From birth, God endows you with a skill, usually to do with your parents' career or your interests. A priest came to my village and appraised all the children, something that usually happens around the age of 13. He looked unimpressed, coming to a random village in the middle of nowhere. But after appraising all the children, his eyes turned greedy.
"Hero, Paladin, Ancient Warrior, Saint, Saintess…" Then he got to me. All the kids before beamed with excitement; getting such a strong class, a high position was assured to them. Foolishly, I thought I'd be no different. Until the priest frowned.
"Couch-potato?" What's a couch? And what do potatoes have to do with it?
It was an unheard-of class, but judging from the name, it had something to do with farming.
After the priest appraised all the rest of the kids, who also had high-level classes. The priest pleaded with their parents to take them to the royal capital to train them up; the kids nodded fervently. The thought of being heroes is fresh in their minds.
Surprisingly, the parents said yes. That was the beginning of the most successful hero party. I was there, watching grumpily while my dad snickered and patted me on the back. "It's okay, son… pfft, not everybody can be special."
Stupid old man, I'll put potatoes in your pillow.
Like clockwork, the priest left the village with a smile so wide it seemed like his face would rip. A carriage full of shiny-looking children behind him. And leaving only the old people, me, and my parents.
We had lunch; my dad teased me while mother glared at him from the side.
I lay on my bed after thinking. When you're given your given access to the 'system.' which allows you to see your attributes in numbers. Of course, I had low expectations, but I was curious.
It was a well-known fact how to activate it.
"Status!" I yelled, because I thought I had to.
[ Mallory Calvin
Class- Couch Potato
Skills- [I have to catch up] [Did I miss anything?] [Indent] [Totally looking for a job]
]
Strange… where are the stats. Usually you'd have strength, mana, speed… stuff like that? And four skills, they seem pretty boring though.
Shrugging, I think to myself that I want to see more of [I have to catch up]
And a window appears.
[I have to catch up]
When you touch a plot relevant character, you can get a brief overview of what has happened to them, you will experience their past as if it was you.
Plot?
Then, [Did I miss anything?]
Whenever a plot event happens you will be alerted and know the general direction and what you need to do to solve or worsen it.
[Indent…]
Leave larger impressions on people, even for small things.
That one seemed useful.
Lastly, I thought.
[Totally looking for a job]
You can use a weaker version of any class skill if you can convince anybody you have it in the first place.
Now that one made him shoot up, he immediately rushed to his parents' room. His dad was grumbling on the side after being scolded. "Mom, I'm a really talented mage!" Then I turned my palm upwards and tried to summon fire.
"That's great, sweetie, now get to bed."
Unsatisfied, I went back to my room. So be it, when I become of age, I'll head to the kingdom and fool everybody. "mwahaMWAHAHAHA!"
"Honey… go to bed!"
"Sorry mom!" I cackled to myself silently.
And five years passed in the blink of an eye. Occasionally I'd feel the effects of [Did I miss anything?] It was like a faint buzzing feeling that instilled an innate understanding of what was happening. My former friends and fellow mob villagers were so strong it made me kind of nervous.
Recently the hero, or "Marcus," the kid who was always picked on for having a crush on "Madeline," who was now a saint, got married. I sniffled and rubbed my nose. Good for you kid, I'm just here, sitting in a grass field.
The old villagers celebrated my birthday recently.
A grandma even gave me a kiss. It was rather wet and sloppy, but I'll take what I can get. Anyway, I'll see you all soon. And I'll… rub in your face how strong I've gotten.
I managed to convince the elderly villagers I was a healer after studying advanced massage techniques. And now I am able to heal small pokes. After training for years, I was also able to convince them I was a swordsman after putting on a sword-dance show for them.
I can now slice a motionless fruit.
Getting up from the field and wiping dirt off my butt, I bravely marched to my house, I never actually told them my plan to leave. Whoops, phew, I'll be okay. Whew, I'm an adult.
"Mother! I'd like to head to the kingdom, I've grown strong, and… what are you doing?"
They were having a feast. "Oh son, we thought you left for the kingdom, you were always talking to yourself about it, usually muttering stuff like 'revenge' and 'congratulations Marcus' recently."
I shut the door, never to come back again.
Just then I felt a buzzing, [Did I miss anything?] Sir, what's up… oooh, nice. I'll unveil myself there. "MWAHAHAHA!" Manically screaming I dash into the forest, with only a general direction which in hindsight was a bad idea.
I was lost.
Almost instantly.
I had taken enough turns so I didn't even know the way back.
And the forest is surprisingly scary at night, but I was steadily getting closer to the kingdom, luckily the swordsman class allowed for slightly more endurance. I bet having the actual thing would make me a monster. No! I can have the real thing, I just have to fool people for it.
-AHHHHH!
There it is!
