[Hyde POV]
Back at the Forman's basement. I smoked while in the circle with a new group of people.
Jackie, Laurie, and Donna.
"Man, I've got no idea about what's gotten into Jackie."
I imitated her mockingly. "Steven, let's hang out. Steven, let's go to the mall."
I grimaced and said, "My life's a living hell, you know."
Jackie laughed hard, throwing her head back exaggeratedly. "STEVEN! You're hilarious!"
She turned to everyone and said, "You know, Steven and I tease each other. That's how I know we're in love."
Donna interjected, face full of anger, "You know what, I love showing my butt! I don't care what Eric says! I like to show it and I like to shake it!"
Laurie twirled her hair and said, "Donna, I can totally respect that. Just be careful though or they'll call you a home wrecker. I can count the number of homes I've wrecked on one hand."
I laughed, "Don't worry ladies, cause no-one is going to label you here. If you guys want to take off some clothes and shake some stuff, feel free." I turned to Jackie and said seriously. "Not you."
Jackie turned to Laurie and said, " I wouldn't call you a home wrecker Laurie. No, I'd call you a slut. And a home wrecker."
Donna stood up, shaking her butt sideways. "Shake shake shake, shake shake shake! Shake your booty!" She sang as she shook her money maker.
"Whoo rock it girl!" Laurie shook her boobs.
I smiled, "Yeah, that's good stuff!"
Donna kept twerking, until Bob came to the basement.
"Donna. What are you doing?" He asked, horrified.
"Dad!" Donna was horrified. "What– What are you doing here?"
"I saw the yearbook thing. You're in a lot of trouble young lady." Bob said angrily.
"Dad!" Donna was stupified. "Who told you?!"
"That little foreign friend of yours showed me the yearbook." Bob said angrily. "You're grounded!"
"What– FEZ!" Donna fumed angrily.
I laughed and sang, "Shake shake shake. Shake your booty."
"Shut up HYDE!" Donna snapped at me before storming to go find Fez.
I laughed and said, "Bob's really mad. He didn't even see what I'm holding." I picked up the blunt and smoked it again.
"He's not going to be mad for long." Laurie laughed. "Donna just has to pretend to be his little girl for a while. Then, she's golden."
"Laurie. Why don't you take over for Donna and shake your booty too?" I said mischievously.
She grimaced and said, "Not for you." She stood up and left.
…
Apparently Timmy, the weird kid, recognized Donna's butt and told everyone about it at the Hub.
"DONNA SHOWED HER ASS! DONNA SHOWED HER ASS!" He stood on top of a chair and chanted.
Donna was laughed at, and Eric's worst nightmare came true.
I went to the Hub to look for Timmy afterward.
I cornered him up in the alley and said, "Now. What are you supposed to say if people ask you if it's really Donna's butt?"
Timmy said fearfully. "It's not her butt. I'm just making it all up."
"Good. If I hear you're telling people about it, I'll be sure to do a lot worse than this. You can go now."
He ran for his life. The reason he knew about it was he saw Donna mooning at the pep rally. He was a witness. Now, I had silenced the witness.
I smoked a cigarette and went back to the Hub. It was almost sunset now. I spent the entire day trying to avoid Jackie. Finally, I managed to get some alone time.
Fez and Kelso played the foosball game while I was reading a comic book.
"You lose again cracker! Why don't you go home and cry to your big white momma?" Fez taunted the hippie he was playing with.
Leo said seriously, "Well first of all dude, I think I'm Chinese. And second of all, let me see you put your money where your mouth is." He put 20 bucks on the table.
Kelso and Fez were taken aback. Kelso said, "I don't know…twenty bucks…I'm gonna have to dip into my babysitting money.."
Fez and Leo looked at him with disbelief.
"I mean my drag racing money!" Kelso took out his cash and put it on the table.
"Time to lose little white girls!" Fez taunted Leo again.
Leo turned the plastic football player and scored the ball easily.
"SCORE! Yeah I just remembered man, I'm really good at this game." Leo laughed.
Both Fez and Kelso froze in disbelief.
