KAVEN
"She's been out there for a while now."
I looked at Kian as he whispered beside me, subtly pointing toward the glass window of the coffee shop where I worked.
Outside, Naih was standing near the entrance her arms are crossed, phone in hand, eyes scanning the inside as if she were waiting for something or someone.
I breathe slowly, and looked away.
"Damn, your girl's got some nerve," Kian added with a dry laugh.
"Cheats on you and still has the audacity to show her face."
I didn't reply. I don't want to reply.
When it came to her, I always fell silent.
No matter how hard I tried to defend her, even in myself, I knew they weren't wrong. Everything they said about her is true. I was the only one who refuse to believe it. Or maybe… I am just scared to admit that she's not the same Naid i used to know.
"Go talk to her already!" Ciaro shouted from behind the counter while aggressively mopping the floor. I knew he's pissed. He hates Naih. "She's been causing a scene out there. Customers are starting to leave."
I just nodded, i don't know what to say.
I was already planning to go outside. I just want to finish what I was doing, anything to delay the inevitable. Anything to give myself a few more seconds before facing her.
When I finally clocked out, I wiped my hands on my apron and walked out of the coffee shop. The bell above the door chimed softly, announcing my exit.
And there she was.
"Babe!"
Her eyes lit up the moment she saw me, like nothing was wrong. Like she hadn't broken me just days ago. Like she hadn't shattered whatever was left of my trust.
I stopped a few steps away from her, my feet frozen in place.
I couldn't find the words. I couldn't even find my voice.
"I was waiting for you," she said, stepping closer. "Are you tired? Do you want to eat?"
It felt like something was lodged in my throat, tight, painful, impossible to swallow. I wanted to answer. I wanted to say something. But i can't, no words are coming out.
"Babe, please answer me." She muttered, begging.
I avoided her gaze.
I'm afraid, because i know the moment I looked at her, I knew I would give in. I always give in.
Niah was the only one who stayed when I had nothing. When I was at my lowest. When everyone else walked away, she was there. She was my anchor. My safe place.
But now… she wasn't the same Niah I knew anymore.
In the one and a half years we were together, we never had problems. Not real ones, at least. We were solid. Stable. Certain.
But everything changed when we entered college.
The Niah I knew from high school slowly disappeared. Replaced by someone louder, bolder, more reckless. Someone who craved attention and validation from people I didn't even recognize.
"Why?" I simply muttered.
Out of all the questions screaming inside my head, that was the only one that escaped my lips.
Why did you change?
Why did you hurt me?
Why wasn't I enough?
"Babe… I'm sorry," she said quickly. "Let's fix this, okay? Please."
How many times had I heard that?
This cycle breaking, apologizing, forgiving—had become our routine. She did it because she knew I couldn't let her go. Because she knew she was all I had.
"Promise," she added softly. Trying to touch me, but i avoid her touches. I'm in pain. I don't know what to do. My body move on his own. "I'll change." she whispered, pain was visible in her voice.
I finally looked at her. I swallowed while looking at her, pain was visible in her eyes. She looked sincere. Or maybe she just knew how to look sincere.
I didn't know anymore.
I was exhausted. Tired of doubting. Tired of hurting. But the thought of losing her scared me more than the pain she caused.
What would happen to me without her?
She was the only one who understood me. The only one who accepted me. The reason I was still here, still fighting, still breathing.
What would I become if she left me? How am going to survive without her?
Slowly, I nodded.
Once again. I forgive.
She smiled and wrapped her arms around me, hugging me gently, like she hadn't just broken my heart.
I hugged her back.
Maybe i could still handle this… right? Maybe this time she will change. Maybe this time she'll realize that what she's doing is causing me pain. Maybe....
"Good," she whispered against my shoulder. "You only have me. Remember that. I love you, okay?"
"The one and only king of stupidity—Kaven Reyes everyone. Let's give him a round of applause !"
I shot Ria a glare as she yelled my name across the hallway. Her voice was loud—too loud. Typical Ria. She had the voice of a dock worker trapped in the body of a college girl.
"Don't look at me like that," she continued. "I already warned you. I did my part. And you decide to follow WHAT YOU THINK IS FUCKING RIGHT!" She's mad. I could hear it thought her voice.
"Yeah, yeah," I muttered.
"Honestly, Kaven, you stress me out more than my grades."
Maybe I really was the problem.
"Canteen?" I offered. "My treat."
She immediately brightened. "Now you're talking. I love you as much as i hate you. "
As we walked, she started ranting nonstop. "I swear, Sir Castro is insane. He gives a mountain of work and still hands out tres like candy. I hope his remaining hair finally falls out."
"You're evil," I said.
"He started it."
Suddenly, Ria stopped walking.
"Oh, hell no."
I followed her gaze.
It was Niah.
She was standing near the canteen entrance—laughing. With a guy.
A guy who definitely wasn't me. Fuck!
"Son of a—" Ria clenched her fists. "That girl has no shame. Harap-harapan talaga?"
I grabbed her hand before she could charge forward. "Ria. Stop."
No one in school knew about my relationship with Niah. We weren't hiding—but we weren't public either. Not here.
"I'll talk to her," I said quietly.
Ria sighed, her anger softening. "Kaven… please. Don't do this to yourself. You know Jason and I are here, right? You matter to us. You're like family."
I didn't respond.
I just stared down at the table, sipping my Coke, watching the bubbles rise and disappear—just like everything good in my life.
"What happened here?"
Jason's voice cut through the noise as he arrived with a tray full of food.
"Are you blind?" Ria snapped. "Isn't it obvious?"
"Why are you being a bitch early in the morning?" Jason grumbled.
"You're annoying."
"You're ugly."
"Both of you shut up," I muttered, though there was no real heat in it.
They were always like this—fighting like cats and dogs. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if they ended up together someday.
"Disgusting," Ria said, eyeing Jason's plate. "You're so unhygienic."
"You eat like a gremlin," Jason shot back.
They started fighting over food, and for a moment, I almost smiled.
Almost.
My life was so different from Niah's.
She hung out with popular students—people who partied, drank, laughed too loud. People who easily fit in.
While I only had Ria and Jason.
Sometimes I wondered if the problem was me. If I was holding her back. If she had outgrown me while I stayed the same—quiet, insecure, afraid of change.
Maybe people really do change depending on where they are.
Niah grew and here i am still stuck being me.