Usually [Did I miss anything?] Alerted me about the hero party, this one was a rare non-hero related ding. I ran faster now, a small clearing of bushes through it, a toppled carriage. And a princess, holding a sword against a gaggle of monsters.
I couldn't help but drool. Don't worry miss princess, I'll save you and make you think I'm a knight while I'm at it.
I jumped from out of the bushes, as dramatically as I could, a surprise slash, decapitating one of the orcs. What'd I tell you if there's an unmoving object I can cut ? I slid on the dirt, so I was standing right ahead of the princess.
"Who?"
"Shh… everything's okay now, I've come to save you." I turned back, sucking in my cheeks.
No reaction… that's alright, I just need to charm her with my words, I licked my lips heavily. "I'm a knight, I've been silently following you at the behest of the king, the reason I'm wearing this is for a disguise." She waited for a few moments, and I felt a warmth on my hands.
'Haha… yes…'
[Totally Looking for a job.
The 'knight' class has been unlocked.]
A roulette wheel animation appeared in my status window, a collection of knight skills. I silently prayed that I got something combat related.
Please, please, please. A good one, an S-rank!
[You have unlocked 'Eloquence'
Nobles have a certain tone that separates them from the lowly, such is eloquence. People are more likely to believe in you, perfect for trade deals or bartering.]
Great, perfect… except I'm currently fighting a bunch of orcs.
Time was up, the orcs closed in on me. Think Calvin, think. Got it.
I bent down, grasping a handful of dust, and as one of the hulking orcs came into range, I threw it into their eyes. Not the most honorable way but, using its distraction, I quickly sliced off its head, which seemed to make the princess believe in me more.
"'ll help, Knight." She quivered, balancing on her one good leg, unsheathing a sword that looked too fancy to be practical. But she was clearly a prodigy. Even while injured, she dodged an orc's punch, slicing its arm and making it reel in pain.
Stabbing it in the throat with viscous quickness.
[Looking for a job
Someone fully believes in your lie, congratulations.]
The roulette wheel played again… this, this has never happened before. Just how gullible is this princess? Still, it was good to know now, as long as it doesn't give me something like 'eloquence' again.
[You have unlocked 'Simple Stab'
Your stabs will be faster and therefore harder to dodge, also increasing the cutting ability of sharp weapons.]
Great! I'll test it right now. I focused on the orc ahead of me, dismissing my status window. He lunged, and I took a deep breath. 'Hah!' And unleashed my sword, it clearly noticed it, but it was too late. It writhed on my sword for a few seconds before going limp.
Haha, this is the best, thank you, gullible princess.
The last orc tried to run but slipped on a tree root. I sauntered up and [Simple Stabbed] him where the sun didn't shine.
Wiping sweat off my brow, I went to the princess who was completely covered in blood.
"Mister Knight, I don't know how to thank you, but if you'd like, I would like to properly repay you." At the kingdom."
I struggled to contain my excitement. I need to be stoic, like a knight. "If that's what your highness wants, who am I to disagree?" Thank you, 'eloquence.'
"Well, my carriage had been broken… but it's okay, the hero has given me something for situations like this.
"Hm? The hero? He gave the princess something? damn you Marcus.
She grabbed the whistle dangling from her neck, brought it to her mouth and blew. But no sound came out. I went to reassure her. I bet the hero didn't give her a defective product on purpose, unless he's taken on a life of scamming.
That was until I heard a sound, flapping? Subsequently, the trees began to blow to the side, splitting down the middle. I looked up quickly, holy! That's a dragon, a real dragon. Crap, do I need to fight a dragon? No, I 'll just run, I'm not actually a knight…
My mind went into a panic, but the princess seemed unfazed.
"This is a dragon the hero recently beat, he's been handing them out to all the important figures in the kingdom in case of emergencies, they're totally submissive to him. I can get you one if you want."
Marcus! Why are you handing dragons out like candy! You stupid kid! Damn… I want one.
"Right! Hop on, and be sure to hold on tight, he flies really fast!"
I wasn't really in the mood to respond, so I just lazily climbed atop the dragon. The scales are hurting my butt Marcus, get more comfortable dragons, man.
Dragons are indeed fast. My lips flapped so much I had to press my face against the dragon's scales. It was warm, as expected of a dragon. The princess, however, was calmly sitting criss-cross and staring straight ahead. "Sir knight, I've applied a wind barrier around you so you can… stop doing that."
She noticed after all. When I looked up, it didn't hurt. She's talented in magic too… is she the princess of a barbarian tribe or something?
"Sir knight… I know you weren't sent by my father."
My heart dropped, but I didn't lose the effects of the knight class, so I knew she still believed me somehow. "Why do you think that?"
She sighed and tugged at a scale like a scab before responding. "Because he has no interest in me, instead, he focuses on my brothers who are currently fighting for the crown… The whole reason I was in the forest was because of a political marriage. And don't you think that orcs suddenly appearing in the forest is weird. They usually appear in swamps after all."