Jackie came into the restaurant and sat in front of me quickly.
"Ohhh Steven! I'm so glad you're here."
"Jackie, please. I'm right in the middle of Smokey and the Band-Aid okay?" I grimaced.
"Steven. You can't avoid me forever." Jackie said seriously.
I sighed and put the book down. "Okay. Look. Do I think you're hot? Yes, you're really pretty."
She grinned excitedly.
"Can I look past your flaws, such as your rudeness and obnoxious behavior? I can, because you're really pretty." I said.
Her smile froze for a bit before it got wide again.
"So, what seems to be the problem?" She asked, touching my hand affectionately.
I pulled back my hand and gave her a warning with my finger. Pointing at her before slithering my throat.
She giggled and said, "Why are you so adamant to go against this?"
"Because it's unnatural." I said flatly. "And, most importantly…" I turned to Kelso and said, "He's still madly in love with you."
"He cheated on me." Jackie replied angrily. "And he's dating Laurie!"
"I know that." I shook my head slightly. "But can you honestly say that you still have no feelings for him? No anger or jealousy bubbling up when you saw him with Laurie?"
Jackie went silent for a while.
"See." I said as a matter of factly. "You two have a very… I want to say dependent, but I'm going with toxic. You two have a very toxic relationship. I'm not going to get in the middle of that. Not until you two are truly done with each other."
"Hmm. I accept your decision, but now, I'm going to tell you my decision. I'm going to keep seducing you until you break."
She stood up and left.
"God damn it." I cursed slightly.
…
-TV-
Eric was playing basketball in his driveway when Donna walked to him. "Oh my God, call Walter Cronkite, my girlfriend has her pants on." He said sarcastically.
"Okay, you're behaving like the biggest baby. What is your problem?" Donna asked angrily.
"What's my...my problem is, it's your...butt. It's our butt, it's my butt." Eric stammered with frustration.
"Eric, it's my butt. And when I showed it, it was funny. And you should be glad you have a girlfriend who is cool enough to moon." She held the basketball and said teasingly.
"Well, yeah okay, I mean you're right." He agreed instantly. "But you know what, once the jocks and the guys with the Firebirds see it, you know, they're just gonna totally want you."
"Oh no, with my weak little girlie mind I'll go too." Donna said exaggeratedly. "You're such a bone-head."
"Yeah I know. Okay. It's great. But you know, in the future, would it kill you just to have a smidgen of modesty?" Eric said seriously.
Donna burst into laughter.
"What? What is so funny?" Eric asked, startled.
"You're a prude!" Donna laughed.
" I am not!"
"Yes! You're uptight like a little pilgrim."
"Oh yeah?!" Eric felt challenged.
"Yeah!" Donna kept laughing.
Midge and Bob were saying goodbye to Kitty and Red at the sliding door.
Bob said, "In the end, I'm glad my Donna's with your Eric. At least I know Eric is not a degenerate."
As he turned, he saw Eric with his pants down, mooning Donna with his pasty white ass.
"Who is the prude now?! My ass is swinging baby! Whooohooo!!"
Donna's entire body shook from laughter.
Mrs Forman called to him with a horrified voice, " Eric?!"
Eric bent down and looked through his leg, seeing the parents upside down.
"Oh. Hi Mom!" Eric greeted casually.
Donna fell to the floor laughing. Bob fumed in anger. Red held Bob's shoulder and said, "So,Bob, you wanna go ahead and cancel next week's game buddy?"
–Tv end–
I went to the Autoshop after hanging out at the Hub. I got a call that an important guest had come there.
"Bruce?" I was surprised when I saw the important 'guest'.
Bruce guffawed and said, "Just look at your face. You're really disappointed."
"I thought a football player had come. So yeah, I'm pretty disappointed. I brought my autograph book for nothing." I said casually, shook Bruce's hand and sat in front of him at the lounge area couch.
"Are you here to check up on your car?" I asked him.
"Not really. I already know you're going to do a great job there. I came here for something else."
He pulled up a cigar and offered me one.
