and avoid overwhelming Rias more than she already was, but it was still funny.
"Besides, I have new tricks to teach them," he added.
Although he knew this would anger Riser, and probably get Ravel into trouble for teaching him, he couldn't help but provoke the Phenex's pride a little more. He lit his fist with an unmistakable golden fire that slowly began to be tinged with the color of the Power of Destruction.
"I managed to find a way to mix our bloodlines... you no longer have to marry the jerk," he said with total naturalness... in the most exaggerated and theatrical way possible.
"You almost died doing it," Oliver reminded him. After all, he had had to mix several types of magic just to replicate the golden fire of the Phenex clan and many more to prevent it from exploding while trying to infuse it with the Power of Destruction.
"You... you... you can use the power of my clan! And you dared to profane it, I'll kill you, you insolent bastard!" Riser shouted, starting to radiate a completely abnormal amount of fire that heated up the room.
"It's just fire and regeneration applied simultaneously in the same spell with a perfect balance... anyone could do it if they took the trouble," Naruto said as he dispersed his magic. Honestly, it wasn't even as good as the original magic, but it served to annoy Riser, which was the main goal.
Riser, completely enraged by Naruto's second slight in ten minutes, could only splutter a couple of times, unable to contain himself anymore. However, he refrained from attacking him directly; he was aware of the red-haired devil's physical superiority and knew that hitting the "golden boy" for performing another of his "magical miracles" would completely ruin his reputation.
Instead, Riser snapped his fingers. Mira, one of his most devoted pawns and least attached to her own life, lunged forward with her staff, with the full intention of hitting Naruto. However, before she could reach him, Oliver intervened, knocking her to the ground with a single knee to the abdomen.
With this, she reminded Riser that Naruto was not alone. The cold look in the elf's eyes made the Phenex understand that he had fallen for the game Naruto had orchestrated from the beginning.
"So you did remember that," Rias asked, finally recalling the promise they made so many years ago.
"I never forgot it," Naruto said as he loudly cracked his knuckles. "Originally I wanted you to face reality head-on, but I forgot that there are political repercussions that even my status as a golden boy and celebrity can't save me from."
"What?" Rias asked, not fully grasping what her brother was trying to tell her.
"You're spoiled, you've let your growth stagnate... Look, playing schoolgirl is a nice thing and I'm not going to blame you for it, but you carry a great weight on your shoulders. You are not just a teenager, you are a Gremory, and your actions affect the family, me, Sirzechs and, above all, dad," Naruto told her, dropping onto the couch as if he were the absolute owner of the place.
Once again, Rias could only lower her head, embarrassed.
"But you're still my sister and I love you too much to let you suffer," he admitted openly, softening his tone, which made Rias raise her head and look him directly in the eyes.
"As much as I love you and wish that reality would hit you so you can mature, realizing that if I don't rescue you now, I won't be able to do it later, made me see that despite how much I've grown, I'm still the same reckless fool as always," he said, discreetly looking at Riser. "And thanks to our cousin who made me see reason, I have decided that if I am going to risk my golden boy status to save your cute butt, I must do it the right way."
"Hahahaha," Riser, of course, couldn't help but laugh at his future brother-in-law for the way he was talking. "You... risk everything you've built just to save your sister?"
"Empires fall, and new ones take their place... I rose once, I can do it again. Therefore, I, Naruto Gremory, as the eldest son of the clan and heir to the Gremory House, declare that Riser Phenex is not fit to marry a daughter of the Gremory clan," Naruto declared in an energetic voice.
"What?" Riser asked, confused and at the same time furious. "What do you hope to achieve with that statement? You are not your father, you cannot stop the wedding just with that, you don't have the power to do it."
"With what arguments?" Grayfia asked, which caused astonished looks from Riser and Rias. The latter was more surprised because she did not expect Grayfia to actually help her brother.
"Among his four brothers, Riser is the weakest. Therefore, he will only lead to weak offspring or an early widowhood for Rias," Naruto said, struggling not to vomit at the thought of Rias marrying Riser. But it was necessary; it was the only argument that he and Alice could find to activate his right to duel as the clan heir, and it had taken them almost two full days to find it.
"Those are more than valid reasons... Son of the Phenex clan, Riser Phenex, do you wish to present arguments to refute that statement?" Grayfia asked.
"Of course I do!" Riser growled, completely furious.
"How do you propose to refute these claims?" she asked again.
She knew very well that Riser lacked arguments, as he had fallen from the top of the Rating Games since Naruto and Roygun modified the rules of the rating games. Therefore, he had no real reason to claim he was strong.
"A Rating Game, of course... nobility against nobility," Riser said.
Unbeknownst to him, this caused Naruto to smile visibly. Manipulating idiots was so easy.
"Very well, the Rating Game will be in a week. Now, please, stop provoking each other," Grayfia said, directing her gaze at Naruto, aware that, although Riser did not really have a way to upset him, the heir of the Gremory clan was an expert at exasperating people, to the point that some thought he did it purely for sport.
"Let's see how much the golden boy shines when we pressure him," Riser said before disappearing along with all his peerage, mainly because he knew that in Naruto the ideas of "stop provoking" and "existing" were mutually exclusive.
"Son of a bitch... you took away my right to the last word," Naruto complained. He didn't like being the last to receive an insult.
"It doesn't seem appropriate for the heir of the Gremory clan to use that kind of language against another noble," Grayfia said before disappearing.
She had to inform Sirzechs about how the meeting unfolded and, with any luck, prevent her younger brother's first rating game from becoming a media event. Being honest with herself, she didn't have much hope of achieving the latter.
"Why does everyone today seem determined not to let me have the last word?" Naruto asked Oliver, earning only a shrug from his queen.
"You can mess with my senpai," Koneko offered. Honestly, she thought that the more distracted her king's older brother was, the better it would be for her, since then he wouldn't try to convince her to go to therapy. She was perfectly happy just the way she was.
"Pass... I have better things to do," Naruto replied, staring directly at Rias. "Leave us alone... I have a lot to talk about with my sister."
Following this order, Akeno and the rest of Rias's group looked at their king, who nodded to confirm that they should follow her brother's instruction. Without wasting time, one by one they began to withdraw, although Koneko had to carry an unconscious Issei over her shoulder.
"This order included you, Oliver... Find Natsume; the poor girl is probably about to explode. Take her home," he ordered his queen this time, who only nodded, aware that Naruto had a lot to talk about with his sister.
End of chapter.