Now that I think about it. "Yeah, that is weird. What's your point?"
"I'm a variable, physically strong, politically weak. One of my brothers sent the Orcs after me."
What kind of family is that? Sending orcs after their sister. Not bothering to even do it themselves, they're too scared to face her. A deep desire to protect the princess grew, just a seedling, but it was there.
[Totally looking for a job
[Knight] class is resonating…
Reward loading.
A bar appeared in my status window. Slowly, it fills up.
'Eloquence' and [Simple Stab] have leveled up. Congratulations.
]
Another new feature, princess… I'll truly follow you to the ends of the earth, hehe.
The princess continued. "Honestly, when you appeared out of nowhere, I was debating killing you. It was that suspicious, but even if you aren't my kingdom's knight, you definitely embody one."
The first part was worrying, but I chose to ignore it. If I'm still alive, I'll never complain.
Slowly the dragon descended, we passed the forest and entered a large glass clearing which met a drawbridge and led into the kingdom. The guards didn't seem fazed by the sudden dragon descent. Only those who didn't know current events were shocked.
Tales of the heroes' dragon-slaying had blown far and wide.
And the shiny-type princess helped, even if she was covered in orc blood. The grace of a noble can't be hidden.
Somehow, the one who got all the looks was me. 'Who's that guy?' 'How does he know the princess?'
The line moved for us, and in a blink we were at the front of the line. A shaky guard spoke, his voice a tremor. "u-u-um Princess Valerie…" He looked around for a helping hand. Poor guy, must be his first day on the job. I'll help him out.
'Eloquence' activated.
"Sir, if we may quickly pass through, Valerie has an appointment and must not be postponed any longer. Please move aside."
"A-ah yes, please… go ahead." He moved aside. Valerie looked back at me, clearly impressed.
The kingdom was bustling, completely unlike my village. Kids my age, kids younger than me, so little old people… finally.
"Sir knight, I know that is not the true way you speak. I'd like it if you talked casually, as long as we're alone, I mean."
I scratched the back of my neck. "Alright, I was wondering something then? If you were set up for a political marriage, won't the king be mad if you suddenly came back."
She shook her head. "There was no such noble person as the one I was wed to. It was all a ruse to get me into that trap. I thought I'd be able to defeat any trap with my strength but was injured after the carriage fell on my leg." Now that she mentioned it, while she was fighting the orcs, I noticed her grimacing. Her body was mostly covered by blood, so I didn't notice.
If I hadn't come… what would've happened to her. [Did I miss anything?] Activated, which means her plot is important. After five years with this skill, I've gotten the gist of what that meant. Marcus activated it the most whenever he gained a new powerful ally. Or a stronger weapon, an infuriating buzz ran to me. As if I could do anything.
Marcus wouldn't have made it, so her death was the way it was supposed to go.
Then me saving her will backfire on me somehow.
I shook my head, which confused the princess. 'I can't think about stuff like that, I just need to see it through.'
Following the princess, we took more and more confusing turns. I half expected to head to the castle immediately. A bad idea, given her brothers had just tried to kill her. We slipped into an alley, a broken town covering the entire western border of the kingdom.
The houses had boarded-up windows, bins with trash lit on fire for warmth. An old man held his hands out, asking for even a copper coin. Which made me realize how I had left home with no money and gave me a minor heart attack until I realized I was following a princess.
"Um… princess… Why are we strolling in the slums? Not that I don't trust you, just? I'm having a hard time understanding your brilliant line of thought."
She didn't look back, but gave me a prompt response. "There's an informant who lives here. Despite being the best, for some reason they chose to live in the slums. My brothers find them distasteful, mostly because they find my brothers distasteful."
"Right, and how do you know someone like that?"
"Childhood friend."
Ah, thank you, Princess. Now I get it.
I looked down and waved at my organs. It was nice knowing you guys, thanks for everything.
A run-down building, a saloon-style door. Dank and dark, filled with the stench of sweat and blood. Except it was totally empty. The wind blew the door open, and we walked in. I hid behind the princess, sneakily enough so she wouldn't notice.
Standing in the middle of the room now, still nothing.
"Princess, are you sure this is the…"
-Fwoosh
-Drip…
I drifted my hand to my cheek. A slight cut spanned it. A knife stuck to the wall, wiggling from the force of the throw.
"Pippa! Do not kill him, he is… my knight?" Wow, princess, way to show your faith.
The room went silent for a few seconds before a woman popped out from under the counter, a cheeky grin on her face, "Sorry, you suddenly came to me with a suspicious-looking man. I was just gonna scare him off."
I'm… suspicious.
"He may look suspicious, but he has a good heart, I think?" She looked at me as if she were asking me to confirm.