Asherah's smile finally disappeared.
"Tsk." She clicked her tongue. "Oi. What's with you? Can you not fuck with my fun? If you're going to be this annoying, I'll simply take him by force."
Golden particles suddenly swirled around Shizuka's feet.
"Eh—?!"
He floated half a meter off the ground, skirt fluttering wildly, arms windmilling. "O-Onii-chan!!"
"Shizuka!!"
I lunged forward, grabbing his ankle—only for my fingers to pass right through warm, tingling light. The particles lifted him higher.
Asherah watched with bored amusement.
"See? Easy."
I stared up at her. The golden glow, the impossible beauty, the floating boy in a skirt, the absolute confidence in her posture—it finally clicked.
She really was a goddess.
Not a trafficker. Not a cosplayer. Not a hallucination from eating expired convenience store onigiri again.
A real, actual, divine being?!
And she was about to kidnap my little brother.
My vision tunneled.
"Wait!" I screamed, dropping to my knees without even realizing it. "Please wait! Take me instead! I'll... I'll defeat your stupid Demon Lord for you! I'll do it! Just don't take Shizuka!!"
Silence prevailed.
Asherah looked down at me—really looked at me—for the first time, I believe.
Then she burst out laughing, then stopped abruptly.
"…Mhm. No."
She flicked her wrist. Shizuka floated another meter higher, whimpering.
"You're ugly," she said simply. "So no."
My mouth opened and closed like a dying fish.
"WHAT DOES APPEARANCE HAVE TO DO WITH SLAYING A DEMON LORD?!"
She shrugged one perfect shoulder, causing interesting things to happen under the thin white fabric.
"Everything, darling. Everything."
Shizuka's small voice floated down from above, trembling but determined.
"O-Onii-chan… go, go… Onii-chan, go…! You can do it!"
Even now he was cheering for me!
I clenched both fists so hard my nails bit into my palms.
I didn't indoctrinate him. I swear to god I didn't. He just… naturally understands that Onii-chan is the greatest existence in the universe. That's all.
(And if anyone ever accuses me of brainwashing my adorable little brother from childhood, I will fight them to the death.)
Asherah sighed theatrically and glanced at the slowly setting sun.
"Well. I suppose I can give you ten more seconds to beg prettily before I leave with my new favorite toy."
Ten seconds.
Ten seconds to convince an actual goddess to choose me—an ugly (actually, just slightly below average), glasses-wearing martial-arts-otaku who can't even throw a proper punch anymore—over the cutest little brother in the world.
I took a deep breath.
Here goes nothing.
***
I closed my eyes and tried—really tried—to dig deep into my soul for some profound wisdom. Something poetic. Something that would make even a goddess pause and think, "Wow, this ugly mortal has hidden depths."
But nothing came.
So I did the only thing my average brain could come up with in a panic.
I lunged forward, wrapped both arms around Asherah's impossibly narrow waist, and clung like a drowning man to driftwood.
"Fine!" I yelled into the soft golden fabric over her stomach. "Then I'll s-s-sexually harass you until you leave my cute brother alone!"
A high-pitched, genuinely startled "Eep!" escaped the goddess.
"Get away, you ugly duckling!"
Her hands shoved at my face, nails scraping my cheeks, but I locked my fingers behind her back and refused to budge. And oh god—oh no—
She was so soft.
Her body radiated heat like sun-warmed marble.
Every curve I accidentally pressed against felt obscene: the dramatic flare of her hips, the plush give of her lower belly, the way her massive breasts squished against my forehead when she tried to push me down.
A sweet, intoxicating scent flooded my nose—honey, amber, something floral and molten all at once. My traitorous dick twitched hard in my dark pants, swelling painfully against the zipper in seconds.
Yabai. Yabai yabai yabai.
I'm getting a full-blown erection from hugging a goddess in an alley.
Molestation is a crime! They'll lock me in the deepest circle of hell for this. But if I let go now she'll take Shizuka away to film some otherworldly AV and—
And... I'd rather burn beside Satan than let that happen!
Asherah's struggles grew frantic. She yanked at my hair, pushed at my shoulders, even tried to knee me—none of it worked. I was stuck to her like glue.
"Wait—wait a second, you piece of fuck!" Her voice cracked with disbelief. "You have an erection?! I mean, I don't blame you, my divine presence is irresistible, but—your lovely little brother is watching!"
I froze, then my eyes snapped up.
Shizuka was still floating a meter off the ground, skirt fluttering, red eyes huge and glistening. He was staring straight at the obscene bulge tenting my pants while I groped his would-be kidnapper.
Shame hit me like a truck.
But then—
"O... Onii-chan, I know you can do it!" His voice trembled but rang with pure, innocent faith. "Even if you lose your humanity… I know you're a good big brother at heart!!"
My chest squeezed so hard I almost cried.
That's right.
That's exactly why I love him so much.
No matter how low I sink, no matter how much of a degenerate I become in this moment, Shizuka still believes in me. He always has.
I smiled—probably looking deranged—and whispered,
"Sorry, Asherah—"
"At least say Asherah-sama, you filthy mortal!"
"I'll have to become that which I never wanted to become… FOR MY CUTE LITTLE BROTHER!!"
My hands moved before my brain could stop them.
One slid down and boldly grabbed a full, plump handful of her ass.
Oh god, it was even softer than it looked—cheeks so round and heavy they overflowed my palm, yielding like warm dough.
My other hand shot upward, cupping one enormous breast through the thin white fabric. The weight alone made my head spin; the nipple was already stiff, poking shamelessly against my fingers.
Then—higher brain functions completely offline—I slipped both hands under the fabric of her dress.
Her raw skin, silky, and fever-hot.
I squeezed her bare ass with one hand, fingers sinking deep into the plush flesh, while the other found a naked breast. The mound was impossibly full, spilling over my grip; the nipple was thick and pebbled. I rolled it between thumb and forefinger without thinking.
"Hey—wai—not like that! Not there—!"
Asherah's voice cracked.
Her grip on my shoulders weakened. Her shoves turned into trembles. A soft, involuntary whimper slipped past her lips.
Eh?
Ehhhhhh?!
Is she… enjoying this?