"And so that's how it is." Baoba was back at the apartment, after a quick shower, he immediately broke the news. "It's happening it five days."
He expected cheers, groans, or complaints. But to his surprise, even Venus was serious. They received the news with a great deal of professionalism.
It was weird.
Capscium sighed. "This is it, then. The plan still holds, right ?"
"Yes. Just do what I told you to, and we'll have a good chance to win."
Through the silence -quite natural this time- Baoba could almost hear all of their brains mulling over his previously given instructions.
"You know.. It almost doesn't feel real." Urtica leaned on the back of the room's chair from behind. "We've been at this for so long. It seems like yesterday, we got out of that huge fire, not knowing what to do at all... And now we're about to succeed."
"It's just the first part. Remember, we only need Noti to tell us a way to safely get more blessings." Pando corrected, as she liked to do.
"Right, yeah. Of course." In response, Urtica shrunk back, as he often did.
"I get what he means, though. We're finally taking a meaningful step. Plus, it involves clobbering those guys. A nice bonus." Venus winked. "Captain would tell us if it was a dream, right ?"
He frowned as he got distracted by the question. "Well.. no. If it was mine, you wouldn't be conscious, and if it was yours, then I would be a figment of your imagination. I imagine it'd be possible, if you think of me like this... but it would mean you already knew."
"My apologies." The orb from which the Mother spoke floated to the center. "I do feel reluctant to interrupt, but you said it was fine 13 days ago. I have a question. What does that have to do with the task at hand ?"
She really did have the knack to annoy him.
'Is it the way she talks ? The way it directly pops into my brain without me hearing it ? Or just how she says things ?'
"If you must know, it did not actually have a logical link. But the assault is in five days, we have plenty of time."
"Which means ?"
He clicked his tongue.
"It means we can weather this most terrible loss, o great Mother. Please forgive us for our transgression." He apologised with an exaggerated bow.
The orb 'stood' still for five seconds before floating towards Venus.
"I notice his politeness sometimes spikes. Could you tell me why ?"
She started stammering and sweating profusely from the normal feelings of anxiety that usually come with conversing with the deity that created your race.
"It's uh, it's- it- it's a... mental condition."
...
"That's right. I was born like this. Nothing I can do about it, so you shouldn't read into it." He slowly indicated 'no' with his head while looking directly at the orb, continuing : "Please believe me when I say I mean nothing but pleasantries. I have never concealed my true meaning."
The mother seemed to be deep in thought.
He waited. They had time, and he wanted to hear this.
Eventually, she spoke. "I am confused. You have both provided me with an answer that fits previous behavior, and yet it is the first time I am hearing about such an illness, and Baoba's body language seems to indicate some kind of subtext... On the other hand, the supposed illness would explain that too... However, I have not noticed this behavior when he talked to anyone but me. The more I think about it, the less sense makes this condition. But why would you both lie at the same time ?
"This is.... I must go." She lowered the orb, phasing through the coffe table, then the ground.
'Looks like she'll need more time to process that one.'
Capcsium looked up, eyes wide. "Well that wasn't very nice !"
"Don't look at me !" He protested. "Venus is the one who came up with it. I just took it and ran."
"That was pretty weird." Urtica said, raising an eyebrow. "Why couldn't you just say he was being a prick ?"
"I don't know ?!"She made big gestures with her arms that barely said anything. "What if, she like, smote him or something ? What if she just left ? I panicked, alright ?"
"If you were looking for excuses," Pando interjected, "saying it was a joke would have worked better. She doesn't quite get those yet."
"I hope she learns soon, though." Baoba sat down. "It's a real shame she can't see how hilarious I am."
Silence. Sudden silence.
The elves in the room inspected their captain.
"What ?"
They inspected some more.
"Seriously, what is going on ?"
.... There were no signs of sarcasm. He believed what he had just said.
Capcsium pinched her nosebridge and shook her head. Venus let her head down, facing her feet with a sigh. Pando was stern as usual. Urtica was in the process of crossing his arms.
".. I mean, at least he's confident, right ?" Capscium finally spoke. "Apparently that's half of the way there."
Urtica scoffed. "Yeah, and then he'll still need to do half of that, and then half of that, and so on until he never finds anyone else than the queen piece."
Baoba was perplexed. "I'm still here."
"No, no, the queen has the king already." Pando shook her head. "She won't renounce the crown for the likes of him. He may be good at strategy, but nobles hardly care about that."
"Why have I been rejected by a piece of wood ?" He asked.
Venus disregarded it. "True. What do you think he could score then ? Maybe a bishop ? He is a priest, now, after all."
"Uhh, no, no, no no no, bishops are a no. I have a bad image of them right now. Wait, why am I even arguing this..."
Still talking over him, Urtica noted : "Most bishops are supposed to be celibate. If the queen won't cheat on her king, then they won't cheat on their god."
"Are you guys hearing me at all ? Have I become invisible ?"
"Are the knights the horses, or the ones riding them ?" Asked Capcsium. "That would make a big difference. I'm not sure horses would be into elves, but I'm sure our captain can play the part of a damsel in distress and pull a knight."
The important debate over which chess piece would date Baoba continued like this for a while. He was being ignored the whole time.
'That's nice. I was looking forward to getting disrespected by my men. Cool. Glad I chose these guys. Not regretting it at all.'
He 'stormed off', only smiling after leaving their line of sight.
***
There wasn't much to do. Capscium was preparing bombs all day, smiling from ear to ear. They didn't actually need that many, but she didn't seem to care.
There was also a moderate amount of breaking and entering. Nothing much.
The hardest part of the preparation was to know precisely who was a Ring and who wasn't. This was luckily acheived through different objectives.
Three days passed, and only then did Baoba warn the church about Evans' hunt timing. It was a number precisely calculated, if they had too much time to prepare, the ambush might end too fast, and if they had too little, Anderson might reconsider the whole plan.
Emphasis on 'might'. It was a small chance. But a chance nonetheless.
Two days had been more than they had expected. The church was full of activity, at least in the parts that were not available to the public. The attacking party was solidifying. As expected, most of the personnel was going to go. The large part of the ones who stayed had actual emergencies or health cirsis, so they were not going to be on guard duty either.
Including Baoba, there would be sixteen guards.
Among them, twelve Rings.
Those odds didn't look any more promising than they first did.
None of them ever did.