I took it casually and said, "We're not supposed to smoke here. So just bite it without lighting it up."
Bruce laughed and said, "Sorry. Forgot about that rule."
He took his cigar from his mouth and held it. "I'm here because I heard from Patty you're making a movie?"
"Yeah. A simple one though." I replied while crossing my legs.
Bruce's eyes flickered for a bit and he said, "You know about my dream."
"You want a movie you finance to be really successful at the box office." I nodded slightly.
"Yeah. That. I've been investing for almost a decade. I haven't seen any returns." he sighed.
"Wait. A decade? I thought it's 4 years." I was surprised.
"Of course I toned it down to not let people see how pathetic I am." He said angrily.
He sighed and said, "I need a win. So I invested in Shannon's movie. But… Patty said that will also be a disappointment."
I listened intently and checked something on the internet.
"I want to invest in your movies. After this one. I understand you have money to make this one yourself, but if you need to make it bigger–"
"Stop. Bruce." I interjected.
"You don't want to, huh?" He flopped his head down disappointedly.
"Not that." I grimaced at him. "I actually have a couple of suggestions about the movies you can finance. But, you promise you'll let me finance it partially. I don't have a lot of money, so we can share the risk together."
Bruce's eyes lit up. "Wait. Really? Did you have any internal information?"
"Yes." I said with a grin. To be exact, it was boxofficemojo.com.
Bruce grinned, but he shook his head suddenly and said, "Right. I can trust you. Because I can trust you, can I ask something? What would you do if you're me?"
I thought about it and said, "I wouldn't just finance the movies."
"What other things will you do?" He was curious.
"First. I'll buy a distribution company." I thought about my earlier plans. If I had a lot of money, I'd already have done this.
"Distribution?" Bruce was intrigued.
"Yes."
Halloween, Evil Dead Rise, Dawn of the Dead, Mad Max, were all produced outside of the big six studios.
Halloween → $10M–$25M profit
Mad Max → $8M–$18M
Dawn of the Dead→ $10M–$20M
Evil Dead→ $5M–$15M
If I planned it right, I could make 50-80 million in less than 2 million dollars investments in just two years.
The company could buy the distribution rights for that, even if the company couldn't buy the rights entirely. That would still make a lot of money for the distribution company.
The company could be Miramax before Miramax even started.
I talked to Bruce about the distribution company for a while. He was quite open to that idea.
"American International Pictures?" Bruce's eyes lit up.
"Yes." I nodded. "They are going bankrupt. Maybe they are holding on for two more years. You can swoop in, get their library and pipeline for under 20 million. Maybe less if you lowball them."
Bruce wrote it down immediately.
"Secondly, is VHS distribution."
I told Bruce about the future Blockbuster Videos business model and how important VHS would be in the 80s.
He was excited to do that too.
"By the way, this is both great. But I can't shake the feeling that something is off." Bruce said suddenly.
"Ah. The movies." He thought about it for a bit before exclaiming. "My dream is to invest in movies, not distribute movies."
I smiled and said, "Why don't you give me the tapes for Shannon's movie? I can take a look at it. See if I can edit it to give you your money back?"
He grinned and stood up immediately. Then, he reached his hand behind the couch.
I was pretty surprised when I saw it.
"You already brought the tapes?" I said with disbelief.
"Yes!" He cackled. "There is the first cut, and the raw films that didn't make it. There's no scoring yet."
"Okay." I grabbed the tapes from him casually. "Come back in two weeks."
"That's fast." Bruce was surprised. "Patty told me post production will take around 3 months."
"That's for big studios. Since they are a conglomerate, they have a lot of red tape." I lied casually. "What about the director of the movie?"
"He disowned the movie after a disagreement with the producer." Bruce sighed. "This is a copy of the film, so you can go crazy with it."
I nodded and waved goodbye to the man.
"Now, what should I do with this?" I was stunned as I saw the 50,000 square feet of tapes in front of me.
…
I was going back home when I suddenly heard Jackie calling for me. It was just beside my auto factory, next to where I was parking my car.
Some kids love to graffiti the walls there, so it looked pretty sketchy.
