It was around age 6 that I started school, which was kindergarten, considering I grew up in America. I recall a few memories from back then. I recall playing around with Christmas gifts. Doing things I felt like I wasn't supposed to do. I don't know why, but I still did some things that seemed unusual for a kid. Just minor actions that made me question "hm…. Why did I do this back then?"
I remember the name of my kindergarten best friend. We went to a babysitter after school let out. We were friends in kindergarten until he left with his family for China. I recall him playing in the small children's playground. He was just swinging on the monkey bar. I don't know why, but I decided to just go right in front of him. It was a dumb move, I'm aware, and I got kicked in the face. My mom had been shocked at why on Earth I had a black eye when she picked me up. I don't recall her reaction when I explained to her that my best friend kicked me in the face because I stood in front of him.
I truly don't know why I did that. Did I want attention? Did I not know how to get the attention I wanted back then? Are these memories helpful in making me question why I do such odd and weirdly "self-harmful" ways? Just exactly why do I do something like this? I have no idea why I do it, but if anyone else knows why, I'd love to hear it. Please do tell me, I wish I knew why I would do such foolish actions.
[You have acquired the title: The Odd One ]
So much for having a best friend when mine in kindergarten had already left and was in China. I still remember his full name back then, though, and remembered the company I was in with him. I wonder how he is doing now and if he is still in China. I sometimes imagine what it would be like if we ever crossed paths again. I see the possibility of him being back in America, though I'm sure he would have forgotten about me. I often remember details about people if I have a strong enough emotional attachment to them. I guess one could say I was unintentionally abandoned by this young boy. I mean, we were just a 6-year-old and a 7-year-old, anyway. Yet from teenagehood to young adulthood, I remember his full name and some important memories about my first-ever best friend.
[Regression Cycle has been activated:
Cause of Regression:
First best friend leaving
Regression Cycle:
1st turn → 2nd turn]