Chapter 11: The Academy That Tests Fate
The morning sun rose normally, and that alone made Bai Ze suspicious. After the road convergence incident—Spirit Hall arriving early, the world remembering his existence, and the accidental political "kiss of doom" with Bibi Dong—the world should have already collapsed. Instead, birds chirped, the wind smelled like fresh grass, and everything appeared perfectly ordinary. Too ordinary.
Bai Ze stood in front of the crooked Shrek Academy gate, staring at the sign that looked like it might fall off if someone sneezed too hard. Behind him, Tang San, Xiao Wu, Dai Mubai, Oscar, Ning Rongrong, and Zhu Zhuqing were lined up, looking exactly as they had in the memories of the timeline—except now, everyone sensed a disturbance, a subtle wrongness in the air.
Tang San exhaled slowly, remembering the moment from the "original timeline." This was supposed to be his stage, the first test that would shape the Shrek Academy legend. Yet here stood Bai Ze, casual, indifferent, arms folded inside his sleeves. Somehow, he belonged here now. This shouldn't be possible, Tang San thought. And yet… he exists.
An old man at the entrance table squinted at Bai Ze. "Requirements: under thirteen, spirit power above twenty-one, and pay the fee."
Bai Ze raised a lazy hand. "…What if I'm mentally exhausted instead of physically young?"
"…How old are you?" the examiner asked.
"Biologically young. Existentially tired," Bai Ze replied. The old man shrugged and waved him forward.
Spirit power test next. Each student touched the crystal ball. Tang San passed, Xiao Wu passed, Dai Mubai flexed and passed, Ning Rongrong beamed and passed. Then Bai Ze touched the ball. It pulsed faintly, then went dark. "…Pass," said the examiner, clearly not wanting to argue with fate itself.
By noon, the combat assessment began. The students were led into the inner training grounds, where the Immovable King, Zhao Wuji, awaited, broad-shouldered, arms folded, aura heavy enough to make the earth tremble slightly.
"Beat me," Zhao Wuji said, "or survive one stick of incense."
Tang San flinched. "Survive one stick?"
Oscar muttered, "…That's not a test. That's assault."
Zhao Wuji ignored him, laughing. "That's Shrek Academy."
Tang San noticed Bai Ze standing off to the side, yawning. "…You aren't going to fight?"
Bai Ze shrugged. "…Is it optional?"
"No."
"Then unfortunate."
Tang San and the others moved first. Blue Silver Grass shot from the ground, coiling toward Zhao Wuji. Xiao Wu leapt midair, her pink figure spinning toward him. Dai Mubai's White Tiger spirit surged as he clawed toward the Immovable King.
Zhao Wuji laughed, taking the attacks casually. Vines snapped, Xiao Wu was swatted gently aside, Dai Mubai staggered back, boots cutting grooves into the dirt. "Good! Very good!"
Then Zhao Wuji's gaze landed on Bai Ze.
"You," he said. "Join the fight."
Bai Ze yawned. "…I prefer observational learning."
"…Huh?" Zhao Wuji blinked.
Bai Ze finally stepped forward. Zhao Wuji charged, fist raised, ground cracking under the weight. Bai Ze reacted late, tripping over a small stone, nearly face-planting. He rolled to the side, accidentally hooking Zhao Wuji's ankle with his robe. The Immovable King stumbled. Oscar whispered, "Did… he just trip him?"
Bai Ze lay flat on the ground. "…I swear, I didn't do that on purpose."
Tang San blinked. Even accidents are perfect with him.
Zhao Wuji's eyes narrowed, aura flaring. Pressure slammed outward. The other students staggered, bracing themselves. Bai Ze picked up a broken wooden staff from the ground. Not a weapon. Just… wood. He tapped it against the dirt, and Swordsmanship flowed instinctively, without effort.
He stepped forward. A single swing. Zhao Wuji's instincts misfired. One fist meant to crush, but he froze mid-motion, slightly off balance. Bai Ze tripped again—not gracefully—and landed on Zhao Wuji's shoulder. He froze. Zhao Wuji's eyes widened. "…You're doing this deliberately!"
Bai Ze coughed. "If I were deliberate, I'd be rich and retired. I'm just sleepy."
Suddenly, in the middle of Zhao Wuji's recovering balance, Tang San moved to intervene, forgetting that he had been practicing defensive moves. One misstep, one awkward turn—and his lips collided with Zhao Wuji's cheek in a perfectly accidental kiss. Zhao Wuji froze, eyes blinking, expression unreadable. Bai Ze's eyebrow twitched.
Ning Rongrong shrieked, covering her face. "T-This is… absurd!"
Tang San flailed. "…It was an accident!"
Zhao Wuji rubbed his cheek slowly, blinking several times. "…I… what?"
Bai Ze muttered under his breath: "Welcome to my timeline."
Bai Ze finally got serious. Staff in hand, he moved fluidly. Not fast, not flashy—precise. Zhao Wuji swung, but Bai Ze read every motion. He tapped Zhao Wuji lightly with the staff. Nothing harmful, but enough to throw the King off rhythm. Zhao Wuji's reactions slowed, confused, vulnerable.
Bai Ze stepped in again, a controlled combination of pressure points and momentum. Zhao Wuji staggered backward, then forward, then sideways. Each move precise, each tap calculated. The pressure increased, and Zhao Wuji finally tripped over his own foot in frustration, landing hard on the dirt.
Ning Rongrong peeked, blushing furiously. "I-I can't believe he's doing this! How is he so…?"
Bai Ze glanced at her. "…Flustered?"
"Yes!" she shouted. "Ugh, don't look at me like that!"
Bai Ze smirked faintly. "…Noted."
With one final, perfectly measured step, Bai Ze shifted weight, tapped Zhao Wuji's shoulders in a rhythmic motion, and Zhao Wuji's body finally collapsed in a faint. The incense had burned out anyway.
Everyone froze. Tang San stared. Dai Mubai blinked. Oscar fainted slightly. Ning Rongrong's hands flew to her cheeks, nearly tipping herself over.
Bai Ze bent over Zhao Wuji. "…You should really rest more."
Zhao Wuji groaned, still unconscious.
Bai Ze stepped back, adjusting his sleeves. "Third day at Shrek, first boss defeated. Progress reasonable."
Ning Rongrong glared, red-faced. "Don't… talk like that!"
Bai Ze shrugged. "What? You like it."
Tang San groaned. "…My life is a mess."
Oscar whispered to Dai Mubai: "…Love life already started, huh?"
That night, the academy accepted all students officially. Tang San realized clearly that Bai Ze's existence had changed the rhythm of history, not by brute strength but by simply being. That night, as everyone settled, a minor world anomaly was detected outside the academy grounds. Bai Ze smiled faintly. "…So the real fun starts now."