"Hey Hyde." Jackie walked to me, holding something behind her back.
"Come on. Just give me a break will ya?" I was frustrated.
"Well. I told you I'm going to seduce you. So here, take a look." She held out a paper bag.
"What's that?" I asked curiously.
"I know you love bad girls. So I decided to become one." She said seriously.
I peeked inside and saw that it was marijuana.
"Jackie." I looked at her with disbelief.
"That's right. I bought it. In the ghetto." She said seriously.
I grimaced in confusion. "Jackie. There's no ghetto here. There's like that one house that needs to be painted."
"Okay fine, I bought it from my housekeeper. Whatever." She said dodging.
"So what are you saying? You wanna be like a burn-out now?" I asked with a serious tone.
"No, no! Hyde, I just wanna be with you okay? I think you're one of the coolest, sweetest guys I've ever met."
"No you don't." I said casually as I hid the paper bag in my pocket. "Jackie. I hate this sort of thing the most. Changing yourself for a guy."
"Then tell me what am I supposed to do?!" She shouted.
Suddenly, a tough voice cut through our voices. "Is there a problem here?" A police officer walked towards us.
Jackie froze in shock and said suddenly, "There's nothing in the–"
I grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards me. Then, I locked lips with her to prevent her from saying another word.
She was startled at first and began to wrap her arms around my neck.
"Hey. Stop that." The policeman was startled.
We made out even deeper.
"I'm serious." He said sternly again.
We ignored him and made it even hotter.
"Alright– Alright, that's it." He separated the both of us and said, "Go get a room or something, or I'll arrest you for indecent exposure."
"Thanks." I grabbed Jackie's hand and led her to my car.
As we closed the door, she said, "Oh my god. That's so close. My heart is palpitating like crazy."
"Idiot. Why in the world would you mention the paper bag?" I scolded her.
She laughed and leaned in to kiss me even more. But I stopped her and said, "Jackie. Just… give up. We're not meant to be together."
"I won't give up! Ever!" She said firmly.
…
Back at the basement. Everyone was hanging out.
"So you tried to run, with pants around your ankles?" I snickered as I heard Eric's story being told by Donna.
Donna called Eric a prude, in which Eric responded by mooning Donna. Red and Kitty were making up with Bob and Midge.
The parents were clearing the air about Eric and Donna having sex. The dads were uncomfortable and decided to steer away from the conversation completely.
Bob saw Eric's ass as he was going out of the Forman's sliding door. He fumed and chased Eric.
"Oh my god. That's pathetic." Jackie laughed at Eric and placed the rubber band on the watermelon.
Kelso laughed and said, "Forman, what you should do next time, is to take the pants off completely." He added another band to the watermelon.
"Shut up Micheal." Jackie scolded him.
"Why are you being so bitchy at me for? Hyde's the one who rejected you." Kelso snapped back.
"Yes! Because he's your best friend! If you're not here, we'll already be together." Jackie said angrily.
I turned to Kelso and said, "Thank you for that man." I leaned forwards and added another band to the watermelon.
"No problem man." Kelso laughed. Jackie gasped, offended.
Eric laughed and said, "Man. When will this crack?"
Fez snickered and said, "I want to make a joke about buttcrack and the watermelon, but Eric already has cracked his own butt. Ay, that doesn't sound good."
I chortled madly at Fez. The watermelon suddenly burst open and everyone flinched.
Then, we reached for the melon and began eating it.
The final episode of season 2 ended just like that.
[Episode 27: Moon Over Point Place.
Old Rating: 7.8
New Rating: 7.7.
Owed rating: 0.1
The Internet system will be shut down for one day.]
'Fuck.' I cursed inwardly.
I checked the yearbook while everyone was eating the watermelon. Donna's butt on the picture began disappearing.
'Like I expected, this is just for the sake of the plot.'
It was honestly a relief. The book might get recalled, she could be suspended, and her family would be the subject of gossip around town.
Thankfully, everything has gone back to normal now.
Except for Jackie who was still looking at me with glittery eyes.
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